Matty's Story
by WammygirlZ
Summary: How MattxMello came to be. Told In Matt/Mello's point of view. There's a roller coaster of emotions: from happy to sad and from anger to love. The path to serenity is a long one to walk, but in the end, it's worth it. Yaoi and Lemon! COMPLETE!
1. Mommy

**Fanfiction by Ray. You'll see more of me... Mwahaha!**

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><p>Mommy is soft.<p>

I knew that ever since I was little. I wasn't a loud child, not one for making trouble or annoying people. Daddy would always get mad at me if I was too loud. Mommy needed to rest. Late at night, if I was too loud earlier, or if Daddy had yelled at me, I would come see Mommy to apologize. One night, when I was nine, Daddy left us all alone. I stayed up all night as she stroked my hair, sitting beside her bed with my arms wrapped around my knees., and my goggles around my neck.

"I'm sorry Mommy." I told her over and over again, every time she cried. "I'm sorry." She touched my shoulder and said,

"I love you Mail." and she stopped crying. Mommy stopped moving. I guess I did too. Eventually, the police found us. They told me Mommy was gone. At first, I didn't get it. My Mommy was right there. She was so close I could touch her. But eventually, it hit. And a few weeks after that, I joined Wammy's.

I didn't speak, but the three men with me, Rodger, L and Watari were happy when I got the answers right on my tests. Rodger brought me and my bag to a room and introduced me to my room-mate. I hadn't had any friends or siblings, and I didn't want to talk, so I went straight to bed. I thought about maybe talking to my room-mate in the morning.

When I woke up, my room-mate was sitting on the floor with a bunch of papers and books. I sat beside him with my arms around myself and read his book, noticing wrong answers but still not saying anything. He was very focused, and I could look at him easily.

He had blond hair and pretty blue eyes. He was dressed in all black. He glanced up at me a few times, but didn't say anything, he just glared and frowned more and more before bursting out,

"What are you looking at? Have a problem with my face?" I curled up in a ball and shook my head vigorously, trying not to cry. He glared at me hard for a moment, but his face softened eventually. "Sorry. I'm not good with people. Just try not to stare, okay? It's rude." I nodded nervously, and he closed his book and sat in a different position, with his legs stretched out beside me. "Did they give you a new name?" he asked. I nodded. "Mine's Mello." he said softly. I just looked at him. After a moment of silence, he said, "You must be hungry. Want some food?" I shrugged, and he stood up, holding a hand out to help me up. I looked up at him and he said, "We go to a different room to eat." I took his hand and got up, and followed him to eat breakfast.

I put on my too-big goggles as we got closer to the noise of the dining hall. I knew it was called that because I read the sign. Mello looked at me every few minutes, making sure I was still there. I kept my hands in my pockets, looking down. I sat with Mello and looked at my food, staying silent. Mello talked to me about classes and yelled at someone for making fun of my hair. I got up and started walking back our room, but got lost, so I sat on the floor with my back against the wall and stared at my feet. Mello found me and crouched in front of me, looking at me.

"Why do you wear those goggles?" he asked. I just looked at him. He sighed. "Will you at least tell me your name?" I looked around, making it clear that I didn't want to talk where someone else might hear me. He helped me up and we went to out room. Mello went back to his work and I sat with him again.

"Matt." I said quietly. His head snapped up.

"What?"

"They told me I was Matt." I held back tears, but failed, and pulled off my goggles, rubbing my eyes. "Where's my Mommy?" I asked. "She isn't really dead, is she? They're just pretending! I'll be better! I promise! Just please let me go home! I won't make any noise! Daddy can yell at me all day if he wants, just bring back my Mommy!" I started sobbing, and Mello tried to comfort me, I continued yelling, begging, sobbing, but he said he couldn't do anything. He left while I started screaming, and Watari came back with him, picking me up and bringing me to Rodger's office. Mello followed us quietly, looking scared.

I stopped yelling, but continued to cry softly while I waited for Rodger to come out and see me. When he came out, he motioned for me to come closer and he put a hand on my shoulder. He told Mello to come with us.

"Matt," he said when we got into a different room. "Your mother is dead. We can't find your father. But this is your home now. You're safe here." I sniffed and wiped my face with my sleeve.

"It's my fault." I said knowingly. "It's my fault Daddy left and that's why Mommy died. It's my fault she's gone."

"No it's not." he said calmly.

"YES IT IS! DON'T LIE TO ME! MOMMY SAID IT'S BAD TO LIE! I WAS BAD AND DADDY DIDN'T LIKE IT AND MOMMY DIED BECAUSE OF ME! _I DID IT!_" I started sobbing again and Rodger started saying something, but I only stopped crying when Mello touched my shoulder.

"My mother is dead too." he said gently. "I felt like it was my fault too, but it's not. And it's not your fault either." I looked at him for a minute, then tentatively stepped closer. He let me hug him. And we were friends ever since.


	2. Make Up Your Mind

**Back again! Teeheehee!**

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><p>The top three smartest in Wammy's were Near, Mello and me. At age 14, Mello and I had become almost brothers, and my nightmares were nearly non-existent. I accepted Wammy's as a home, and Mello as my best friend. There was almost a contest at Wammy's, with the same prize if you won.<p>

You became an heir to L.

Mello hated Near. Near brought the monster out in Mello. He made Mello stomp around the room, throw things, yell, punch things and even once, shed a tear. I realized quickly that since I didn't really hate Near, I just had to make Mello laugh. I was one of the only people who could. When Mello came into the room after a meeting with L, slamming the door and yelling,

"Fuck Near! Just fuck him! I wish he would just crawl into a hole and bury his fucking white ass head in... in dirt!" I whistled, getting his attention.

"That's very unoriginal." I said, keeping my eyes on the T.V screen. Oh, I had also discovered video games. I was sitting in front of the couch.

"Excuse me?"

"You make him sound like an ostrich, but we both know he's more the sheep type." Mello burst out laughing suddenly, anger forgotten.

"Oh, Matt. You make me laugh." He threw himself onto the couch behind me, his leg touching my neck. Shivers ran down my spine, and I quickly pulled my goggles on, more of a security blanket type of habit than anything else. At least they fit now. "Matt?"

"Yeah?" Mello sat up behind me and leaned over me, pausing my game. I looked up at him, my head resting on his crossed legs.

"Do you think I'm better than Near?" his eyes had lost the anger, now they were just sad and curious.

"Yes, I do." he smiled fleetingly, and moved my head off of him, going over to his desk to work. I resumed my game.

Lately I had been feeling different towards Mello. He made me feel strange. All tingly and shivery and he made my heart feel good. I didn't know if it was good or bad and I didn't know if I should tell someone or not. Besides, who was I going to tell? Mello was pretty much the only one I talked to. And what was I going to say, _Yeah, Mello? You make me feel funny inside and I kind of like it. Can you tell me what that means? Cause I have no fucking clue. _ Yeah right. I looked over at him, bending over his work. His hair was shaggy and uneven, his eyes still beautiful. I had always thought he was beautiful. But I wasn't sure what that meant anymore. He sensed me looking at me and snapped,

"Take a picture, it lasts longer!"

"Sorry!" I had been killed by the boss while I wasn't looking. _Damn it, _I thought. _He's so distracting._

"Why must you stare?" asked Mello from across the room.

"I- I dunno." I mumbled, blushing. He was quiet for a moment then barked,

"Turn that shit down. I can't concentrate." I stuck my arm out and yelled,

"Heil Hitler!" making him chuck a pencil at my head, laughing.

In the middle of the night, I woke up after another nightmare, clicking on my light and sitting on the floor beside my bed. Mello tossed and turned before, turning to face me, rubbing his eyes.

"Matty? Why are you on the ground?" I looked up at him with tears in my eyes and he sat up.

"Oh no. Not again?" I nodded and hugged my knees like I did when I was little. He hopped out of bed, putting a hand on my head to make me look at him. "It was bad?" I stared at him. "C'mon Matty. I don't want you to lose your voice again."I swallowed and cleared my throat, making sure my voice was normal.

"I'm fine." I whispered, trying to smile. Mello smiled back and got back into bed, patting the space beside him.

"Come on." He said, like you would to a dog, and like a dog, I hopped up and curled into a ball under the blankets. He laughed and looked at me while I fell asleep. _You have such beautiful eyes, Mello. _I'm not sure if I said it or was thinking it, but it didn't matter to me because I had worked it out for myself.

And my decision felt right.


	3. Fresh Pain

**Warning- There is some potentially disturbing material in this chapter, so brace yourselves.**

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><p>It was Saturday, and I woke up after Mello, alone in the bed. I sighed and stared at the pillow for a moment, then got up out of bed, going to the couch. I tripped before I could get there though, catching myself with my hands before I could fall on my face.<p>

"Ow. Shit. Why the fuck did you step on me?" whimpered Mello.

"Ah! I'm sorry!" I scrambled away from him, curling up into my protective ball, grasping for my goggles that weren't around my neck. Yeah, I had a few childhood habits. "I didn't see you." I went into automatic apology mode.

"Relax, Matt. God, you're such a woman sometimes." I blushed and stood up, offering him a hand. He batted it away and lay on the floor again, looking at the ceiling.

"What are you doing?" he smiled, and just like that, the tripping was forgotten.

"Getting a new perspective on life." he said softly. I sat beside him and stared at him while he was distracted, his icy blue eyes darting around the ceiling. Suddenly, they flicked to me, making me jump and blush. I looked away quickly, but I was caught. "Seriously, what's with you staring?"

"Nothing. I don't know. I'm sorry!" he sat up, and I noticed he had no shirt on. This normally wouldn't bother me but lately...

"Did you mean what you said last night?" he interrupted my thoughts

"What?" I was confused and embarrassed enough. What did I do now?

"About my eyes. You said they were beautiful." He said this in his soft, only for me voice. He didn't talk to anyone else like that and I sometimes wondered why. I wasn't that special really, I had fiery red hair and green eyes that my mom used to make me hide, hence the goggles. That was before she got sick. Now it's just a habit. If I'm around lots of people, the goggles go on. I'm pretty smart I guess; the third smartest in Wammy's. I had a knack for video games and computers. I was pretty tall, taller than Mello. But I was a geek. I wasn't very attractive. Mello was perfect. He was like an angel. He was smart, and beautiful, and he could make anyone do anything he wanted. So why did he speak to me like that?

"I- I was- That is- I- Yes. Yes I meant it. I didn't mean to say it out loud though and if it made you mad or freaked you out I'm sorry we can forget it happened I was just tired and it spilled out I didn't mean to I'm sorry!" I said this all in a rush and hung my head after, pulling myself into my ball again. I felt Mello lean closer and braced myself for the yelling, hitting, anything. But he surprised me, making me freeze, by touching my hair. He took a lock of it and ran his fingers down it, then twirled it gently around his fingers. His fingers met my chin and he held my face up, looking into my eyes.

"You have beautiful eyes too." He said gently, brushing a finger across my cheekbone. I just stared at him. We sat there for a moment, his fingertips against my skin. Finally, he broke the silence with, "Breakfast time!" and he stood up, going to find a shirt. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in, reaching up to touch my face where his fingers had been.

You're probably wondering what I had decided last night. I had actually decided two things that went with each other. One: I was gay. Two: I was in love with Mello. As we sat down for breakfast it was obvious to me how much I loved him. Everything about him, the way he glared around at people with his blue eyes, how his expression changed when he looked at me, turned almost soft, gentle. That didn't last long though.

"I swear to god Matt, if you don't stop staring at me I'm going to kill you!" I blushed and looked down, mumbling,

"Sorry." He was silent for a minute.

"What's with you, Matty? You've been weird lately."

"Nothing's 'with me', I'm fine." I moved my food around with my fork, no longer hungry. Mello nudged my leg with his foot under the table, doing weird things to my body.

"Matty, you can talk to me." He said so quietly I could barely hear him. I looked up into his eyes, imagining myself above him, panting, sweet sensations running through my body as I- _No! _A deep blush took over my face at my little fantasy. _No, no, no, no, no, we do not want to fuck our friends! Or make them moan... Pin them down and kiss every inch of their bodies... NO! God damn it! _His worried stare bore into me like my mother's broken eyes the night my father left us. Pain and confusion swirled around my brain. _What's with me?_

"I- I need to- Get some..." _Excuse, excuse... come on, genius! _"Homework..." I stood and threw out all my food, then ran off to our room, shutting myself in the bathroom. We had no lock on the door, for it got broken once when Mello slammed the door during one of his temper tantrums.

Sometimes when I thought about my mother, I went into a state where I do anything to stop thinking about her. Usually, gaming helped, but I couldn't do that in case Mello came in. And I didn't really have the balls to talk to him about my... sexuality yet. What can I do? I thought. I noticed the razor Mel kept in the bathroom in case one of us finally had a reason to use it. So far, no luck, but I had thought of other things for it. I pulled up the sleeve of my striped shirt, finding a clear spot on my arm. There were so many cuts already that I had trouble, but I could manage.

I took the razor apart, taking out one of the small individual razors and brought the blade to my wrist. I cut across once, watching the blood bead up a bit. Some relief went through me, but it wasn't enough. I had to punish myself. I had to make it go away. I took a deep breath and cut under the first one, then again under the second, adding to the line of neat cuts across my wrist, when Mello threw the door open suddenly, startling me.

"Mello..." he was staring at me, pure horror and sadness on his face.

"M-Matt?" I dropped the razor and pulled my sleeve over my arm.

"I was just-"

"Matt Jeevas, don't you ever even THINK ABOUT HURTING YOURSELF LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN! _WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT MATTY?" _He screamed at me, making me curl in on myself, a light, throbbing pain stabbing at my wrist. I shrunk away from him as he crouched down, taking my arm in his hand. I was loose, a ragdoll. He whispered, "What could be hurting you inside so bad that you have to do this?" I sniffed a bit, fighting tears. I was always the one crying, always the weak one. "Hey, Matt? What could be so bad? Please, tell me. Tell me anything. Tell me all your dirtiest, saddest, most disturbing thoughts! I don't care! Just never, _ever _do that again, do you hear me?" My breathing grew ragged from the effort. I couldn't do it. I couldn't put all that on him. "Matt." I shook my head. "_Mail._" I looked up at him, wide eyed. He never called me that. I only told him my real name so he would know I trusted him. That's how we became true friends. I guess that's how I fell in love with him. My voice sounded rough when I spoke.

"I- I can't. I can't put that on you. You're all I have. I don't want to lose you, Mihael." His mouth opened a bit. He sighed softly.

"Why did you- Why did you... Cut yourself?"

"I had to do something. It's all my fault, everything is my fault. I'm bad luck, and now I've made everything worse!" I stared up at him, tears suddenly gone. "You should kill me."

"HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?" Mello exploded, shock taking over him entirely. "I would never do that! And how did you make it worse?" I hung my head.

"I'm bad." I whispered.

"Because of this?" Mello picked up my arm again.

"Yes... and something else."

"What? Tell me Matty!" I slowly looked up at him, taking off my goggles.

"Well, the thing is..." I paused, staring at him. This could be the last time I get to look him in the eyes.

"I love you..."


	4. Baby Loves You

**Sorry for the wait, guys. Had to work 11 hours last night. Urg. But anywho, here ya go!**

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><p>He was staring at me. I stared back. His lips were lightly parted, eyes wide.<p>

"You... you do?" I gently took my arm back and pulled my sleeve over my hand, holding the end of it tightly in my fist. I nodded, looking down. I slid off the ground and walked to the sink, running water over my forearm and hissing at the sharp pain that went through me. It was good though, I deserved it... "Hurts, doesn't it asshole?" asked Mello from the doorway. His voice was off, not quite as strong as it usually was. I looked over at him, watching as his breath caught and he sighed, leaning against the wall beside the sink. He bit into a chocolate bar, his stress-reliever. _Where the hell did he get that?_

"I'm sorry I put you through this. I can move to another room if you want." I mumbled. He gave me a weird look.

"What are you talking about? You're my best friend Matt." I was confused.

"But I'm-"

"I don't care if you're gay. You're still Matt. And besides-" he stepped a little closer and turned off the water, holding his chocolate in his mouth and running a towel across my arm. We watched together as blood stained the towel, my eyes with no emotion, his only filled with sadness. He placed the towel on the sink and took the chocolate out of his mouth, placing it beside the towel. "I need to figure a few things out myself." He whispered, looking into my eyes. We stared at each other, until Mello suddenly put his arms around my waist, hiding his face against my chest. "What the _fuck _Matt? Why would you fucking do that? You scared the shit out of me." Hesitantly, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

"I'm sorry."

"Jesus, Matt." He moved to look at my eyes again, smirking a bit. "Didn't you remember that I'm supposed to die first?"

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><p>"<em>Mail, Mommy loves you Mail."Mommy was crouched in front of me, holding my shoulders. Her hair was like mine, but her eyes were different. They were brown.<em>

"_M-mommy?" _

"_Hey, baby. How's my baby? Sorry Mommy was gone so long." She was talking slow, her voice rich and comforting, like Mommies are supposed to be._

"_Where's Daddy? He's gonna be mad that I woke you up."_

"_No, no." Laughed Mommy. "Today is just for you and me, Mail." She stroked my hair. "Mommy loves you, baby. Mommy loves you." Her voice turned all distorted and her face began to melt. Fear gripped at my heart._

"_You're not my Mommy!" I shouted._

"_But Mail," its voice was deep and wrong, sending shivers down my spine. "Mommy loves you." I screamed as its eyes plopped out of its head, mouth hanging open, bones cracking like mine did when Daddy threw me against the wall. It's hard, cold, inhuman fingers gripped at my skin, stinging me._

"_No! NO!"_

My eyes shot open. I was in bed. I was safe. I looked over and Mello was in his bed, facing me, sleeping peacefully. I sighed in relief and flipped onto my back, closing my eyes. It was silent for a moment, and then someone whispered right into my ear...

"_Mommy loves you."_

"AH!" I sat up in bed, nearly falling out, but someone grabbed the back of my shirt and tugged, pulling me to them and wrapping their arms around me.

"Shh. It's okay Matt." Murmured... Mello? "I've got you." He stroked a hand through my hair and down my neck, running it down my shoulder and waist until he had his arms around me again.

"M-Mello?" I whispered, just to make sure.

"Mmm...?" he mumbled back. I leaned against him, closing my eyes, relaxing.

"I love you, Mihael." I froze, realising what had just come out of my mouth. He tightened his arms, hugging me softly.

"I love you too Mail." He whispered, burying his face against the back of my neck. "Go to sleep, Angel." I smiled to myself, relaxing once again, and fell asleep with Mello's heart beating against my back.


	5. Getting Used To Me

**Sorry for the long wait guys.** **:P Yaoi in the next chapter, I promise :3**_  
><em>

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><p><em>Damn. That was one creepy ass nightmare last night. Mommy loves you! Ugh. Wonder why I never dream about my dad. He was the scariest mother fucker I ever met. So why am I always dreaming about my mom?<em>

I kept my eyes closed for a moment, trying to untangle reality from my dreams. I had always been a vivid dreamer, and now I couldn't tell... _Go to sleep Angel. _Was that really Mello? I opened my eyes and stared at the wall. _I might as well get up. _I thought. I started to move, but something around my waist was holding me still. I turned my head and found a sleeping Mello still holding on to me. My heart almost jumped out of my chest, and I flipped onto my other side, causing him to make and adorable face and lay against my chest. I felt dizzy. _Maybe it was real..._

I lay there until he woke up, playing with his long, shaggy hair. It was really soft, and it smelled amazing. I rested my head against his, smiling to myself. Soon, he made a soft sleepy noise and cuddled closer, looking up at me with tired blue eyes.

"Good morning." I said nervously. He smiled.

"You're so cute, Matty. Can you go get me some breakfast? I'm starving and not alive yet."

"S-sure." No one had ever called me cute before. I got out of bed and got dressed, aware of Mello's eyes on me as I took off my clothes. I wasn't really bothered by it, but I hurried to cover up my wrist before he was reminded. I leaned over him and kissed his forehead quickly before I left. He stared at me, wide-eyed, but I left before he could say anything.

_Hmm. What does Mello want for breakfast? Bacon? Lol nope, I want some though. Ooh, chocolate cereal. And chocolate milk. Crazy bastard, he's gonna get diabetes or something. Wait, that would suck. Don't get diabetes! _My thoughts were random and scattered as I went through the buffet at Wammy's. I ate a piece of bacon and drank a glass of juice, but couldn't get anything else down because of the butterflies occupying my stomach. I brought Mello's food with me and placed it on the bedside table beside him. He ate his food, bouncing a bit, which was something he never did. He ate a bit of a chocolate bar before lying down again, looking at me.

"Hey." I whispered. He patted the bed beside him and I slid in, my denim-clad legs rubbing against his pyjama-d ones. He put his arms around my neck and moved closer, my stomach touching his.

"Hey." He said softly, and brought his lips to mine. I almost fell out of bed.

He kissed me softly, just lips on lips, his breath tasting like chocolate and Mello. I shivered with the feel of it, the warmth and softness that was his mouth. When he pulled away, he stayed close, his eyes heavy and dreamy. He opened his mouth to say something, but we jumped as someone knocked on the door. He huffed and I got out of bed, shaking my hair in front of my face and pulling on my goggles. I didn't say anything as I opened the door.

"Hello Matt." Rodger greeted me warmly, laying a hand on my shoulder. "Good morning Mello."

"Hey, Rodg." Mello's voice came from right beside me, startling me a bit.

"Just came to tell you two that there are no classes tomorrow as we are celebrating Watari's birthday."

"Oh, cool. How old is that geezer anyways?"

"Now Mello, be respectful. I can't tell you anyways. Watari's wishes."

"Sure sure. Get goin'. We're doing homework." Mello waved Rodger away and closed the door behind him. Then he pushed me against the door and attacked me with his mouth.

He caught my parted lips with his, kissing me deeply. I felt my face flame up, and I brought my hands to his hair, stroking my fingers through it. He pulled away fro a moment, taking my breath with him, and pulled my goggles off my face.

"I like seeing your eyes." he explained. I leaned down and kissed just in front of his ear, then whispered,

"I love you." he shivered, then kissed me again.

"You're different now. More talkative. Are you okay?" I nodded.

"You don't know how happy I am. I can be real now." He held my arm and pulled back my sleeve. My heart sank as he trailed his fingers along my scars.

"Happy enough to never do this again?"

"If it's what you want, Mello, I'll never even think about it." He stared at me for a moment, brought my wrist to his mouth and kissed it, making warmth shoot through me wherever his lips touched me.

"Why did you do it, Matty?"

"It's my fault Mello. Everything is my fault. I always fuck everything up." I looked down.

"Who would tell you something like that?"

"Dad said it all the time. And he's right. I have to make myself feel the pain I've put on everyone else." I sighed. "He used to do it for me, but since he's not here, I have to do it." Mello held my face and made me look at him.

"Your father was a bastard if he could do that to you. You don't fuck everything up! You've made my life better! Never hurt yourself like that again, you hear me? If you need to be hurt, I'll do it, okay?" he smiled. "That was a joke, by the way." I sort of grinned, wrapping my arms around him.

"I love you."

"Yeah, yeah. Get off me you fag." he joked, leaning down to kiss me quickly. "Time for homework." We got into our usual working positions, me on the floor and him of the couch. "Hey Matt?"

"Mm-hmm?" he leaned over me and kissed me softly.

"I love you."

"Sure, sure. Do your work." I pulled him in for one more kiss, then we settled down to work.

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><p><strong>Fluffy! Love ya guys! Thanks for all the review, by the way, they make me happy! :)<strong>


	6. Author Note Sorry Guys!

God, guys I'm really sorry I haven't been uploading lately. Exams killed me, and I've had some other personal stuff that you guys won't care about but Ima tell you anyways. :P

I recently came out as Bi to my friends and my mom. Tough shit lol X_X BUT I'M BAAAAACK!

So without further adieu, I present...

MORE MATTY AND MELLY BEING DELICIOUS!

(Go to the next chapter now. I've named it awesomely.)

Sorry for making you wait!


	7. Making Love With My Angel

**Get ready for yaoi and fluff! Love you guys 3 Mwa!**

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><p>"WAKE UP MATTY!" I jumped and fell out of bed onto my back.<p>

"Mother fucker!" I moaned in pain. "What happened? What's wrong?" Mello poked his head over the edge of my bed.

"It's your birthday stupid!" he slid off the bed and onto me, putting his fingers in my hair and kissing me seductively.

"Mm, not that I don't… Appreciate this… But this position… Is really awkward." I murmured between kisses.

"Always so picky, babe." Mello rolled off me and walked away, letting me stare at his ass. "I got a really good present for you." That got me off the floor and across the room in two seconds flat.

It had been two years since Mello and I were together, and we were now comfortable with all the things that came with that. Being gay, having to knock the shit out of people who made fun of us (Mello did that more than I did. Okay, I didn't do it. But Mels was HOT when he was angry.), and all the other bits and pieces, such as sexual activities.

Mello and I have never had sex. We've groped and sucked each other off before, but we've never had full on inside each other sex. Now that we were both sixteen, I guess we had no excuse other than the fact that we were scared. We knew each other's bodies. We knew what turned us off and we knew what made us harder than diamonds. We knew every curve, every muscle, every inch of skin that belonged to us. But we were nervous. Of what? I'm not quite sure. But I didn't want to do it wrong, make it hurt instead of feel good, and I didn't want to scare him away.

I crawled onto the couch and rested my head on his lap.

"What'd you get me?" I asked.

"I can't tell you." I looked up at him with my puppy eyes on, making him sigh. "What do you want for your birthday?" he asked while stroking my hair.

"You." I answered automatically. He laughed.

"Nope." I pouted.

"Why not? I'll take good care of you." He smiled and touched my face.

"You already have me, you silly, sexy boy." This led to a make-out session, which led to us being late for class. When our day is done, Mello and I collect our food then go to our room to eat so we can avoid the other kids. There's this one girl named Linda that follows me around and tries to get my goggles off all the time. It's really annoying. But Mello likes beating her off of me. She trailed me right to our room, and Mello came out to yell at her so she would leave.

"I swear, Matt, women are like cats in heat when they're around you!" He grumbled as he threw himself on the couch. I bit my lip, standing by the door while still holding my food.

"I'm sorry." He looked up at me and softened.

"Hey, forget about it. You can't help how fucking sexy you are. Come here." I sat with him and put my food on the floor. He put an arm around me and kissed me softly. "Just as long as you remember you're mine." He whispered in my ear. I shivered and he laughed quietly.

Soon, I found myself in bed with my Mello, half-naked, with his sweet tongue in my mouth. He ran a hand down my bare chest and I gasped.

"Mel…"

"Mm-hmm?" he brushed a hand across my hips. I moaned. "Hey, why are you shaking?" He lifted himself off of me. "I won't hurt you, Mail." He kissed down my neck, then rolled over suddenly, pulling me on top of him. "Want to unwrap your present?" he asked. I nearly died.

"Yes." I said nervously. He closed his eyes and held his arms above his head. I leaned over him and whispered in his ear, letting my lips brush against his skin, "You're so sexy." He grinned. I slipped my hands under his shirt and ran my fingertips along his body while kissing down the side of his neck. His breathing grew uneven as I pulled off his shirt and traced the soft lines of his muscles with my tongue. I carefully took off the black jeans he was wearing, brushing my hands against his legs, trying to make my hands stop shaking.

"Mm… Matt." He lay under me, in nothing but his boxers, looking tempting and yummy. I moved so my face was above his and I was straddling him. When I held myself up, it hid the shaking in my hands. Mello reached up and ran his fingers through my hair, down my neck and shoulders and down my waist, stopping at my belt. I closed my eyes and sighed, then opened them when I felt his hands working at my belt.

"W-what are you doing Melly?" He looked up at me with a hot look, a look that set my whole body on fire.

"For your birthday, I want to make love with you." My breath caught for a moment, and he pulled me down so we were pressed together, just us. Just Mello and me.

"I'm scared." I said gently, resting my face against his chest. I could hear his heart beating, and it made me feel better.

"I won't hurt you, Mail." He said again.

"I know. I just don't want to hurt you." He pulled off my jeans and touched my thighs, brushing his fingers so softly I almost didn't feel it. He caught my lips with his and kissed me, getting hot with it, biting my lip and putting his tongue in my mouth when I gasped. Our tongues rubbed together, breaths mingling, while he carefully started touching me between my legs. I moaned into our kiss, moving my hips closer. He slid down, trailing hot kisses down my stomach and took me into his mouth. I squirmed and panted and groaned when I came close. "Ah, Mels… I'm so close!" I moaned in frustration when he pulled away. He took off my boxers and his own and got on top of me, fondling my hard-on while positioning himself at my entrance.

"Tell me if you need me to go slower." He panted. I nodded. He sucked on two of his fingers, moving his tongue around them while staring at me and turning me on more. He gently probed me with one finger, something he had done before. When he added another finger, it started hurting a bit, and then when he started scissoring me I arched my back and hissed in pain. "Sorry baby."

"No, it's okay. Keep going." He carefully added a third finger and started moving them in and out. I tried to relax, and I nearly fainted when his fingers brushed a certain spot inside me. I moaned and said, "Holy hell. Mihael…"

"Must've done something right." He laughed. He pushed against that spot, and I started panting. He took away his fingers (I bitched about it a bit until he shushed me.) At first, when he slid in, it hurt like hell, but eventually he hit that spot again and I spread my legs so it was easier. He started thrusting, going faster, harder, moaning my name and complimenting me. "Mm, Mail. Oh, you're so good… so tight."

"Ha-ah Mihael…" I panted, gripping his shoulders. "More!" He groaned and bit at my neck, pushing harder against my spot. "OHMYGODMIHAEL!" I screamed in pure pleasure. He laughed and moaned softly.

"Oh yeah, I'm doing this right. Holy fuck you feel incredible." He thrusted faster, and I tangled my hands in his hair, arching my back and pushing my hips closer to take in more of him.

"Mihael, I'm gonna- Ohh yes! I'm gonna-"

"Me too baby just keep- ah- keep moaning like that." I obeyed, throwing my head back and screaming out loud,

"OH GOD YES! OHH MORE! HARDER, HARDER YES! MIHAEL!" I pulled him even closer, pressing him desperately into my prostate.

"Oh my fucking god, MAIL, YES!" He shouted. I felt him come inside of me, pushing me over the edge. I came all over our stomachs without a single touch to my hot erection. We rode out our pleasure; lay still to catch our breath, and then Mello pulled out of me, still panting. "Whoa. That was amazing." He whispered, his breath leaving tingles on my chest.

"Thank you Melly. That was the best present ever." He smiled and pulled me into his arms, kissing my face slowly and softly.

"I love you so much, Mail. You know that, right? I'll always love you." My heart stuttered in my chest.

"I love you too, Mihael." He held me in his arms, his breathing slowing and becoming even as he fell asleep. I moved up so my face was even with his and kissed him softly. "You're my angel."


	8. Fire And Ice

**Hey guys! **

**Quick update, and this is me experimenting with a soft Mello. **

**Next chapter is gonna be funny XD **

**Peace out bitches!**

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><p>Yeah, I'm a bitch.<p>

I know I'm not the nicest person in the world. I know I'm kinda mean to Matt. I know I'm terrible to Near (difference is, I don't regret that). I like to think I'm made of ice. I'm hard and cold and no one can break through me.

Well if I'm ice, then Matt is fire.

When I'm angry, when my icy cold wall is thrown up in front of me and no one can touch me, Matt can just reach his warm hands in and warm me up. He makes me laugh, he makes me smile. Even when he's not with me, he makes me smile. He's my fire, my warmth, my light. Sometimes I feel better just when I look at him.

So when I woke up in the middle of the night and my Matty was lying in my arms, his fiery red hair all tousled and messy, his lips parted slightly, soft breaths trailing across my skin, his cheeks still slightly flushed. When I looked at him, really looked at him, and he pressed closer to me, humming gently in his sleep, murmuring my name in his warm, rich, amazingly incredible voice, I nearly started crying.

_This is mine. He is mine._

I didn't even have to claim him as mine to know it. And even if he didn't know he was mine, he still would be, because everything about him, from the light, barely-there freckles on his cheeks to the harsh, angry scars that his father gave him made me love him so much more.

I pulled him closer to me, nuzzled my face into is soft, sweet-smelling hair, feeling a sudden fierce protectiveness over him. He's had so much hurt in his life already, with his parents and his... cutting. I suddenly felt the need to keep him safe, keep him soft and protected, like my Matty was. I kissed his head and wrapped my fingers tenderly in his hair.

"I love you Matty." I whispered. "No one will ever hurt you again." Matt stirred a bit, wrapping his arms around my waist. He tucked his head against my chest and sighed,

"Melly..." My heart swelled in happiness. I stroked his hair, looking at each strand as a separate part of Matt.

"I promise..."

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><p><strong>Oh, and reviewer Michel Keehl (you know who you are) Why shouldn't you have read it? I'm sorry!<strong>

**I'd like to give a good shoutout to Mail JeevasXMiheal Keehl, brightnight003, lawlietlivesforever, Rinka Kagamine, AngelKitty135, Explaoding albino potato, wishingbell and all you other gorgeous people, as well as the first reviewer, Kira Yokai! I love all your comments, they make me so happy :3 Thanks guys!**


	9. Fresh Feelings

**Hey guys. It's been a while again, I'm sorry. But here's more fluff and lemons (Just a bit) and some Neary in there too! Have fun!**

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><p>I was never one for bright lights. Sometimes, the sun gets on my nerves. I opened my eyes and looked up.<p>

Sun, I love you.

Mello was still asleep, his arms loose around my shoulders, one hand still in my hair. His chest rose and fell softly with each calm breath he took, his breathing moving strands of my hair a bit, tickling me. The morning sun shining on him made his hair look like it was made of gold; his skin looked so enticingly soft that I had to run my lips across his collarbone. I just had to. It was a physical need. Our blankets had fallen down, only covering from our hips down. I could see every line of his gorgeous torso, so long nd lean and strong that I cuddled closer just because I could.

He looked so relaxed and peaceful and terrifyingly young that I could picture him as he was when he was ten, tucking a stray piece of hair behind his ear, turning the page of his book, lying on his stomach with his ankles crossed in the air. I could see him looking up at me, smiling brightly, his blue eyes just barely showing sadness, asking me...

"_Hey Matt, wanna hear a story?" I nodded shyly, and Mello sat up, patting the bed beside him. I crawled beside him and crossed my legs, hiding in my hair. "Once upon a time," he started,_

"_There was a boy with blonde hair and blue eyes. He lived with his mama and his daddy and his three older brothers in a big beautiful house just off the country. Close your eyes and imagine it. Can you see it?" I did as he told me, and yes, I could see it. I nodded. "Good. Now, The Boy's mama loved all of her boys, but she loved her youngest the most. He was so pretty to her, so young and full of life. _

"_The Boy's mama was dying. Not in the way yours was, Matt, but in a different way. The Boy's daddy loved another woman, and The Boy's mama was dying inside, in her heart. She didn't smile anymore, not even at her pretty little boy. One day, she made a plan. A way to make all of her sons and her husband hers. _

"_Before she continued with her plan, she told The Boy to leave, go out and buy some sweets at a candy shop in town. She didn't want her beautiful boy to be ruined. In her sick and withering state, she locked all the doors and windows, and she burned her family alive. All except that pretty boy and his bag of sweets." When Mello finished talking, he smiled at me again and touched my head. "Don't look so sad; the story's not done yet."_

"_The Boy blamed himself for his mama's death. He thought that if he wasn't born, he wouldn't have dragged his family into their death. But The Boy was smart, and they didn't send him to an ordinary place for orphan children. He came to Wammy's._

"_Soon, The Boy met another boy with red hair and green eyes named Matt. Matt made The Boy happy. Now, The Boy can't remember being sad at all." He grinned happily and ruffled my hair. "The boy is me, Matt. You make me happy."_

I smiled and stroked a hand down Mello's stomach, making him shiver. I moved up and kissed right in front of his ear, whispering,

"Wake up, beautiful." He moaned sleepily, sending delightful shivers down my spine. I kissed along his jawbone and softly licked across his lips. "Come on, Mels. It's late." That was true. It was almost noon.

"Don't- Mmfh- Wanna." He mumbled cutely, half-opening his eyes and pouting sexily at me. I kissed his pouty lips and untangled myself from him, getting out of bed. "Nooo!" he protested softly. I stood with my hands on my hips, raising my eyebrows at him. "Mm actually, just stay like that and life is good." I rolled my eyes and went to find clothing. "Nice ass!" Mello called in his sexy morning voice.

"Thanks babe!" I jokingly smacked my ass and Mello laughed so hard he fell out of bed. He came across the room just as I put on my boxers, wrapping his arms and our blanket around us.

"Please come back to bed, Matty." He kissed my shoulder and nipped me lightly, making that familiar heat start low in my stomach.

"Don't turn me on, I need to study today." I insisted half-heartedly. He grumbled quietly.

"Fine, be a good student." He grabbed my ass, making me jump and yelp. He laughed like a child. "Tonight your ass is mine." He whispered in a low, possessive voice. It made me shiver. Then, he left me alone to get dressed.

It was a Friday, but it was a study day, so I got out some books and went over everything even though I already knew it by heart. I looked up a few times and found Mello staring at me. Finally, I threw a ball of paper at him and said,

"What? Don't make your sex-eyes at me!" he giggled and lobbed the paper back at me.

"I'm not making sex-eyes. I just-" he sighed and came over to me, pushing my books off my lap and pulling off my goggles. "I'm just so amazed. This is my life. And I get to be with you for the rest of it. I'm just so happy." He held my face as he spoke, smiling a soft, warm smile. It spread to my face, and soon we were just staring at each other, smiling like idiots, and not caring because we were so in love that it was acceptable.

Around dinnertime we were dying of starvation so we went to the Dining Hall for food. While I was stuffing my face and Mello was pretending not to (always so graceful, my love), Near came up to us and Mello immediately slouched in his seat, glaring fiercely at Near. I stopped eating like a dog and picked at my food, looking at Near through my hair. For some reason, Near always made me nervous. He was always so emotionless, never getting angry or sad or happy. It scared me.

"I would like to request that Mello and Matt engage in sexual activities quietly in the future." He said in his monotone voice. I felt my face heat up like a cheap light bulb and I hid in my hair, looking at the ground. Mello burst out laughing, then stopped abruptly.

"Actually, Near, we _were _being quiet. I intend on making Matt scream every single night we're here." He said this very seriously, in his no-negotiations voice. I held my head in my hands. _I'm going to die. I'm seriously going to die right now._

"I cannot sleep when you two are being so loud."

"Why? Does it turn you on too much? Make you want to join us, little sheep? Sorry sweetheart, but you're not allowed. You can't have any of _this_." I felt Mello shifting in his seat. "And Matt's all mine, bitch. Now get lost and leave our sex life alone." Near shuffled off and I stabbed my fork through the last piece of broccoli on my plate.

"That's okay, I was done eating." I said quietly.

"I've lost my appetite too." Grumbled Mello. I touched his knee under the table and leaned forward, whispering,

"But I would enjoy having something else in my mouth." I slid my hand up his thigh and then took it away. He looked at me and grinned.

"Fucking tease. You naughty boy, Matty. Talking dirty at the table. How could you?" I smiled and said,

"Who said I was talking dirty? I could mean anything with that sentence."

"Yeah, but _I _mean that you're going to suck me when we get to our room and then I'm going to keep my promise to Near and make you scream. Now let's go." He stood up and left what was on his plate on the table with my leftovers. He took my hand as we walked to our room, lacing his fingers through mine. I felt a jolt go through me at his touch. He looked back at me and smiled. God, he was beautiful.

That night, as we made love for the second time, he held me close to him and kept his head against my neck, thrusting as though we were in slow motion. I made sure we kept our promise. The louder I got, the harder he got. He looked into my eyes and whispered my name as we came. Then we lay beside each other, tangled, our pants filling the air while Mello took me into his arms. He ran his hands through my hair and whispered,

"I. Love. You. So. Much." He paused between each word to kiss a different part of my face, my forehead, eyes, nose and lips. I giggled softly, then blushed cause I sounded like a girl. "And that was adorable." I scrunched my nose, making him smile.

"Sorry." I kissed him before he could comment and murmured, "I love you too. You're everything to me, you know that?" he smiled.

"I'll never leave you, Mail. I'll always be here for you."

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><p><strong>Yeah sorry that's it. If you don't want a sad chapter, skip the next two. Sorry my writing is so depressing lol XD<strong>

**Love you guys!**


	10. Feeling Nothing

_Alright, so how did I get here?_

I was walking down a street in the Kanto region of Japan (not sure where, stopped caring really), pulling my furry vest closer to keep warm. It was raining, of course. The whole world just had to be against me right now. I pinched the sleeves of my striped shirt to keep them low. I haven't worn short sleeves since he left. I believe that was four years ago. He had told me he would never leave, and then he completely ditches me for some random case I had barely heard of. I think it was that Kira case. L had died because of it, and there was no successor chosen. Mello left, leaving me with a simple note that said,

_It's the only way._

_ -M_

The only way for _what_? The only way to break my heart? I thought I was sad when my mother died, but when Mello left me it felt like I had died. I officially lost maybe fifty pounds, probably more, and I looked almost anorexic. I had lost my appetite. Eating meals was something I had always done with Mello. I could barely stand to play my games. I had lost that part of me too. Most days I just did my work silently, staying away from everyone, wanting nothing but my angel back.

Oh, and my cutting? Well let's say it increased sevenfold. I ran out of room on my wrists and used my stomach and hips and legs, waiting for my arms to heal, then used them again. It was a cycle, a repetition, the only stability in my life. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't talk, I couldn't do anything but make myself hurt. I felt empty.

So how, you may ask, did I get from Wammy's in England to Japan?

Well, I decided to track Mello. He deserved to know what was going on. I knew I was pathetic and weak for doing this to myself, but I couldn't help it. Mello was the only thing that kept me alive. If I was going to kill myself, I may as well cut off my ties with my last life line. And I was close to finding him. I had narrowed him down to one hotel (he was on the move a lot). He hated being close to the ground, so he'd probably pick a room on one of the higher levels, and he always complained about our small room, so he'd want something fancy. I asked the receptionist about the most expensive room, and she seemed sympathetic when I told her my best friend who was having a hard time was staying there. She even gave me an extra card so I could get in as I pleased. I entered his room and found it empty of life. I could tell it was his room by the way it smelled, of chocolate and leather. He had always wanted leather pants. I wondered if he had a pair now. I didn't look through his things; I just sat myself on his bed and waited.

_**Three Hours Later…**_

"Mother of shit!" Mello swore softly as he opened the door to his room and dropped something. My heart decided to stop working and then go on a marathon. He stepped into the kitchen, giving me a quick view of his back. Had he gotten taller? He slipped into the bathroom for a second, washing his hands, and came back out, ruffling his hair and whistling. He froze mid-step when he saw me, stopping his whistling, his expression turning to genuine shock as he stared at me. He was just as beautiful as before, his eyes were the same, his hair just a bit longer and shaggier. He had a huge scar covering half his face and I could see it ran down to his arm and hip too. He wore a black leather vest and leather pants. His lips were parted and his shockingly blue eyes were wide. "Mail?" he asked, disbelieving. I stared back at him, but didn't stand. My legs would have given out on me. I greeted him in my newly achieved monotone,

"Hello Mihael."

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><p><strong>Okay, skip the next one if you don't like sadness.<strong>

**Sorry it's so short!**


	11. Skeleton Love

**Hey! Lots of emotion, so get ready Ladies/Gentlemen!**

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><p>"But- But I- You were…" he covered his mouth with his hand as he looked at me, <em>really<em> looked at me, and I saw tears in his eyes. Mello never, _ever_ cried. "What happened to you?" his voice was husky.

"You left." He flinched and ran his hands through his hair, looking down. "I'm here to tell you that I'm going to be dead tomorrow." His head snapped up, his eyes even wider.

"W-what? WHY?" He exclaimed, stumbling towards me a bit. I lifted my chin, attempting to look powerful.

"I don't want to live anymore. So tomorrow, I'm going to kill myself. I just thought you would want to know." Mello looked completely distraught, and he blinked a few times, tears rolling down his face.

"But- why?" he looked into my eyes, moving closer to take my goggles off. He touched my face, tracing my cheekbones and collarbone. "You're so thin… What did you do Matty?"

"Don't call me that." For the first time in a long time, my voice had emotion, even if it was just exhaustion. I weakly pushed his hand away, but I barely had any effect on him. Something clicked in his head, and his voice took on a more desperate tone.

"Wait, you're going to kill yourself? You can't do that Matt! You can't!" And in that moment, with all the emotion in Mello's eyes, with the tears streaking his face, with all the hurt I had bottled up for four years, and with the sheer impossibility of being _here, _with him, I broke. I stood, shoving him away, and stormed as forcefully as I could to the nearest table, screaming,

"DON'T YOU GET IT?" I started panting from the physical effort it took to be that loud, but I had to be that loud. He had to hear me God damn it! "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND? YOU TORE ME APART! YOU BROKE ME MELLO! FUCKING HELL, I'VE NEVER BEEN SO ALONE IN MY LIFE! EVERYTHING, AND I MEAN _EVERYTHING _I DID REMINDED ME OF YOU! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURT? DID YOU KNOW THAT I CAN'T DO _ANYTHING_ WITHOUT WANTING TO CUT NOW?" he flinched again at those words, his eyes flicking to my wrists. I staggered overt to him, tired now, but full of adrenaline. I held out my wrists, still hidden by my shirt and shouted, "I'VE NEVER HURT SO MUCH IN MY LIFE AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU! HOW DID YOU EXPECT ME TO GO ON? DID YOU REALLY THINK A TINY LITTLE NOTE SAYING "Oh, it was the only way, boo hoo!" COULD MAKE IT BETTER?" I looked away and allowed myself some time to sob. Once I could talk again, I turned on him, wiping my tears and pointed a bony finger at him. "IT DIDN'T! It didn't fix anything!" He was gasping, trying to get control of his sobs.

"But- I thought you would move on, get someone else, someone better. You could have had anyone, Matt. Anyone would have wanted you. You could have done Near if you wanted to! Maybe even get into girls…" I laughed without humor.

"For someone so smart, you really can be clueless. Don't you see? I still love you." He was covering his mouth again, crying freely. Seeing him like that made me break into tears again, but I had to get it straight. He needed to know. "I still love you! And I'll always love you, even after it's done. Even when I finally end this. Even when the sun gets too close to Earth, billions of years from now, and the whole world gets obliterated, I will _still_ love you, Mihael Keehl." He took his hand away and whimpered,

"M-matty…"

"But I guess that's not enough anymore, huh? 'I love you' won't cut it, because you don't love me back." I turned, ready to leave, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me back. I fell against him easily, being so light, and Mello took me in his arms gently, stroking my hair like he used to. "Mello…?" he was sobbing, actually sobbing, with the noises and everything, as he held me.

"God, Matt, I'll explain everything. I promise. Right here, right now." He breathed deeply for a moment, and continued talking, his voice low and breathy in my ear. "I'm in the Mafia. I'm pretty much the leader." I pulled away to look at him, surprised. "It was a good way to know everything. Anyways, I left you behind because I didn't want you to get hurt-" his voice cracked and he held my face again. "But that obviously didn't work." He caught his breath. "I had my bags packed-" we looked over at the suitcase on his bed. "because I was coming back to get you. I missed you so much Matty. I never forgot you." He took his hands away and un-zipped his vest, reaching into a small pocket hidden inside. "I always had something to remember you by." He pulled out a piece of paper and handed it to me. It was a picture we had taken with a cheap thow-away camera of me and him on our bed. He was shirtless, and I was snuggled up to him, holding the camera. He was flipping the camera off, sticking his tongue out, and I was laughing. We looked so happy. The photo brought back memories, and I smiled faintly, my first smile in four years. We had bought the camera and spent the day taking pictures of each other in ridiculous poses, trying to be models. I looked up at him, my chest hurting.

"You still have this? And you carry it around with you?" I asked, holding the picture up. He smiled, relieved, and wrapped his arms around my barely-there waist.

"I would never have it anywhere else." He pulled me closer, looking up so we were face-to-face. "I love you, Mail Jeevas. I never stopped loving you. I shouldn't have left you, baby. I'm so, so, so sorry. Will you ever forgive me?" I leaned down and burrowed my face against his chest, breathing in the scent of him, of my Mello.

"Of course. I'm sorry for yelling. I never really blamed you, I was just weak."

"I shouldn't have done that to you. It was better that you got it all out." He pulled away and held my face again, looking at me. "You really need to gain some weight. You look like a skeleton." I smiled at him, just barely, and asked in a whisper,

"Does the skeleton get a kiss?" he smiled back, warm and full of love.

And the skeleton got a kiss.

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><p><strong>Back to fluff next chapter, no more depressing stuff, I promise! <strong>

**Mello POV next too! I like being Mello sometimes. :3**


	12. Yellow

**Hey y'all (that was weird, sorry) **

**Kay, so the song used is Yellow by Coldplay and I DO NOT own it or any of the characters in this Fanfiction**

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><p>We slept together that night, not in the sexual way, for Matt was too weak to do anything like that right now. But we lay together, and we were just lying there, looking at each other, when Matt carefully reached over and ran his fingertips along my arm. I felt shivers go through me at his gentle touch, and I moved closer, closing my eyes. He trailed his fingers up until they were touching my face, and then trailed over my cheekbones and jaw line, just barely brushing. I felt his thumb stroke my bottom lip and his other hand joined in on the touching of Mello. His hand tangled in my hair while the other one made its way down my neck, tracing every tendon, every bone. He swept his fingers lightly over my collarbone while he stroked the back of my head, touching the nape of my neck in a tender way. With one hand cupping my neck and the other on the back of my head, he pulled me into a deep, loving kiss that lasted only for a few blissful minutes until he had to pull away to breathe.<p>

"You're so beautiful." He whispered against my lips, giving me a small peck after.

"I love you, Mail." I felt him freeze, then melt into my body, pulling his arms around me and molding perfectly to me. I opened my eyes and found myself looking into his. He has such beautiful eyes. They're such a bright, clear, endless emerald green, and they're so easy to get lost in. I wrapped myself around him, curling us into a protected ball. I held him and listened to his uneven breathing, a symptom of his very low weight, no doubt, and I kissed his head, snuggling into his soft, fiery red locks.

"I love you too, Mihael." He murmured, burrowing his face into my chest. We slept like that, warming and being warmed by the other, breathing together, connecting like we used to. And for the first time in four years, I fell asleep and stayed sleeping.

_Look at the stars  
>Look how they shine for you<br>And everything you do  
>Yeah they were all yellow<em>

When I woke up, I heard the water running in the bathroom and Matt singing. I'm the only one on the entire planet to know this and I'm proud of the fact, but Matt has the most beautiful singing voice ever. He has a low, gravelly voice that somehow manages to be clear and perfectly pitched at the same time. Disregard anything you know about the song Yellow and imagine it being sung a bit lower, with a really sexy rough voice singing it. There's Matt.

_I came along  
>I wrote a song for you<br>And all the things you do  
>And it was called yellow<em>

Despite the fact that I was still half asleep, I wandered into the bathroom, drawn by Matt's voice, and found the bathroom door open.

_So then I took my turn  
>Oh what a thing to have done<br>And it was all yellow_

He was in the shower, curtain closed, and with the acoustics in the bathroom, his voice carried beautifully. I could imagine him standing there, water running down his body, with his head tilted back as he sang. The thought did interesting things to my body. It had been a while since I felt like that.

_Your skin  
>Oh yeah your skin and bones<br>Turn into something beautiful  
>You know you know I love you so<br>You know I love you so_

I sat myself on the counter and just listened to him, closing my eyes, enjoying the way the water falling mixed with his vocals.

_I swam across  
>I jumped across for you<br>Oh what a thing to do  
>Cause you were all yellow<em>

He laughed a bit during the last line, which made me smile, then shivers went down my spine as he sang the next line, his voice rippling perfectly.

_I drew a line  
>I drew a line for you<br>Oh what a thing to do  
>And it was all yellow<em>

I smiled as he continued. I had forgotten how much I loved this song.

_Your skin  
>Oh yeah your skin and bones<br>Turn into something beautiful  
>And you know<br>For you I'd bleed myself dry  
>For you I'd bleed myself dry<em>

He swore softly, like he was in pain, but continued nonetheless.

_It's true  
>Look how they shine for you<br>Look how they shine for you  
>Look how they shine for<br>Look how they shine for you  
>Look how they shine for you<br>Look how they shine_

As he repeated that line, I moved closer to him, for he was getting quieter. He shut off the water and sang the last lines softy, like he was whispering them.

_Look at the stars  
>Look how they shine for you<br>And all the things that you do_

He sighed absently, and I left the bathroom before he noticed me. I got back into bed and waited for him. He came out after a few minutes, with a towel around his hips and another one in his hands, rubbing his hair dry.

"Good morning." I said. He jumped about seven feet in the air and fell on the ground, wrapping the towel around himself. I giggled and leaned over the side of the bed. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. How long have you been awake?" I smiled and got off the bed, sitting beside him on the floor.

"Long enough to hear your lovely song." He turned bright red and I kissed his lightly freckled nose. "Don't be embarrassed, you know I love your voice." I held the edges of the towel covering his torso and tugged a bit. "Why are you hiding?" I asked in a slightly eager voice. Matt drew the towel tighter around himself.

"I'm not in very good viewing condition right now, Mels." That old nickname made my heart skip a beat. I kissed him quickly just for calling me that.

"It's okay. I know how skinny you are right now, silly." He was shaking his head before I finished my sentence.

"I've done more bad things Melly." He curled into a ball like he used to, looking at me with shame in his eyes. Softly, slowly, I peeled his fingers off the towel and took the towel away from him. I gasped.

I wasn't sure what to be more shocked at.

Running across his stomach, down his sides and his hips were tons and tons of little cuts and long cuts, all pretty deep and harsh looking. Some had turned to scars already, and some looked like they were made yesterday. There were cuts on his arms, on his wrists, even on his hands, making it look like he shoved both arms through a window, or dragged them along sharp glass. But the cuts that got to me the most were the ones just over where his heart should be, cuts that spelled out two letters, my initials, M.K

But then there was the fact that I could easily count his ribs, even when he breathed in. His hipbones stuck out and his arms were so thin I could have snapped them in half. He turned his head away, and I looked over him, kneeling, and I could see every vertebrae of his spine, sticking out like small hills on his back. Sure, Matt had always been a skinny little bastard, but never like this.

"Matty…" I breathed. He looked over at me with his sad, heart-stopping eyes, and I pulled him to his feet carefully. I ran my fingers through his slightly wet hair to his face and held his face gently. "It's cold-" I took moment to make my voice go back to normal. I forced a smile and kissed him lightly. "Would you like to get dressed?" he nodded nervously. I gestured with my head to my bags. "I have some clothes you can borrow." I walked ahead of him to my suitcase and pulled out some clothes I had stolen from him, much to his surprise. His lips parted in that cute shocked way.

"You have some of my clothes?" he asked, looking at me with his wide green eyes. I shuffled a bit, weirdly shy.

"Yeah…" I held a striped shirt close to me with one hand, fingering a pair of baggy jeans with the other. He surprised me by pulling me into a hug. I guess he was trying to squeeze me, but his arms felt light around my waist.

"Thanks Mels." After he got dressed, he sat on the bed and watched me run around and pack my stuff, eating a chocolate bar. I stopped for a minute to watch him sway a bit, leaning against the wall.

"Are you okay?" I asked, reaching for him. I held him in my arms and forced him to look at me.

"Sure," he whispered, his eyes rolling back. "I'm just a bit hungry."

"You're hungry? You should eat! Here, have this." I let go of him and gave him a chocolate bar, then picked him up and placed him on our bed, sprinting across the room to order something from room service. He laughed shyly and I heard the satisfying crack of teeth biting into chocolate. Once our food arrived, I carried it to our bed so we could eat together. He ate slowly, rubbing his stomach every now and then. "Are you okay? Do you want more?" he looked up and smiled, shaking his head.

"Where do you live?" I was confused, but answered his question anyways.

"New York. I have an apartment." He pushed the plates of food out of the way and curled up to me, resting his head on my lap. "Why?" I asked while stroking his hair.

"Take me home, Melly. I just want to go home." My heart contracted and I bit my lip, caressing his head, neck and shoulders.

"Okay." I said. That's all I needed to say.

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><p><strong>I think this is the longest chapter I have written so far. Hope you liked it!<strong>


	13. Challenger

**Heylo guys! I'm done being depressing, so now get ready for some good-natured fluffiness! And lemons.** **Yummy ;)**

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><p>So it was maybe six months after I moved in with Mello. I had gained some weight (Mello still complained that I weighed less than him and was taller. I know, it doesn't make sense. -_-) and gone to therapy to rid my mind of suicidal thoughts. I made a shit ton of money as a video game tester and a hacker (shh, it's a secret!) and Mello was getting ready to leave the mafia for a more, um, <em>stable<em> job. This meant he had to- ahem – silence some people.

Oh, we also had a large amount of sex, which makes anyone feel better (except for prudes… but if you're a prude then you probably won't be reading this). I was still a bit weak, so I was on the bottom for almost all of it. I tried to top once but got tired, and Mello had to finish things. I apologized over 9000 times, and he kept telling me it was fine, but I felt really bad. I still need to make it up to him.

I was thinking about that fact one day while sitting on the couch getting horny. Hey, Mels was at work and I was lonely. He was always up for a good fucking though, so all I had to do was wait until he got home and seduce him.

When Mello finally got home, there was a bit of blood on his face and in his hair. I jumped off the couch and had my arms around him faster than you could say "Peach's pussy".

"Holy fuck, Mels! Are you okay?" I asked, brushing his hair out of his eyes. He stretched up to kiss me and whispered,

"I'm fine. Just had to shoot some people today. I'm officially out of the mafia though, which is good. I'm going to take a shower, okay?" he gently pushed me away from him and walked to the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

Mello may be a big scary mafia man, and he's not afraid to pull the trigger. He isn't disturbed by the thought of killing people at all. But I know for a fact that Mello worries that it disturbs me.

Let me tell you something. That's ridiculous.

Ever since I got Mello back, he's been very careful with me. He tells me he loves me every day, kisses me good morning, plays with my hair, makes love to me gently, and even strays from too much contact in public. I understand the last part; Mello has a reputation to uphold, and being gay in his position can be dangerous.

When we're in public, Mello puts on his 'I will fucking kill you if you come close to me' look, and I wear my famous 'I'm a cute little puppy but if you touch my master I will bite off your fucking balls, bitch' look. We make a good couple.

I'm the touchy-feely emotional one in our relationship, so I'm all for holding hands in public, but Mello only does it every now and then. His favourite thing to do is grab my pinkie with his, and hold my hand close to his leg. Whenever he does that to me, it makes me smile like an idiot and I can't stop.

So, now that my worry was over, I was horny again, so I followed Melly to the bathroom and leaned against the sink. Blood on Mello was a regular thing, okay? I got over it easy. And I was _horny_! And Mello always gave me sex.

I could see his silhouette through the shower curtain, and I stared for a moment, imagining the water running down his gorgeous body, in the groves of his abdomen, his hips, lower… Hell yeah. Mello interrupted my ogling by being rude.

"Can I help you?" he asked, a hint of humor in his voice.

"Can I join you?" he laughed.

"Alright, fine. Just keep your hands off me, I'm not in the mood tonight." I raised my eyebrows and thought to myself,

_A challenger appears._


	14. Feeling Kinky?

**This chapter contains some hardcore/kinky yaoi and swearing, just to warn those of you who don't like it (teeheehee) And sorry it took so long to update!**

_**Don't like, don't read!**_

**Also, next chapter contains a character you all should know well and an O/C.**

**Whoever guesses the character gets their name featured in the next chapter and cake! :3**

**Annd, for those of you who want a funny story with lots of L action, check out my friend lawlietlivesforever. She has a hilarious story where she asks L awesome questions. (lol I'm not afraid to advertise my friend, aren't I loving?)**

**If you see any grammar/spelling mistakes, let me know. I apologise for that; I type fast and screw things up.**

**Enjoy!**

**P.S This is my longest chapter yet! Cheers! :D**

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><p>I took off my clothes and stepped into the shower behind him, slowly and softly bringing my hands around his hips.<p>

"Matt," he warned. "I already told you, I'm not in the mood." I pouted to myself and left a trail of soft kisses across his bare shoulders.

"But Melly… I just want to hold you." He sighed and placed his hands over mine.

"Fine." I could hear the scowl in his voice. I grinned, content with my small victory and resumed kissing his shoulders, sucking on him a bit. After a while of me tasting him, Mello kicked me out of the shower, grumbling something about distractions.

I skipped out of the bathroom, dried off and waited for him on our bed, half-hard and needing attention. He walked in a bit later with two towels; one drying his hair and the other around his waist. Mello hung the towel behind the door and turned to face me, facepalming.

"Matt…" I whimpered and turned on my puppy-eyes full force, begging him softly,

"Pleeease Melly! I'm so horny for you, baby." That got his attention. Mello loved it when I was submissive during sex. He pulled off his towel and walked slowly to the bed, letting me see that he was getting turned on too. He put his hands on my hips, looking down at me. I pouted up at him and he rolled his eyes, giving in and climbing on top of me. I responded with extreme enthusiasm, wrapping my legs and arms around him and capturing his mouth in a hot kiss. He moaned a bit and I smirked evilly, rolling over all of the sudden and tying him to the bed posts with the rope I had hiding under me.

"What the FUCK?" he cursed, thrashing wildly. I held him down and straddled his hips, letting him swear himself out. I leaned down and bit his earlobe, taking it into my mouth and sucking.

"Are you quite finished?" I asked in a condescending tone. He growled and bucked his hips in attempt to throw me off. "That's not gonna work Mels, my fat ass isn't going anywhere." I caught his disobedient mouth in another kiss and bit his lip roughly, earning a yelp from the man under me. "And your sexy ass is mine tonight." He glared at me, then grinned, saying,

"What, are you going to try and top again tonight? Don't fall asleep on me this time!"_Ooh, that hurt._ I winced at his insult. It was all part of the game, of course, for I could see the apology in Mello's eyes. I kissed him quickly to let him know he was forgiven, then got off of him completely and used another two ropes to tie Mello's legs down, eagle style. I stood beside the bed, looking over him, pretending that his full erection wasn't there.

"Well if you don't want it, then I guess I should leave you be, eh?" I shrugged and left the room, pulling on some boxers, keeping the door open so I could hear his threats following me. I took out my DS and sat by the door, waiting. After 20 minutes, I heard a whimper coming from our room. God, just that sound made me shiver in arousal. It wouldn't be too long…

"Mail," Mello called, his voice soft and desperate.

"Yes?" I answered back, turning off my DS. He moaned and whimpered again, bringing me to my feet. I leaned against the doorway, shaking my hair over my goggles. He looked at me, begging me with his eyes, his boner still straining. If there was anything Mello liked more than dominating me in bed, it was when I switched roles and tied him up like this. I smiled at him from the doorway. "Do you need something, Mels?"

"I need you." He whispered. I shuddered again and walked over to him, climbing between his legs. I made out with him, gently rubbing my hips against his to keep some friction going between us. I pulled away from him and kneeled between his legs, palming myself through my boxers. He gasped. It always got him off when I touched myself in front of him. I put a hand beside his head, still rubbing myself gently with the other, and moved so my mouth was right beside his ear, lips brushing his skin as I whispered,

"I have a plan with a few fun things to do, baby. Have you ever used a vibrator before?" he shook his head and tried to make puppy eyes at me. I chuckled. "Mello, I _invented_ that look, it won't work on me." I got off of him and reached for my hiding place under the bed, retrieving my toys.

I slipped a cock ring on Mello's fully erect dick, smiling as he protested. I took some lube and coated my fingers, slipping one in and searching for his prostate. I could tell I found it when he gasped, back arching. He moaned in appreciation, probably forgetting about the ring around his endowment. He would remember soon enough. I carefully prepared him, stretching him gently and licking around his erection whenever he made a noise of discomfort. When I deemed him ready, I lubed up my member and slowly sheathed myself. I hissed in pleasure and leaned down to kiss Mello again. The rest of my plan would be easier if I wasn't so horny. I gripped the bed sheets as I waited for Mels to adjust. He nodded eventually, murmuring,

"M-move." And I thrusted slowly, searching for his pleasure spot. God, he was tight. When I hit his prostate, he got even tighter, moaning softly. I cried out quietly, tucking my head against his shoulder.

"Ahhn, Mihael. Fuck, you feel so damn good." I knew he needed a little boost to his ego after I made him my uke. "Damn, I'm not going to last long. Oh, shit!" I swore loudly as Mello bucked his hips to take in more of me, pressing my tip to his prostate. He sighed and looked pointedly at me. I smiled and his rude look faltered as I rammed into him, gasping and moaning in pleasure. After a while, I was ready to come. Like I had said earlier, I wasn't going to last long. I was horny and Mello felt way too good for me to go at it for long. I aimed for his sweet spot, giving him pleasure too. I came with a soft cry and rode out my pleasure, waiting for Mello to realize he was being held back. He gasped as my cum hit his prostate, and groaned loudly.

"Mail, I'm gonna- Uhng, Mail, fuck! Wait, no, no, no! Please, take it off! Let me come, Mail!" he begged under me. I pulled out, collecting myself and putting my boxers on again. I grinned teasingly and sucked softly on his straining cock.

"Sorry Melly, but I had to relieve myself before I could continue." I smiled and kissed along the insides of his thighs, making him whimper again. Shit, I loved that noise. I growled playfully and went back to my toys, bringing out the vibrator I bought just for Mello. I turned it on to the lowest setting and ran it over his balls, making him toss his head back and writhe in pleasure. I took it away from his balls and pushed it into his entrance, searching for that spot. I hit his already sensitive prostate and turned it up a few levels, and Mello pulled at the restraints, moaning wantonly. "You like this, Mello?" he blushed and nodded, unable to speak. I reached down and fiddled with it, turning it up two more levels. "How about this?" I asked, and jerked off his painfully hard member.

"H-hell Mail, ungh, please take it off, I'm gonna come." _Hmm, dry orgasm. Sounds fun._

"No, I think I want to watch this." I turned it up another level and Mels lost it, scratching at the bedposts, tossing his head, thrashing as he orgasmed, not a single drop of cum leaving his body. I pulled out the vibrator, but I was far from done. I kissed the tip of his throbbing erection and asked; "Was it good, Mello?" he glared at me.

"F-fuck you Mail." I smiled.

"All in good time." I shoved the vibrator back in and turned it up all the way, past what Mello had experienced before. He screamed, his body shaking with pleasure, and I watched as his body slowly became rigid, his face contorted in that sexy, right-before-the-moment way. I pulled off the cock ring, watching as he almost shook the walls with the volume of his unabashed groaning. He came all over his stomach, then lay there, panting, his eyes begging me to untie him. I merely pressed the vibrator firmly against his sweet spot and watched. He grew hard again and came just as forcefully twice, then I cut off his fifth orgasm by putting the ring back on. He gasped and yanked desperately at his restraints.

"I'm gonna kill you, Mail. I swear to Go- Oh, OH! Oh my god! AHH!" I let him moan and thrash, having yet another dry orgasm. _Hell, that was pretty hot. I have to remember this. _He whimpered and begged me to stop as he got hard again, becoming more and more desperate as he got closer to the edge. Finally, I pulled out the vibrator just as he was about to come and he sighed in relief. I let him calm down a bit before I took off his cock ring, but he stayed hard. He gave me a pleading look and whispered, "One more time, Mail? Please?" I laughed and said,

"You horny bastard." I pulled off my boxers, re-lubing my member. He wouldn't need any prep, because of the vibrator, so I just slid myself in and started pounding him without waiting for him to adjust. I had to use my fingers as a makeshift cock ring for myself to last long enough for Mello to come first. When he did, he threw his head back, screaming my name in ecstasy. I let myself come after that, riding out our orgasms. I stayed above him, panting softly until I caught my breath, then I pulled out and put my boxers on again, admiring Mello's body. He was still in the afterglow of his orgasm, panting, the gleam of sweat covering his spent body. _Maybe just one more time._ I thought to myself. He jumped as I pressed the vibrator inside him again, looking panicked. I kissed him and whispered, "This is the last time, I promise. You're just so sexy…" he whimpered as I turned the vibrator up all the way, not wanting to torture him again. I twisted it around inside of him, hitting every part of his prostate. He whimpered and moaned raising his hips slightly. I pulled the vibrator out when he got hard again, and he gave me a confused look. I held his hips down and ran the vibrator over his sensitive manhood, earning myself a frantic yelp from Mello.

"Sh-shit, stop Mail." He begged half-heartedly.

"You don't really mean that, do you Mihael?" I ran it over and around him, hitting every inch of his member, watching him claw at the bedposts.

"Ugh, I'm gonna… Ah! I'm gonna… MAIL!" he shouted my name as he released again, making the vibrator slick as I kept it on him to prolong his pleasure. I took it away and turned it off, leaving him for a moment to get a towel and clean him off. I untied him and cuddled him to my scarred body, kissing his sweaty hair and his perfect angel's face.

"See? That was fun!" he growled and pulled me closer.

"Never… Ever… Do that… Again." He panted, biting my neck softly. I giggled and rubbed his back.

"Go to sleep, Angel. You must be tired."

"Fuck you." He murmured while burying his face into my chest.

"Maybe tomorrow." I ran my fingers through his hair while he started to fall asleep on my chest. He lifted his head and looked at me with exhausted eyes.

"Love you, Mail." He breathed, planting a clumsy kiss on my lips. I smiled.

"I love you too, Mihael."


	15. Let The Games Begin!

**Alrighty! No one guessed the character but that's okay 'cause I can't wait any longer to update! **

**Here's cake for everyone because I love you all for reading my story! **

**Get ready to meet my version (so far) of BB! :D :D :D**

**This chapter is in Mello's point of view. I wrote this chapter like three times to get it right. If you think it's awkward, tell me and I'll fix it.**

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><p>The next day, I got up before Matt and took a shower (And cursed him for my sore ass) and lay on the couch to watch TV. As Matt stumbled sleepily out of the bathroom, hair wet, I dragged him into the kitchen and forced him to make me breakfast. Even while he was half asleep, he made the best pancakes. Since we hated healthy things, we filled (or rather, <em>Matt<em> did) the pancakes with whatever we could find. Today, they had chocolate chips (duh), butterscotch chips, white chocolate chips, toffee bits, coconut and bacon bits. Don't even act disgusted, it's fucking delicious. **(A/N- I've tried it before, it's yummy!)**

Once we were full, we made our way to the living room and spent some silent time together, Matt playing his games and me reading a book. He sat in front of the couch and I spread out on it, stroking a hand through his hair while he swore about the "Noobs" on Halo 3. When he was done, he leaned his head back and I moved my book so he could rest his head on my stomach. It was a regular lazy day for us.

Then Matt wanted to go to the gaming store.

"Pleeease Melly? You never come with me! And the store got a new manager today, so I'm curious!"

"Why?" I asked incredulously. "You _hate_ people!"

"Yeah, but I liked the last manager and if they hire an ass, I'll have to find a new store to go to." I rolled my eyes at him. "Please, baby?" I sighed and pushed him off of me.

"Fine! But I'm not going to like it." I got off the couch, took three Advil (God damn it Matt) and brought him his morning dose of antidepressants with a glass of water. He smiled gently and took his pill, getting off his ass and bending back, moaning in pain while he stretched his back. _Shit, that was hot._ I smacked his ass and he grinned cheekily.

We took the elevator instead of the stairs cause I was waiting for my pain pills to kick in. He hugged me from behind and leaned against the wall, letting me lie against him. He kissed my neck softly and hummed in content. I pushed away from him as the elevator doors opened and two young-ish girls got on. One of the two smiled at me and took the other girl's hand, kissing her cheek. I nodded, smiled a bit (Smiling in public was rare, and smiling at someone other than Matt in public was almost never heard of) and resumed my position against Matt, letting him kiss my neck again and laugh quietly.

Matt agreed to drive after I whined about my still sore ass (That was a lie. The pills had kicked in. I was just feeling lazy) and he held my hand with his right one, tapping the fingers of his left hand against the steering wheel as he drove. I kissed his scarred hand and examined it, noting that his scars were fading. I smiled and held his hand against my face, letting him stroke my cheek and hair. I closed my eyes and stayed like that until he parked and tilted my face towards his, kissing me.

"You go inside, I'm gonna have a smoke." I rolled my eyes and kissed him back, agreeing silently. I got out of the car with him and reached across the car to ruffle his hair before entering the game store.

It smelled like plastic and paper, and posters of video game characters (some I recognized, thank you very much) covered the walls, while high definition TVs hung from the ceiling, showing game trailers and other game footage. The walls were lined with a shit load of video games. Matt would be drooling. I worked my way to the X-Box section and busied myself with counting the games Matt already owned. It was almost all of them.

"Hey there." A guy's voice interrupted my activity, and I looked over to find a man leaning over the counter, eating jam out of the jar with a spoon. I made a face at him and replied with a confused-sounding

"Hi?" he smiled, showing off pointed teeth. His eyes were red, I noticed, and he had black spiky hair.

"You don't look like a gamer. Whatcha doin' in here?" I crossed my arms and leaned against one leg.

"My… uh… Partner dragged me here. They're having a smoke right now." The guy crinkled his nose in the same way Matt did on the rare occasion someone beat him in a game. I found it absolutely adorable on Matt, but it seemed out of place on this man's face.

"Ew. You should get them out of that habit." I relaxed a bit.

"Trust me, I've tried." The guy smiled and held out his hand.

"I'm Beyond Birthday, the new assistant manager." I stepped closer and shook his hand. I think we was expecting me to be weirded out by his name, but I used to know someone named Near, so I wasn't fazed. Hey, Near… Beyond… Ahaha!

"Mello." He grinned and shoved more jam in his mouth, licking the spoon clean. What a weird dude.

"So you have a gamer girlfriend, eh? You're a lucky guy." I blushed a bit.

"Actually, no. My _boyfriend_ is addicted to games though, and he wanted to check out the new manager in case they were an ass." He smiled more.

"Hey, _my_ boyfriend is the manager, so I assure you, he's not an ass." I relaxed even more, relived that the guy… Beyond… wasn't a homophobe. There was a clinking sound as Matt entered the store, nearly trampling me as he ran over to the section beside me. "Geez, Jay, could you be any slower?" Beyond said to Matt, rolling his eyes. _Wait, what?_ Matt looked over at him and laughed.

"Wrong guy, dude. Oh, Mels, check out this one. It's the game I've been telling you about." He held up a game and smiled at me. I rolled my eyes and held back a grin.

"First, come here and meet the assistant manager. Isn't that why you came here?" Matt looked confused, then it snapped into his memory.

"Oh, yeah." He put the game back and came over to the counter, holding out his hand. "I'm Matt." He said happily. Beyond stared at him for a moment, then shook his head and took Matt's hand.

"Right. I'm Beyond. Sorry, you just look almost exactly like my boyfriend." Matt laughed and they started a conversation I was distracted from as another Matt walked through the door, his arms full of boxes.

"B, god damn it, help me with these fucking boxes." Beyond apologized to Matt and rushed over to Matt2, taking three of the boxes.

"Anyways," Beyond called over his shoulder. "Just look around, we haven't moved any games yet so you should be fine."

"Thanks." Matt grinned cutely and brought me over to a different section, crouching down to look through games. I pulled on his sleeve, getting his attention. "What's wrong?" he asked, standing up to look at me better.

"Matt, that guy looks just like you. It's crazy." He laughed and kissed me quickly.

"So I have a look alike. It's nothing to freak out about, Melly." I tapped my foot and tried to get it out of my mind. Matt got a new game for his X-box and bounced over to the counter, joyfully ringing the bell. He was always like this after his morning pill. The second Matt came over, apologizing and started ringing through Matt's purchase. I noticed that Matt had stopped bouncing and I kept an eye on the second Matt.

"Your total is $59.99." he said in a slightly deeper voice than Matt's and looked up, his smile slipping from his face. He was almost identical to Matt, but his hair was slightly brownish and his eyes were brown. He was a bit taller and had some stubble, whereas Matt was free of hair (I sometimes made fun of him for it) and he had some muscles going on, where Matt was a skinny guy.

"Jamie?" I heard Matt ask, his voice wavering. I noticed that he was shaking, and I rested my hand on the gun I kept in my pants, just in case.

"Mail?" Matt2 or I guess… Jamie replied. Matt dropped the game and backed away, grabbing my arm and turning to bolt out of the store, Jamie yelling after us, "Wait! Mail!" Matt ran to the car, jumping in. I quickly got in after him and he tried to start the car twice, but he was shaking too badly to do it. I started it for him and he screeched out of the parking lot, speeding down the street and nearly getting hit.

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!" I exclaimed, and flipped off the guy who nearly hit us. He laid on his horn. "What the fuck happened, Matty?" he was hyperventilating, shaking and trying to control tears all at once. I put a hand over his on the steering wheel. He kept his eyes forward, dodging cars and cutting people off as he got to our apartment building in a quarter of the time it took to get to the store. In the elevator, he took off his goggles, wiped tears off his face and took deep, shaky breaths in attempt to collect himself. I took his hand and he jumped, and then relaxed when he saw it was me. He rushed to our door and fumbled with the keys, swearing as he dropped them. I picked them up for him and unlocked the door, opening it for him.

Matt ran across the apartment and slammed our bedroom door without saying anything. I locked our front door and knocked timidly on the bedroom door. Matt hadn't got like this in a long time, and it scared me. I could hear him sobbing through the door. I bit my lip and called,

"Mail? Are you okay, baby?" Matt gasped a few times and replied,

"I never thought I'd see him again!" he sobbed for a while, and I opened the door, finding Matt curled up on the bed with a pillow over his head. I sat on the bed carefully and placed a hand on his side.

"Who is he?" I asked, pulling the pillow off. Matt hid his face and wailed into the mattress, breaking my heart. I lay down beside him and pulled him into my arms, letting him hide against my chest.

"He's my brother…" he finally got out, gripping my shirt like he used to when we were little. "I'm sorry I never told you, but I didn't think I would…" he looked up at me, his emerald eyes full of panic.

"If he's your brother, then why are you so scared of him?" I stroked his hair. His bottom lip quivered and I kissed his forehead. _God, he's so cute. Why does everyone have to hurt him?_

"Because, Mihael." He whispered. "He used to beat me too."

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><p><strong>I PROMISE IT'S NOT GOING TO BE DEPRESSING! You'll see in the next chapter. I PROMISE YOU!<strong>


	16. Talking It Over

**We have another Mello POV chapter here! What can I say? Even though I'm obsessed with Matty, I still love Mello too!**

**This one's kind of short, sorry, but I plan on making the next chapter long so do not depair!**

**Love you guys! Mwa!**

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><p>I let Matt take a nap in our room while I read books, tidied up and paced until it was time for Matt to take his second dose of happy pills (His words, not mine). I brought them to our room with a bottle of Mountain Dew (his favourite) <strong>(AN For those of you who don't know what Mountain Dew is, it's a lemony-lime carbonated drink that's super yummy :3) **At first, Matt turned his head and refused to take it, but I climbed on him and begged him, using my soft voice that I reserved for serious situations and post-sex cuddling. He took his pill and continued to sip his drink for a while, letting me stroke his hair. I kissed his cheek and went back into the living room to watch TV, waiting for it to be late enough for bed time. About two hours later, Matt joined me, sitting beside me and curling up to my side. I put an arm around his shoulders and he cuddled closer, stroking my legs softly.

"Feeling better?" I asked, playing with his hair. He looked up at me and smiled a bit.

"Yeah." He kissed my neck, where my scar was and said, "I'm sorry for worrying you." I shrugged.

"That's okay. I'd be the same way if I ever stumbled upon one of my siblings. Especially 'cause mine would be zombies." I laughed and Matt smiled. "Just do me a favor and never refuse your pills again."

"Okay." Matt cuddled closer, and I kissed his head, resting my cheek on top of his head. I rubbed his shoulder and he hummed, moving so I could reach better. Eventually, we changed positions so Matt was sitting between my legs, and I was massaging his shoulders. I wasn't as good as Matt when it came to massages, but I learned a few things from him.

"So," I murmured after a while. "Do you want to talk about it?" Matt sighed and started talking.

"Well, as you know, my mom was really sick when I was young, so I had to be careful around her, and my dad would take out a lot of his frustration about mom's condition on me, since it was my birth that made her so sick in the first place. Mm, move up a bit." He suggested, and I rubbed near his collarbones, making him sigh. "Oh, and Jamie is about six years older than me so that makes him… twenty-seven right now. Anyways, I guess to keep himself out of trouble with dad, he would- Ahh yes right there!" he was interrupted as I worked my fingers between his shoulder blades. "You're getting better at that, Mels." I thanked him and urged him on with his story. "Anyways, to keep out of trouble, he would… um… Help him I guess, in punishing me. Nngh, to the left. Yesss…" Matt hissed in pleasure and tilted his head back as I rubbed down his spine. I laughed and kissed the side of his exposed neck.

"So is that why you were so scared when you saw him again?" he sighed and shivered as my hands crept forward to massage his sides.

"It's like… Pretend I'm a full grown man who was raped when I was six. It's like being me, an adult, and seeing my abuser again. When you see them, it's like being that little kid again, and I felt helpless. And scared. Just like I did when I was little." He sighed again, this time out of sadness. I softened my motions with my hands, caressing him.

"Maybe he's changed." I whispered. He shrugged.

"I feel bad for running out on him like that, but I couldn't help it. Now that I think about it, I have my big scary mafia man to protect me if he wants to hurt me. So I think it might be good if we went back tomorrow, so I can say sorry?" he ended his sentence as a question, asking for my permission.

"If you feel up to it." He laughed a bit and leaned against me.

"Thanks, Mihael." I trailed my fingers up his back and gently rubbed the nape of his neck with my fingertips, causing his breath to catch. "Mmm, Melly…" I moved his hair away and breathed across the back of his neck, laughing gently as goose bumps covered his arms. I brought my hands around his chest and brushed my hands across his collarbones and lower to his nipples. He moaned softly and melted against me, letting me run my hands down his stomach and brush against his hips. I teasingly avoided his, er, nether regions and instead started rubbing and brushing his inner thighs with my fingertips. Matt was a shivering, moaning mess and I loved it. He whispered, "Mels, that's not fair. You can't target all my erogenous zones like that, it's rude." I laughed innocently and said,

"Who said I couldn't? My ass still hurts, so it's your turn tonight." I licked his earlobe and nudged him up, pulling him to the bedroom. "Come on! Sexy time!" he laughed and grabbed me from behind in the hallway, making me yelp and curse him out as he closed the door behind us and tossed me on the bed.

"Don't worry, baby. You can dominate me once I get naked." I yanked him onto the bed and rolled over so he was under me, stroking down his chest and then un-doing the zipper of his jeans.

"I don't think that'll be a problem."


	17. Author Note, Blaah!

Hey guys.

I'm having issues with my computer and it won't let me edit any of the docs I upload onto Doc Manager :S

So, enjoy the new chapter! I intend to update again this week, do not despair!


	18. Jamie

When I woke up the next morning, I was terrified.

I had woken up Mello by screaming my head off in the middle of the night, and he shook me to bring me back to my senses, looking rather freaked out himself.

"Jesus, baby! What were you dreaming about?" he asked while I sat with my head between my legs. He was rubbing my back softly to comfort me.

"It wasn't a dream." I whispered. "It was a memory." I peeked up at him and he nodded knowingly. "You were like this when we were little." I recalled. He stroked my hair and kissed me lightly.

"Come on, no one can hurt you. Time to go back to sleep." We settled back into bed in our usual position, my head resting on his chest with his arms around me and mine around his waist. "I'll protect you." He said gently.

Back when we were at Wammy's, when I first came there and Mello was still a fresh orphan too, he would wake in the middle of the night just like I just did; a gasping, sobbing mess. The first time it happened, he sprung right out of bed and looked around, calling for his mother. I sat up in bed and his face brightened, then he frowned when he saw it was me. I held out my hand, and he looked confused at first. I held my hand out until he took it, then I yanked gently until he crawled into bed with me. Then I turned him around and held him from behind, whispering,

"When I was with my Mommy and I got nightmares, she held me like this until I fell asleep." Mello snuggled a bit closer to me, making me smile. "Since our Mommies aren't here, though, I'll try to be the next best thing. It's just us now, for each other." I think it was the most I had ever said to him when we were alone, and I wasn't crying. I think there was only a few times after that where we didn't share a bed.

Anyways, when I woke up in the morning, I was terrified. I lay next to Mello until he woke up, stroking my fingers up and down his torso gently, looking at the scars on my hand and arm. We were still naked from our night of fun. ;) When Mello woke up, his eyes fluttered open and then sunk closed again. This happened twice before I had enough and planted a huge raspberry on his stomach. He squeaked like a girl and jumped, swearing his head off.

"What the _fuck _Matt!" I laughed my ass off and got out of bed to put on boxers. I leaned against our dresser and smiled at him, taking in his disgruntled form splayed out on the ground. "You're such a fucking weirdo." He grumbled, standing and stretching, sighing contentedly as he popped his spine. I drank in every detail of his naked body, and stepped forward to take him into my arms.

"You're so sexy, Mihael. If only I wasn't so tired from last night…" I purred into his ear, making him shiver against me. I let go of him suddenly and went into the kitchen to make breakfast.

Mello joined me after a while, clad in leather as usual. He walked over to the fridge and busied himself with chocolate milk. It always made me laugh when Mello drank chocolate milk when he was covered in leather, his scar showing proudly, his gun hanging sexily from his hip, holding a cup with a duck printed on it full of chocolate fucking milk. Don't ask about the cup, it's from the dollar store. Mello scowled at me when I laughed fondly at him, and I kissed his forehead while reaching over him to get chocolate chips from the cupboard. After we ate, I teased Mello by standing on my toes and resting my chin on his head. He hated that I was taller than him. Mello gave me my pills and I sat down from some gaming while Mello was fucking around on his computer. After three hours of my skills pwning Noobs, Mello tapped my head and asked if we were going to see Jamie today. I sighed. I had to get it over with, and I was starting to feel really bad about how I behaved.

So at around 2pm, we headed over to the game store. Mello brought his gun in case things got fishy, and I brought my bottle of pills, just in case. I smoked a cigarette and put my goggles on before we entered the store. Beyond was stocking shelves when we got there, and he smiled like we had brought him Jesus as a birthday present.

"Hey guys! We were hoping you'd come back! Jamie wanted to apologize for freaking you out yesterday." He addressed me, his face going a bit serious. I kicked my foot nervously, rubbing my wrist absently. Mello grabbed my hand and stroked my palm with his thumb comfortingly. I stopped my rubbing and looked up at Beyond, about to apologize, when Jamie came out of the back room.

Our eyes met. They were the same as they always were; a light brown, almost golden, nearly identical to my mother's eyes. We both had red hair, like our mother, but his was brownish because of my dad. My heart started beating faster out of reflex, and my breathing did the same. I rubbed my wrist against my thigh, enjoying the tingling and slight pain caused by tender scars.

"Mail." He breathed. The room was so silent you could have heard a pin drop.

"I'm Matt now." I said softly. His expression softened and he took a step forward. I only flinched a little bit. He frowned.

"M-Matt," he said, trying the name out. "It suits you." I swallowed and rubbed a bit harder against my thigh.

"Thanks." My voice sounded hoarse. Jamie sighed and took a few more steps toward me, reaching a hand forward to touch me. I tensed like crazy, having a small panic attack. Suddenly, a gun came between us, pointed at Jamie.

"I'm sorry, but that's close enough." Mello said, his voice final. Jamie's eyes widened, and he dropped his hand. Mello grabbed my hand with his unoccupied one, stopping my rubbing. "Stop it, Matt, you're going to open it." I whispered an apology. Jamie stared at the gun, and then looked at Mello.

"Sorry, I just-" He looked back at me, his eyes pleading. He used to look at my dad like that, when we were young. "Matt, I've changed. I've gotten older, gone to therapy and anger management. I'm different now. I don't want to hurt you. I _won't_ hurt you." He insisted, moving to step forward again and then pausing when he remembered Mello's gun. I looked into my older brother's eyes, thinking, using my genius brain.

"Mels." Mello looked over at me, keeping his gun steady.

"Mm-hmm?" I bit my lip and fiddled with the elastic of my goggles, still a bit frightened.

"It's okay." Mello looked at me, making sure, before he lowered his gun and tucked it back into his pants, hiding it under his coat. He stared Jamie down for a moment, then backed away slowly, standing behind me. Jamie moved closer to me uncertainly, letting me react. I just started rubbing my wrist against my thigh again. He slowly, hesitantly brought his arms around me and held me gently, barely touching me. I froze every single movement, even my rubbing, and squeezed my eyes shut. Jamie let go of me and moved in front of me, moving my chin up so I would look at him. He observed my face, making me feel naked, not in the good way. I felt exposed and abused. I started my rubbing again, even harder, flinching when I felt my skin break. Mello would hate me for that.

"You still have those goggles, huh?" he mused, not noticing my other actions, dropping his hand and wringing his fingers nervously. I nodded, then cleared my throat.

"They're all I have left of her." I whispered. Jamie looked down at his feet.

"I'm sorry I left." He said. I knew exactly what he was talking about. I brought my wrist up from my thigh and pressed my sleeve against it, cleaning the small amount of blood off of myself. I tapped my wrist a few times before speaking.

"I'm scared of you, Jamie." His head snapped up, his mouth open and I silenced him by holding up a scarred hand. "I'm very, very scared of you. But I never blamed you for leaving while you had the chance." He looked relieved.

"Thank you." He breathed. I tapped my wrist two more times and brought it down to my thigh again, bumping it against my leg. "What can I do to help? I don't want you to be scared of me anymore." He insisted. It seemed so weird for him to be saying that, after all the years of him saying '_Fear me.'_

I sighed.

"I need time, Jamie." Wow, that sounded like a break-up line. He nodded. I felt a bit better, seeing him looking so human. He had always seemed like a monster to me. He reached out, I flinched on reflex, and he slowed his movements to touch my goggles. He traced one of the lenses, then went around my head to touch the elastic. I felt the pressure of his fingers on the back of my head, and I flinched again. I heard Mello shift behind me. Jamie withdrew from me and smiled sadly.

"I didn't know mom gave those to you." I nodded. "I didn't really know much about her. You were always with her. Dad didn't like it." He bit his lip, and I did the same. He looked into my eyes again, smiling slightly. "Tell me about her. What was our mother like?" I barely thought over my answer, I just said the first words that came to my head every time I thought of her.

"Mommy was soft."


	19. Something

**Heeyyy! ^_^ **

**Get ready for a huge fucking Author Note :3 I won't be sad if you skip it.**

**I've received six reviews in around two days and to some that's not much, but it makes me happy! Fortunately for you guys, I'm not one of those authors that asks you to review, it's enough for me that you're just reading my story! :D **

**Anyways, the reviewers were Glimfire (They reviewed twice!) brightnight003, MyBeautifulBlackHeart (I love your name lolz), Mid-Summer Romance and XxHeartlessKissxX. **

**Thanks for the reviews guys! **

**To Glimfire's review for chapter 18, lol yes *drool*, I always imagined Mello to be protective of Matty :3 And they're both quite yummy! **

**The longest review I got EVER was from Mid-Summer Romance- Thank you SO MUCH for that, it made my day! And I have a few more long depressing chapters planned, no worries! About the uke/seme decision for these two, my version of Matt is kind of puppy-ish, sad and submissive, so I thought it worked to have him be uke most of the time, but he'll have his seme moments ;) (lol foreshadowing much?) And thank you for all the compliments to my writing! :D (shojo sparkles)**

**I have one more review I'm going to reply to and that's from XxHeartlessKissxX Thanks for hating Jamie, lol I don't really like him either. Even though I made him up. (That makes sense, I promise :3) Thanks for reviewing and thanks for the compliments!**

**I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!**

**I'll stop rambling now '-_-**

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><p><strong>The song used is Something by the Beatles. I DO NOT OWN IT!<strong>

**I DON'T OWN DEATH NOTE EITHER! If I did, it would be full of yaoi!**

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><p>Matt and Jamie sat in front of the store, talking, while I hung out with Beyond inside the store, closing up and watching Jamie like a hawk watching its prey. I think B noticed.<p>

"Hey, Mello. Jamie told me everything about what happened, and he really has gotten better. He's never shown any sign of violence towards me, and he even worked at a daycare at one point. He won't hurt Matt."

"I'm not even sure if it's Jamie I should be worried about… Matt has his problems too." B nodded, and disappeared into the back room before bringing a jar of jam and, to my excitement, a bar of chocolate.

"For you," he said, handing me the chocolate. "And for me." He opened the jar and smelled it, sighing in ecstasy. I laughed. B pulled a huge spoon out of nowhere and ate a huge spoonful of jam, almost groaning in delight. I raised my eyebrows, wondering if I looked like this when eating chocolate. I ripped the wrapper open and died a little bit. Yeah, probably.

"How did you know I like chocolate?" I asked, toning down my addiction. B rolled his eyes.

"You reek of the stuff." We chatted about stupid stuff until Jamie came back into the store, looking relaxed and happy. I glanced out the window and saw Matt lighting up outside.

"I really need to get him to stop doing that." I muttered.

"I tried to tell him not to, but he didn't listen. Also, he hurt himself again while we were out there." Jamie told me, sounding slightly nervous. I turned the full force of my icy gaze on him, making sure he cowered. And he most certainly did.

"Hurt himself how?" I asked, my voice dark and menacing. Oh, yeah! I still got it!

"Well, you know, he does that rubbing thing…" I narrowed my eyes at Jamie and started reaching for my gun, when Matt came in, humming, smelling of smoke and outside. I went over to him and took his arm, pulling back his sleeve. Matt sighed,

"Damn…" and tried to step away. I held his arm firmly and looked up at him, raising my eye brows. He had re-opened one of the deeper scars, and was bleeding a bit.

"Matty…" I warned.

"I didn't even notice I was doing it." He insisted, crossing his arms and tapping his hip nervously. I held his face and got up on my tip-toes to look him straight in his goggled eyes.

"You better start noticing. We're going home so I can clean that." I felt Matt wrap his arms around my waist and pull me close, starting a neat little box-step around the store.

"_Something in the way he moves." _He started singing gently.

"Don't even start!" I tried to push Matt away, but he just tightened his arms around me and brought me closer, his breath tickling my ear while he chuckled and continued,

"_Attracts me like no other lover." _I rolled my eyes and gave up on getting away, letting him nuzzle into my neck and kiss me there gently. "_Something in the way he woos me…"  
><em>

"Matt, stop singing! We have to fix you up!" he ignored me and twirled me around suddenly, still keeping me in his arms. He lifted me up a bit so I was standing on his feet, placed on of his hands on my waist and held my hand with the other, and started dancing me around the store, making Beyond laugh and Jamie blush. Matty was a good dancer.

_"__I don't wanna leave him now, you know he believes in hell." _I rolled my eyes at his change of lyrics.

"Matt, let go of me. We're leaving now!" he pouted and pulled me into a deep kiss before letting go of me.

"Fine. But I'm finishing my song when we get home." he started walking towards the doors, waving behind him at B and Jamie. I waved fondly at Beyond and thanked him for the chocolate, glared fiercely at Jamie, and left the store. I caught up with Matt to find him bending into his car, looking for something, showing off his cute ass. I smacked his ass, laughing when he yelped and jumped, hitting his head.

"That's what you get for showing off your ass to the rest of the world. That-" I gestured to his backside. "Is mine." I then stuck my tongue out and jumped into the driver's seat.

"No." Matt said in a final tone.

"No?" I wasn't sure what he was referring to.

"I drive." I laughed and got out of the car, pulling him down for a quick kiss.

"Fine. But it'll be my turn eventually." Matt shuddered and cried,

"My poor baby!" I gently cuffed him upside the head and slunk around to the passenger seat. When I got in and sat down, Matt leaned over and sung softly into my ear, _"Somewhere in his smile, he knows. That I don't need no other lover." _I grinned and kissed his cheek as he started the car. He trailed his eyes along my body while he sang, "_Something in his style that shows me." _He winked at me and continued. "_I don't wanna leave him now, you know he believes in hell._" He took a break from singing and focused on driving, holding my hand while he did so. When we got into our apartment, I flopped onto the couch and Matt took off my boots for me, reminding me of why we left in the first place. I went into the kitchen, with Matt trailing me like a puppy. I hopped onto the counter and took his arm again, cleaning his new cut. He winced a few times.

"You did this to yourself." I reminded him. He tucked his head against my shoulders and sang,

"_You're asking me will my love grow?_" I laughed.

"I didn't ask you that." he bit my shoulder, making me gasp and pulled me closer with one hand.

"_I don't know, I don't know!_" God, his voice gave me shivers. "_You stick around, now it may show. I don't know, I don't know!_" I let go of his arm and let him snake his hands around my hips, trailing soft kisses up my neck to my jaw. I shivered and leaned my head back, letting his hands undo the zipper of my vest.

"Mm, Matt." I breathed as he left feather-light kisses down my chest and softly licked one of my nipples. He tok off my vest and made his way back up my neck continuing his song, his voice breathy.

"_Something in the way he knows._" he lightly nipped at my skin and licked me. "_And all I have to do is think of him._" he pulled away, took off his shirt and kept going. "_Something in the things he shows me." _he grinned evilly and ran his hands up my thighs when he stepped closer to me. "_I don't wanna leave him now. You know he believes in hell."_ I pulled off his goggles and pulled him so close tht our hips pressed caught my mouth in a gentle, lust-filled kiss, wrapping his arms around me and letting me tangle my fingers in his hair. My hands ran down his neck and shoulders, making him moan softly and raising goose-bumps on my skin. My fingertips found my initials carved into his chest, and I kissed them, brushing my lips against his skin, while he panted against my hair.

I bit his collarbone gently, loving how I could feel his member hardening against my thigh. Matt's weak spots included his neck, stomach, hips and thighs. Mine were my waist, the border where my scar met my regular skin, my mouth (A good kiss could get me hard right away) and the area underneath my jawline. Matt scraped his nails along my waist, sending little shocks of pleasure-pain through my body. Shut up, I'm a bit of a masochist. I could feel myself starting to get horny as he breathed heavily against my neck, moaning again as my fingers found his zipper and brushed accidentally against his half-hard dick. We both jumped six feet in the air when someone pounded at our door. "Fuuck!" Matt complained, putting his goggles back on and moving away from me.

"God damn it! This better be good!" I shouted, now lonely in the kitchen. Matt laughed and said,

"If they're Jehova's Witnesses, they're all yours, baby!"

"Jehova's Witnesses don't come to apartments!"

"Whatever!" I heard the door creak open and Matt say, "City morgue, you stab 'em, we slab 'em!" and I had to physically stop myself from laughing out loud. "Oh, hey guys... Not anymore... Well we were gonna have sex, but if you want to come in, you can." I nearly fell off the counter.

"What the fuck? Matt, who is it?" Matt laughed and poked his head into the kitchen.

"B and Jamie." I threw my head back and groaned in frustration.

"But Maattyyy!" he chuckled and hugged me, kissing my neck softly.

"Be polite." he murmured, turning his head to suck at my neck. I ran my hands down his sides and dipped my head down to make out with him briefly. B and Jamie walked in just when Matt bit my tongue and yanked me closer with his fingers gripping my hips. Jamie looked at us, wide-eyed. Beyond whistled and put down his jar of jam to start clapping, making Matt laugh and duck his head against my shoulder. I glared at B, pulling my arms around Matt possessively.

"So what brings you two to our shithole of an apartment?" I asked while stroking Matt's hair and narrowing my eyes at Jamie. I noticed Jamie staring at Matt as he turned around, facing the other men. Jamie's brown eyes were tracing every single scar on Matt's body. Matt shrunk into me and I put my arms around his chest, kissing his head to comfort him. B put his arm around Jamie's waist and announced,

"We were having hot, loud sex and our neighbours complained! So we have to find a new place to stay!" Jamie turned bright red and smacked Beyond's head.

"What the fuck! We agreed not to tell them that part!" B pouted and reached over to get his jam.

"But we walked in on their fun, I don't think they'd care if we talk about our sex life." Jamie smiled sadistically.

"So you don't mind if I tell them that you're bottom?" B pushed Jamie.

"That's just rude!" he yelled. "Anyways, can we borrow your couch for quiet-ish sex and sleeping?" I thought about this.

"The floor is for sex. Couch for sleeping. Feel free to use the bathroom for sex, too, if you'd like. Just clean up afterwards." B shouted with joy and rushed Jamie out of the kitchen.

"We'll be back with some crap! You guys have an hour to get it on before we get back!" The door slammed shut and Matt turned to face me starting to kiss down my chest.

"To the bedroom?" he asked.

"To the bedroom." I agreed, laughing. Matt picked me up, I wrapped my legs around him and he kissed me while he walked into our room.

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><p><strong>I feel like making the next chapter all about smex! :3 Have fun, my little non-prudes!<strong>


	20. Roomies!

**RAWR!**

**I had to wait **_**forever**_** to start writing again 'cause my computer fucking broke! T.T**

**But everything's better now, soooooooo**

**ENJOY YAOI! :3**

**Oh and P.S- **

_**THIS IS NOT THE END OF THE STORY!**_

I tossed Mello lightly onto the bed, crawling on top of him. I held his face and kissed him slowly, flicking my tongue into his mouth. I curled my tongue around his and pulled it into my mouth, sucking all of the chocolate flavor off of his tongue. I kissed him open-mouthed and very, very slowly. He liked it like that. In fact, I could feel him getting harder as I kissed him. I ground my hips against his and laughed gently when he moaned. I bit his bottom lip softly, then pulled back, capturing his lips with mine in a chaste kiss.

"How many times do you think we can do it in an hour?" he panted while I ran the tip of my tongue down the border of his scar.

"I dunno." I replied, kissing up his chest to nibble lightly on his neck. I came right up to his ear and murmured, "Let's find out." I sucked on his earlobe for a moment, and worked my way down his torso with my mouth. I dipped my tongue into his navel, then sat up, straddling his legs so I could work at taking his pants off. It took me a while, but I did it eventually, and I threw them to the side, ignoring Mello's protests. He stopped talking and gasped loudly when I took him into my mouth, sucking him until he was fully hard. I pulled away with an extra hard suck on the head of his dick, looking up at him. His head was tossed back, golden hair thrown across the pillow. He was panting lightly, his chest rising and falling. I licked up his chest and bit his neck harshly. He yelped and grabbed my hair, making me shudder. Sometimes, I liked it rough. I caught his wrists and held his hands above his head, dominating his mouth with a long kiss that made his member throb against my stomach.

"M-Matt!" he cried as I sunk my teeth into his neck again, leaving a bite mark. I sucked, _hard_ on his skin, leaving a nice, noticeable hickey there. I left a trail with my tongue up his neck and pressed under his jaw with my tongue. Mello squirmed underneath me, trying to free his hands. I laughed again, causing a shiver and a small moan to leave Mello.

"I'm feeling kinda rough tonight." I told him. "Feel like being my bitch?" I pulled myself up so I could look into his eyes. Mello made a nice uke, when he wasn't in the dominatrix mood. Mello made a pouty, submissive face and tilted his head back, giving me access to his neck.

"Please," he begged. That's all he needed to say. I rolled over and let go of Mello's hands. He looked confused for a moment.

"My pants are still on." I explained. "Fix that." Mello giggled quietly and sunk down between my legs to pull off my loose pants. He yanked off my boxers and explored my hips and thighs with warm, soft touches that brought heat to my lower-areas. I moaned in appreciation and snaked a hand down to stroke my length, knowing very well that it made Mello hot. He groaned a bit and crawled back up on top of me, straddling me eagerly. He pulled at my arm, taking my hand away from myself and rubbed his member against mine. We both let out pleasured sighs and I pushed Mello over, reaching for lube. I spread it all over three fingers and pressed one inside of him, brushing his prostate gently. Mello sighed and moaned,

"More!" so I slid in a second finger and scissored him, leaning down to lick the underside of his dick. "Ahn! Just get it over with and get inside me already!" I laughed and flicked his member with my tongue, bringing a third finger into the situation. I gently scraped a nail over his prostate, and enjoyed the sharp cry of pleasure from Mello. I stretched him for a moment, then took my hand away and slicked up my manhood. As soon as I went inside of him, I heard the front door open and B start singing.

"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me!" I started to pull out, but Mello grabbed my hips and pulled me deeper, making my breath catch.

"Don't even think about blue-balling me! You better finish what you started!" he growled, using his dominatrix voice. I felt my cock twitch inside of him and I started thrusting deep into him, wanting to finish this quickly. I leaned over him and held him close as I made love to him, forcing his open and panting mouth into a kiss. I aimed as best as I could to hit his prostate every time. I pulled away from his lips when I felt him getting tighter and I paused, lightly nipping down his scarred neck. Mello made a desperate whimpering noise. "Why did you stop? I'm close, Mail." I smiled, my sadistic side taking over, and I dug my nails into his thighs, making him yelp and then slap a hand over his mouth. I took his hands and forced them over his head again.

"Can't have you coming too quickly, now can we?" I growled, starting up rough thrusts, hitting his sweet spot dead-on. He let out a string of whispered swear words and gentle moans as the bed started creaking and I pressed deeper inside of him, closing my eyes as a heated coil started in my stomach. "Say my name." I ordered.

"Mail…" he groaned as I rolled my hips, rubbing the tip of my penis around his prostate. I bit into his neck and snapped my hips forward, thrusting even harder into him. Mello threw back his head and cried out in ecstasy. The coil was getting tighter and tighter and I was so close…

"I can't hear you!" I sped up my thrusting, getting closer.

"Oh my god! MAIL!" he started chanting my name and screaming in pleasure, getting impossibly tighter with every thrust. I let myself go, losing rhythm a bit and moaning against his neck while I came inside of him, releasing one of his hands to jerk him off. He arched his back and groaned so loud it almost hurt my ears as he had one of the sexiest orgasms I've ever witnessed. We rode out our pleasure, and I lay down on him when we calmed down, completely spent. "Holy shit… That was so good, Mail." He panted, stroking my hair softly. I moaned as I pulled out and Mello made a noise of protest, but let me pull him into my arms when I lay down beside him. While my body calmed down, I stroked my fingers down Mello's sides and kissed the back of his sweaty golden head. There was a gentle knock on the door and Beyond poked his head in.

"You guys are early!" I complained, pulling a blanket over our bodies. Jamie looked in, his face red. B looked completely unfazed.

"Mello, you're so fucking loud! Matt you're a sexy moaner." Jamie slapped B's shoulder, getting redder by the minute. I tried not to blush and failed. Mello, who had no shame, leaned into me and slipped a hand under the blanket to stroke my thigh.

"Thanks. So, the linen closet is two doors over. We don't have much food cause we haven't gone shopping yet. Don't fucking touch my chocolate, Matt's Mountain Dew, my computer or Matt's games. I think that's all. Go get comfy!" Beyond closed the door and the two of them shuffled off. Mello let me snuggle with him for a little bit before he got out of bed and pulled on a pair of pants, dragging me up with him. I was less comfortable than him, so I put on jeans and a shirt and retreated to the living room where I sat on the couch and started playing. When Mello came in, I started to get onto the floor, but he stopped me and got on his knees in front of me.

"Mels," I moved around, unable to see the screen. "If you're gonna sit near me, I'll just go on the flo- oh wow." I hadn't noticed that he was leaning down and undoing my pants until Mello lifted my hips and pulled the front of my pants down. "Mel!" I exclaimed as he set to work, licking me softly, making me get so hard so fast it _hurt! _I paused my game and leaned my head back, sighing. I felt Mello take me into his mouth and suck a few times, and then he looked up at me cutely. "Melly, what if they come in?" he winked at me.

"Let them watch." He whispered, and he settled between my legs again, spreading them wider, taking all of me into his mouth and sucking roughly. _Ahh deepthroating. _I moaned quietly. I wasn't going to last long. Mello only ever went down on me during sex to get me going; he _very rarely_ goes down on me just for a blowjob. He has a tongue that's just as skilled as my hands. I can finger him to an orgasm, and he can tongue me to an orgasm. Like right now.

"F-fuck, Mels! God, you're so good at this." I put a hand in his hair and stroked his golden strands, pulling softly while I moaned again. "_Ungh! _I'm gonna… Ohhh yesss!" I released into his mouth, and Mello sucked gently until I was done. I leaned my head back, totally buzzed, and Mello laughed while he pulled my pants on properly. I slid onto the floor and pulled him into my lap while Jamie and B came into the room, arguing about something.

"But there's no jam! We'd only be a minute! Hey Mello, wanna go grocery shopping with me?" Beyond asked when he came into the room, smiling creepily and tilting his head to the side. Mello didn't notice the smile, and tucked his head between my neck and shoulder, sighing.

"But I'm comfy. Can we go tomorrow?" B sighed and clicked his tongue.

"_Fine!_ But only cause you two look so cute together!" Jamie facepalmed and dropped a bunch of sheets on the couch.

"You're so gay, B." Beyond crept up behind Jamie and grabbed his hips, sinking his teeth into Jamie's shoulder. "OW! What the fuck?"

"Think about how gay _you_ are when my _dick_ is up your _ASS_, shithead!" Jamie pushed him away and they got into a playful scuffle that ended with Jamie leaned against the couch, making out with B.

"I think we should give them some privacy." I murmured to Mello, who was falling asleep on my shoulder. I half carried him to our room and crawled under the blankets, pulling his pants off.

"Whoa! What's going on down there?" he asked sarcastically, spreading his legs. I kissed the insides of his thighs, licking softly, and slowly worked my way to Mello's growing erection.

"I just realized that we've been more sexually active than we usually are." Mello laughed, and then moaned as I took him into his mouth.

"I think we should get like this more often." He suggested.

"Mmm." I hummed in agreement, making Mello react nicely. He panted as I traded his member for my finger and slipped it inside of him. I rubbed his prostate, making him moan again and get harder. I teased him with my tongue and took him into my mouth again, sucking heavily. I used my talented fingers and my less-talented mouth to bring him to a quick orgasm that gave Mello shivers and caused him to pull on my hair.

When I came back up from the blankets and kissed Mello, I noticed loud yelps and moans of pleasure coming from the living room area. Mello rolled his eyes and cuddled into my chest, letting me hold him. I reached over him to get my I-pod, audio splitters and two sets of earphones to block out the sound. After about five songs, I tested to see if it was safe and found that our ears wouldn't be damaged.

I sang softly to Mello until he fell asleep, then rested my head against his and closed my eyes in peace. The last thought that ran through my head before I fell asleep was,

_Life is good._


	21. I Surrender

**YO BRO!**

**Are you ready for THE LONGEST CHAPTER I HAVE EVER WRITTEN?**

**I'm really sorry in advance to those of you who like happy chapters, but I promised Mid-Summer Romance that I would write more depressing chapters!**

**Thanks to all the reviewers! I love getting feedback from you guys! AHH BIG HUGS! (Happy screaming)**

**To reviewer brightnight003- All I have to say is Y U READ MY MIND? **ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)

_**WARNING**_

_**THERE'S A LOT OF VIOLENCE AND SADNESS AND DISTURBING MATERIAL IN THIS CHAPTER!**_

_**READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!**_

**So yeah!**

**Love ya ^-^**

I woke up before Mello and decided to make breakfast in bed for him. Just cause I'm that loving :3 I ventured out into the kitchen in just my boxers, being too lazy to get dressed. I started making Mello's favorite breakfast when I was scared shitless by a shadow standing in the doorway. After I had a heart attack, I realized it was a shirtless B with a blanket around his hips. He leaned against the doorway and raised his eyebrows at me.

"Hey, you know, you're pretty sexy. You're like a skinny version of Jay." He wiggled his tongue at me, skulking closer, and said, "If you ever want to play, I'm open for business." He rested a hand on my bare stomach and I went bright red, backing away. A shot went off and we both looked toward the door, wide-eyed. We found, of course, Mello standing in the doorway, his gun pointed at the ceiling. There was a hole where he had shot a warning. His eye brows were raised, and he was only wearing his leather pants. Mello casually put his gun in his back pocket and peeled B off of me, pulling his arms around my hips. He leaned his head against my shoulders, looking at B.

"Mine." He said simply. Beyond started at him, open mouthed. Mels redirected his attention to me and asked sweetly, "What's for breakfast?" I laughed, used to Mello's itchy trigger-finger. I had been shot at a few times too. Not with harm as the intention, just to get me to shut up.

"Pancakes?" I offered. "With all the good stuff. We only have unhealthy food right now." Mello nipped at my shoulder softly and let go, moving to sit on the counter.

"Excellent. Hey, what's your last name?" he sent this question over to Beyond, who was still recovering.

"Uhh… Birthday. Why?" Mello snorted.

"Beyond Birthday? Interesting. Can we just call you BB?" Beyond made a noise of approval. "Hey that sounds familiar…" Before we could go any further with our conversation, Jamie shoved himself into the kitchen, pulling jeans on.

"Did I hear a fucking gunshot?" he asked, looking more than slightly rumpled.

"Your boyfriend was molesting me." I informed him, looking for the pancake mix. BB whined,

"I was just kidding! And then Blondie shot at me!" I heard Mello's gun clicking and he insisted,

"I'll do it again! Don't fucking test me! That man over there is my fucking _property_!" I spun around.

"Mel!" I complained.

"What? You are!" I walked over to him and ran my hands up his thighs, leaning down to bite his earlobe.

"You're mine too. Don't forget that." I whispered, making him shudder and drop his hands around my waist. I crept one hand up his naked waist, and grabbed his gun with the other hand while he was distracted. "No guns before breakfast. That was a rule." I kissed him quickly and returned to making pancakes, putting the gun out of Mello's reach. Mello clung to me for the rest of breakfast, wailing like a child that 'His baby missed him'. Jamie kept shaking his head. B was eating out of a random jar of jam.

"How did you end up with this guy, little bro?"Jamie asked, laughing quietly. I shifted closer to Mello, uncomfortable with endearing names unless they were from him.

"He was my friend at the orphanage I went to." I explained, being vague. "As we got older, I started falling more and more in love with him and eventually I told him how I felt. Apparently, he felt the same. Either that, or he's using me for my body." At the last sentence, I flipped my hair and clicked my tongue, pushing out my chest. Mello lightly punched my arm in annoyance.

"Pfft, whatever, you skinny bitch." I pouted at him, sending puppy eyes at him. He rolled his eyes at me and leaned forward to kiss my cheek. "Don't worry, you're still sexy." I grinned and pulled him into a side-hug, burrowing my head against his shoulder. "So, are you guys up to shopping today? We need food."

"Actually!" BB cut in, throwing his hands in the air, getting jam on Jamie in the process. Jamie sighed and reached for a paper towel, wiping off his bare chest. I realized that we were all shirtless, and BB was pretty much naked. This made me blush and hide against Mello more. "I was thinking just you and me could go, Mello." I looked up at Mello, gauging his reaction. He bounced his knee under the table, something he did when he was thinking. I rested my hand on his thigh.

"You should." I said. "You can get to know each other. I know you like BB, Mels." Mello pursed his lips, narrowing his eyes. He ushered me off of his lap suddenly, holding up a finger to the other two men to let them know he needed a moment, and dragged me to our room. "Mel?" he ran his hands through his hair and looked at me with hesitant eyes.

"Are you sure you can do this? Can you be alone with him yet?" he asked, his icy eyes melting with concern. I considered his question for a moment.

To be honest, no, I didn't think I could do it. I was terrified of Jamie still, every time I looked at him. He was still that boy, _my brother_ who would beat me bloody and laugh in my face. He was that boy who would break me until there was nothing left to break and then hand me over to my father. He would stand by while my father touched things he shouldn't have touched, while he violated and humiliated me. He stood there with a sick, heartless, satisfied smirk, like he had done something good. And then, when I was sent to bed, bleeding and crying, he was the boy who followed me into my bedroom and asked how it felt, if it felt good to be punished like I deserved. He was the boy who sat by my bed with the sole purpose of keeping me awake, whispering threats and hurtful names in the darkness, a shadow within the shadows.

I hadn't told Mello the details of my abuse. I didn't think he could stomach it.

I kind of regret doing that.

Mello watched my expression carefully, his face contorting with worry the longer he looked at me.

"Baby, I'll bring you with us if you're scared. I'll protect you." He said softly. I moved closer and hugged him. I loved it when he called me baby. He held me, letting me press against him. I wound my arms around his waist and backed up so I was sitting on the bed with Mello standing between my legs. I rested my hands on his hips and he placed his hands on my arms, looking down at me. We stared at each other for a long, silent moment until I spoke.

"I have to try, Melly." I said in a small voice. Mello closed his eyes and I leaned forward, resting my head on his stomach. I felt Mello start to stroke my hair. "I know he's changed. Maybe all I need is some time to get used to the new him. Maybe I just need to get to know him again." Mello sighed and moved his hands to lift my head so I was looking at him.

"You promise to call me if something goes wrong? If he makes you even a little bit scared, you call me. Promise me, Mail." I smiled gently at him and stood up so I could look into his eyes.

"I promise." I whispered, placing a soft kiss on his lips. "I love you, Mihael."

"I love you too." Mello let me put on a shirt and pants before we walked into the kitchen again. He brought a tight black t-shirt with him and let me trail him to the living room.

Jamie was fully dressed, spread out on the couch with BB on his lap, who had also put on clothes.

"You know," I said, leaning against a wall and looking at Jamie and BB. "You look really familiar. Do you have a brother?" I addressed BB when I said this. He looked surprised.

"I have a twin." He said. "But he died a while back. He was a detective." I looked over at Mello at the same time he looked at me.

"Was your brother L?" Mello asked, his eyes flicking over to BB. B looked shocked.

"How did you know that?" he asked, standing up. Jamie looked confused.

"We came from Wammy's." Mello said, leaning back on one leg and crossing his arms. BB's mouth fell open.

"No way! Me too!" Mello and I were both surprised. Then it clicked.

"Oh my god! You're _Beyond Birthday_! The crazy twin at Wammy's!" I shouted. B smiled widely.

"That's me!" he said proudly. Mello looked ecstatic.

"I have so much to ask you!" He fluttered his hands in excitement, one of his gayer qualities. BB bounded across the room to the door and bounced in excitement.

"Well come on! Ask me while we're shopping!" Mello smiled (This was very rare) and went to get his keys. He grabbed me before he left and pulled me in for a kiss.

"If he does _anything_, call me! I love you." I kissed him again, just a small peck.

"I love you too." I watched as Mello and BB left the apartment, already chatting happily. I turned to offer Jamie a smile, attempting to hide my nervousness. Jamie grinned back at me from where he was sitting.

"So what do you want to do?" he asked, standing and stretching. I felt my heart jump with anxiety.

"I was gonna play some games." Jamie nodded in agreement.

I slipped past him and sat in my usual spot, starting up one of my favorite games. Jamie seemed different from how he was when BB was around. It was making me nervous. _Calm down, calm down. Just focus on Tekken. It always calms you down. _I fumbled with a pack of cigarettes and lit one, trying to steady my shaking hand. I panicked a bit when I heard Jamie locking the front door. _Breathe, just breathe. _ I told myself, inhaling a lung full of nicotine. I blew the smoke out slowly, leaning my head back to watch the cloud disappear. I played and smoked, trying to calm down, but every time Jamie got close to me, every hair on my body raised in alarm. He sat next to me and I tensed like he had held a gun to my head. The thought of guns brought something to my head. I could sense it was important, but I couldn't for the life of me remember…

"Playing games sounds fun, Mail." My blood turned to ice as he pronounced my real name with his lips right beside my ear. "But I had other games in mind." I jolted out of my position, standing beside the couch, my heart pounding.

"W-what are you talking about?" I stuttered, my voice barely audible. Jamie smiled _that_ smile, his lips curling over his teeth, his eyes burning sadistically, flicking over to look at me from the corner of his eye. He stood, and I ran. I bolted to the door, letting out a yell of panic as his strong arms locked around my waist, trapping my arms.

"You're not getting away this time." He hissed, his tongue flicking out to touch my ear. I gagged in response. He yanked me away from the door, my struggling not fazing him.

"HELP!" I screamed "HELP! HE-" Jamie covered my mouth with his hand, turning my screams to muffled whimpers. He dragged me to the hallway and threw me on the ground. He smiled again, showing me my still-lit cigarette in his hand. The first mark he left on me was the cigarette burn on my collarbone.

Luckily for me, (or so I thought) I was bigger and stronger than I used to be. I tried to stand, but he stopped me with harsh kick to the ribs. I bent over, gasping, and he kicked me again in the shins, and back and arms and head… over and over and over again. I started sobbing, trying desperately to get away. He pulled me up by my hair, pulling a pained yelp from my lips. He pushed me against the wall and leaned down to bite at my neck. I cried out as sharp teeth met my pale skin. He laughed roughly, pressing me against the wall with one arm and running a hand down my body to grab my crotch. I gagged again, making him slap me, _hard. _He brought his mouth to my ear and whispered,

"I always wondered how dad felt when he did this to you." He laughed breathily, leaning his body against mine. "I have to say Mail… It feels pretty good." I let out a sob and he threw me against the wall, pulling me back up by my shirt collar. "You worthless…" He punched me right in the face, I shouted in pain when I felt a _crack_. "Hopeless…" He punched me again, and then stomped on my ankle. "_Useless_…"

"Stop!" I wailed. "Please stop!" he picked me up again and pushed me against the other wall, starting up another round of kicking and stomping and _god _he was _strong_ and it hurt so bad…

"_PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT!_" he screamed. "_LOOK AT ME!" _Hyperventilating, I peeked up at him. He smiled again, cocking his head to the left. I jumped up without warning and scrambled towards the door, falling with a scream of pure terror as he grabbed my ankle and held me down. He straddled me, leaning over me on all fours. "You deserve it." He told me. "For Mother. You should fucking _take this _and be happy that it's all I'm giving you. You should be begging for more. You should want this, no, _need_ this. Do you know why?" he stroked my hair, brushing a hand against my shoulder blade. He suddenly slammed my head against the floor, his hand tangled in my hair. "DO YOU KNOW WHY?" he shouted. Sobbing, I shook my head desperately. He chuckled quietly and leaned down, the full weight of his body pressing against me. "Because you _killed_ her." I started crying again. He pulled my hips up, leaning back on his knees. I wasn't paying attention until he started taking off my clothes.

"No! _NO_! STOP!" I screamed, thrashing around. My entire body was rejecting him with all it had. I felt sick, literally, like I was going to throw up. He tightened his fist in my hair, pulling so hard I felt some rip out. He smashed my head against the floor a few times, until I was dizzy and I could feel warmth spreading across my head. A dark red curtain fell over my right eye, and I brought my hand to it to inspect it. My hand came away red. The smell of blood invaded my senses. Jamie pulled my shirt over my head, choking me a bit. I heard a rip. He tore off my pants, smacking my head against the floor again when I struggled to get away. My head was swimming. I felt his fingers touching, probing, feeling places that were forbidden from everyone except my Mello. He entered me.

It had never hurt like this. Even my first time hadn't hurt like this. I could feel myself tearing, bleeding, throbbing. I could feel him inside me, my own brother. I started sobbing again. I wanted to be sick. I wanted it to end. He rocked against me, sighing and grunting in pleasure. He scratched against my back, shoulders and thighs, marking me. A flare of anger built in me. Only Mello was allowed to mark me. Jamie tangled his hand in my hair again and shoved my head down, making little spots flit over my vision. I submitted as he pounded into me, the pain numbing slightly. I don't know how long it lasted. Finally, his rhythm went haywire and he started panting. I gagged violently when he came inside me, moaning loudly. He bent over me afterwards, breathing heavily, then pulled out of me.

I heard the sound of a zipper being done up, and he flipped me over. I stared blankly up at him. He smiled, looking satisfied. He slapped me all of the sudden, a sharp burning sensation taking over the left side of my face. My head lolled to the side. I knew I was giving up, but there was no point in fighting anymore. He had won. He laughed again and started licking down my chest, making me nauseous.

"I think I'll let you rest for a bit, you stupid, selfish, disgusting whore. How do you live with yourself, knowing you killed your own mother? How can you do it, Mail?" he stood and spat on me, kicking me once again. He left for a moment, and I slowly sat up, feeling his cum and my blood leak out of me. I needed to throw up. I crawled brokenly to the bathroom and retched into the toilet, my breakfast saying hello to me. I choked in fear as I heard footsteps behind me. I heard a familiar clicking noise and I froze, fear finding its way into my numb body.

I had thought something was important about guns, but I couldn't remember before. I remembered now.

Mello had forgotten to take his gun with him when he left.

I felt cold metal against my neck, sliding down my back. I shivered in disgust. Jamie grabbed my hair and dragged me back into the blood-covered hallway, laying me on my back. He ran Mello's gun down my torso, stopping under my junk, the gun positioned at my entrance. I laughed softly. This was ridiculous.

"Are you gonna rape me with a gun, Jamie? Are you really?" he growled.

"Retard!" he snapped, pistol whipping me across the face. I hissed in pain. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" he leaned down and bit my earlobe, bringing that nausea back. "You're my bitch." He whispered, "I'm going to break you, Mail. And then I'm gonna bring you back to Daddy." My heart started pounding.

"What?"

"He's still alive, Mail. And I know where he is. I'll bring you to him. He'll help me punish you properly." I screamed and he shoved the gun in my mouth, forcing himself on me again. If I thought it was bad the last time, this time was the most disturbing and painful thing I had ever experienced, because I could see the look on his face as he raped me. My head banged against the wall with the force of his thrusts, little whimpers of pain and humiliation leaving me. When he was done, he dressed himself and pinned my arms underneath me, beating me again, the gun in my mouth muffling my screams of pain.

What he didn't count on was Mello's speedy return.

I heard the front door open and I yanked one of my arms free and pulled the gun from my mouth.

"_HELP!" _I shrieked, "MELLO HELP ME!" I started sobbing with relief and I tossed the gun down the hall, out of Jamie's reach. Mello flew into the hallway, his eyes widening at the scene before him. He recovered in a second though, and grabbed the gun off the ground, clicking it and pointing it directly at Jamie. _Oh god, it was loaded the whole time._ Fresh tears started at that thought. Mello's voice brought me back to reality.

"Get the fuck off my boyfriend, you son of a bastard!" he murmured, using his scary mafia voice, Jamie stood casually and lifted his arms up. "Turn the _fuck _around!" Mello ordered. Jamie shrugged and turned, smiling at me as he backed up towards Mello. Mello grabbed his arms and twisted them behind Jamie's back. I rejoiced at the look of pain on Jamie's face. BB showed up, saw me naked and bleeding on the ground and looked at Jamie in horror. Jamie's sadistic look vanished, and he stared at BB with genuine hurt in his eyes. He looked down at me, looking sick.

"Oh, god." He whispered. "Not again." He hung his head and went limp against Mello, who dropped him in disgust, looked at B and said,

"He's all yours." Mello rushed to me and held out a hand. I sat up, looking around me for clothes. Mello kneeled on the ground beside me, handing me my jeans. I pulled them on and ran to the bathroom, practically throwing myself towards the toilet. I was violently sick about six times, until it burned and blood tainted my bile. "Matty…" Mello whispered, stroking his hands through my hair. My body froze up and I moved away from him.

"Please… Please, no more!" I begged. I pushed myself into the corner and Mello crouched in front of me.

"Hey, it's me. Shh." He placed a hand gently on my cheek, soothing me. That was something Jamie hadn't done. I felt confused and shaky. Mello held my face, so I would look at him. "It's me." He said again. I looked at him.

"Jamie hurt me again." I mumbled.

"I know." Mello's voice broke, and he took a deep breath, fixing his voice. "I know baby. I'm here now. I'm so sorry I left you two alone…" his voice cracked again, and he leaned down, placing soft kisses on my bloody face. His lips were red when he pulled away. Kisses were something Jamie never gave me either.

"It's not your fault." I reached out hesitantly to touch his hair. _This is Mello._ I thought to myself, just to clear things up. _Mello won't hurt you. Mello loves you. _"Melly?" I whispered.

"Mm-hmm?"

"You still love me, right?" I asked. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't. I was dirty, after all.

"Of course." He kissed my face again. "I love you." He whispered, over and over. He had no idea how much his words helped. We left the bathroom together, his arm strong and steady around my waist. Jamie was sitting against the wall, with BB beside him. Jamie looked pale and horrified. He looked up at me as I walked by and said,

"Oh my god. I'm so sorry Mail. I just… snapped. I didn't even realize until B came. I'm so sorry. Please, Mail, I'm sorry!" I looked at him with disgust and said,

"My name is Matt."


	22. Being Beautiful

**HEEYYY!**

**Kay so after that heavy chapter, there were some questions about the character Jamie and his intentions. I was trying to convey kind of a multiple personality disorder behavior in Jamie. I.e, he's good Jamie when he's around other people, but when he's with someone who's an image of his past (For example, Matt or their father) he turns into bad Jamie. So, brightnight003, he **_**is **_**kind of crazy, but when he snaps out of it, Jamie feels really bad. I hope that makes sense :S And to Glimfire- Yup pills are probably required. ;P**

**Oh, and to reviewer Awesomenessknowsnobounds- Mello didn't shoot him for a number of reasons. 1. He didn't want to disturb Matt. 2. He didn't want to break BB's heart. and 3. I still need Jamie for my story. XD Don't worry, karma may be a bitch, but she's also cruel justice. :)**

**So for all of you who are still confused, here's a chapter that will hopefully clear some things up! And it's kinda fluffy. **

**And just out of curiosity, who actually reads my author notes? Cause I'm giving you extra love. :P**

**Love you guys! :D**

* * *

><p>Matt paced around the room, limping and shaking and smoking. I leaned against the wall and went between watching his movements and looking at Jamie, who was sitting on the couch. He had his head down, and he was crying softly. BB looked confused and distraught and ready to stab someone. He was standing beside me, wringing his hands and grinding his teeth. Once Matt reached for his fourth cig, I broke the silence.<p>

"Matt." He jumped, and dropped his unlit cigarette. I sighed. "That's enough for today, you're gonna get sick." He pouted, I made my no-nonsense face, and he placed his pack of cigarettes on the table along with the one that fell on the floor. He carefully walked past Jamie, who made no move to touch him and crossed the room to put his arms around me. I held him and stroked his hair, which made him tense a bit. "It's me." I whispered, and he relaxed a bit. I kissed his cheek, and then looked at Jamie. "So, want to explain what happened?" Jamie took a few shaky breaths and looked up, tears running down his face.

"I don't know." He croaked.

"That's not _good enough!_" I shouted, drawing my gun. Matt jumped out of my arms and BB looked terrified.

"Mel!" Matt exclaimed. He gently took the gun from me and left the room to hide it in the kitchen somewhere. "I think we need to solve this with words, not guns." He said quietly. I looked up at him.

My poor baby. He smiled at me softly, his bottom lip splitting a bit. He was starting to get a black eye, and I think his nose was broken. He had a burn on his collarbone that was in a circle, there had been a cut on his head that had made him bleed everywhere. I had fixed it as best as I could, and stopped the bleeding. There was still blood in his hair, clumping it together. He had a limp from his sore ankle, and also from being raped. I bit my lip and held back tears. Matt always called himself weak, but I knew better. To be able to stand there, smiling, after his worst nightmare came true and did _horrible_ things to him. To be able to stand there, right beside the man who did it, with nothing more than a small limp and a smile on his face, made me know better. Matt was strong. He held himself together. But the look in his eyes let me know that he was dying inside. I could feel my heart breaking as I looked at him.

"Matt." I said quietly. He smiled at me, but his smile faded away after a while. I held out my arms, making a ghost smile cross his face. He hugged me, hiding his face, nuzzling into me. I slid down to the floor, taking him with me. I pulled him into my lap (I don't give a fucking shit if he's bigger than me. I can comfort him when he's hurting.) and held him, gently, letting him breathe in my scent and calm down. I gritted my teeth. "Okay, so now that I'm weaponless, explain to me, what happened?"

"It-it happened before, when I saw my dad again." Jamie stuttered, wiping tears from his face. Matt tensed so much he felt like a rock in my arms.

"Shh, shh. He won't find you, I promise. I'm not leaving you again." I soothed him, holding him closer. He took a few deep breaths and relaxed a bit.

"Seeing him just set something off in me, I don't know what happened, but this other me took over, the angry me. I kind of lost my mind for a while." Jamie looked at BB guiltily. "I did this to someone else that night too, but less… you know… harsh." He took a breath. "I didn't beat them as much." His eyes flicked over to Matt, looking remorseful. "Ever since I saw Matt, that other me started talking to me in my head, telling me to hurt him…" he broke off, holding his head in his hands. He started crying again. "I didn't want to!" he sobbed. "I tried so hard to fight it, but it won. I don't even remember what happened when…" he glanced over at Matt, who had started shaking. I tightened my arms around him, and he leaned into me gratefully. BB walked over to Jamie and stood over him, shuddering.

"Can you hear him now?" B asked, sounding hurt. Jamie tried to look at him, and went into a fresh round of sobbing.

"Yes." His voice broke. He looked over at Matt desperately. "Matt, I would never want to do something like that to anyone, much less you. I'm so, so sorry! You have no idea how sorry I am!" he started crying again, and Matt had done his stone-tensing thing. I ran my fingers down his spine gently.

"You don't have to talk to him." I whispered to Matt. I looked over at BB and Jamie. BB was standing there, looking torn, his right hand reached out, about to touch Jamie, and the other clenched into a fist by his side.

"I don't know…" BB whispered. "Whether to hug you or kill you." He tilted his head to the side.

"Jamie." Matt murmured. Everyone in the room except for Matt jumped. We weren't expecting him to speak. "What did you do with that other person?" Jamie looked baffled.

"W-well when I snapped out of it, I was standing in an alleyway, and there was this girl lying on the ground beside me. So I crouched down and asked her what happened. She had some of her clothes off and she was bleeding. It was obvious that she had been raped. She screamed when she saw me and stood up. She pushed me into a wall and shouted 'You did this to me!' and ran away." He let out a breath. "It was really dark, so I doubt she saw my face, and no one came looking for me. But the thing that let me know that I really _had_ done it was that the voice in my head was gone, like it was satisfied." He swallowed, tapping his fingers against his knee.

"Is it still there?" Matt asked.

"W-what?"

"_The voice!_ Is it still there?"

"No, it's gone." Matt sighed against my shoulder. I petted his hair. I leaned back, letting Matt lie against me. "What are you going to do with me?" Jamie asked, sitting up and looking at me. I touched Matt's back, pleased that he hadn't flinched away from me.

"Do you want to press charges?" I asked Matt.

"No." We were all flabbergasted by that.

"You _don't_?" Matt looked up at me. His goggles had been discarded at one point, probably during the rape, and I could see his green eyes clearly. They were calm and clear.

"He punishes himself enough. I don't need the government to do that for me." He brought his hands up to his face and rubbed his eyes, hissing when he pressed against his darkening eye. "I'm tired, Mello. Can we go to bed?" I look at him for a moment, my mouth open. He stopped rubbing his eyes and looked straight into mine. "Please?" he asked. I wasn't used to seeing his eyes so much, and they were so expressive. They were begging me. I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"Let's have a shower first. Get you all cleaned up, okay?" he considered this, and then nodded slightly. I carefully pulled him up with me and let him walk into the bathroom. I stepped into the living room for a moment. "Are you two staying here tonight?" BB was sitting beside Jamie, holding his hand. A wave of sudden respect flowed through me. Beyond Birthday was a tough man.

"I'll watch him." BB promised, nodding to me. I half grinned and nodded then went back into the bathroom. When I walked through the door, I found Matt standing in front of the mirror with a razor on his arm and blood running down his hand.

"Matt!" I gasped. He looked up at me, his expression hurt.

"I didn't mean to…" he whispered. I grabbed a towel and pressed it to his wrist, holding it down tightly to stop the bleeding.

"Matt, what made you do that?" I wrapped the towel around his arm and held his face. His bottom lip was quivering adorably and he looked down at me with tearful eyes.

"It hurts." He whimpered. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him, petting his hair and letting him cry against my shoulder. He didn't need to act tough with me, and he knew it.

"I know," I whispered. "I know you're hurting. But it's no good to do that to yourself. You need to stick around. I need you here. And I know that sounds selfish, but Mail, I don't know what I'd do if you weren't here with me."

"I'm sorry." He sounded like he was a child again, and it broke my heart.

"It's okay. Just don't do it again, love." I held his face and wiped his tears away. He laughed softly, leaning down to kiss me. A shock went through my body at the unexpected contact. "What was that for?" I asked, smiling against his lips. He brought his uninjured arm to his face and wiped his eyes.

"I hate being scared, Mel. I've spent a lot of my life being scared. But the best years of my life, the ones I've spent with you, were the only times I ever felt safe. I associate fear with times I'm not with you. I don't know how I'm going to get used to this, being scared when I'm around you…" he took my hand and put it on his chest, over his M.K scars. "When I was young, my father used to molest and rape me and make Jamie watch." My breath caught in my throat. "I was always scared of him, of Jamie, of both of them. When I got out of there, out of that life, and met you, you showed me what love was, and that there was a way to be with someone without being scared." I let out a shaky breath, feeling hot tears leave my eyes. He looked at me sadly. "What am I supposed to do with two opposite parts of my life in one house?" he sighed and leaned his head against my shoulder, moving my hand down his waist and to his hip, "When you touch me… I think about what they did. My body is tainted now, after you cleaned it. I don't know if I'll ever be clean again…" I took a few deep breaths. All these years…

"Come on." I whispered. "Let's clean you up." He looked at me. I brought my hands to the hem of his striped shirt and started pulling it off. He just started at me, and then smiled. He raised his arms so I could pull it over his head. I dropped his shirt beside us, looking over his torso. There were bruises and scrapes forming on his skin, under his scars, scattered all over his body. They were marks of violence, of pain and fear. I looked into his eyes and placed my hands on his chest. "You're beautiful to me." I whispered. "No matter how dirty you feel, Mail, you will always be beautiful to me." I ran my hands slowly over his chest, and he closed his eyes, a tear escaping from his right eye. I kissed his cheek, capturing his tear. "I will never hurt you. I will never leave you again. I owe you that." I told him.

"Mihael…" My hands had reached his jeans and I was undoing his button.

"Shh." I unzipped his jeans and slipped them over his thighs. His breathing was getting faster, but not out of lust. Out of fear. He hadn't had the time or state of mind to put on underwear when he was scrambling to get dressed before, so he stood there, naked before me. And he had never looked more beautiful. There were bruises in the shapes of fingerprints on his hips and thighs, marks that Jamie- his own blood and DNA- had left behind. He was covered in marks, scratches and bruises and whatnot all over him, but he stood tall, and he stood steady. I didn't touch him. He opened his eyes.

"I won't hurt you." I whispered. He stared at me, waiting. I kept my hands to myself. Finally, he smiled again, life returning to his eyes.

"Promise you won't touch me until I say so? Touch me in _that_ way, I mean." I nodded.

"Whatever you need." He moved closer, his hands in my hair and on my face, tracing my scar with his thumb.

"Then it's your turn." He breathed, leaning down to kiss my scar.

His fingers made their way down my body to the bottom of my t-shirt, where he pulled it off and placed it with his own. He struggled a bit with the laces of my leather pants, making me laugh.

"Need help?" I asked. He chuckled a bit.

"Probably." I pulled off my pants and stepped out of them, looking up at Matt.

And then it was just us, Matt and me, standing together. I had never felt so in love. We stared at each other like we had never seen the other before. Matt smiled softly, his eyes full of love. He took my hand, lacing his fingers through mine, and brought me to the shower. He turned on the water, letting go of my hand so he could fix the temperature. He stepped in and motioned with his hand for me to follow. I stood behind him, the spray of water wetting my skin. I watched as he stood under the warm water, washing the blood out of his hair and off of his skin. He turned to face me, his hair wet and clinging to his face, his eyelashes holding water. He held my hands and brought me under the spray of water with him. Our chests touched. He pulled me closer so we were pressed together, water flowing over us. He leaned down and caught my mouth with his, pulling me in for a deep kiss that tasted of clean water, soap and smoke. I lived for that taste. He held my hands the whole time he was kissing me. When he pulled away, he was short of breath. It hitched in his throat and came out in short pants, blowing across my chest and my neck.

"I'm still confused. My brain feels dizzy. I want to touch you, but I'm scared..." he whispered, his breath hot on my lips. I got on my toes and stole another soft kiss from his lips.

"You should sleep. You need to rest." Matt nodded and let go of me to turn off the water. I felt empty and clingy when he wasn't near me. I stepped out first, offering him his favourite giant fuzzy towel. He smiled and let me wrap it around his shoulders, leaving a kiss on the tip of his nose. He shivered, teeth clicking together while he stood and waited for me to find another towel big enough. We walked to our bedroom, being quiet so we wouldn't disturb BB and Jamie. They were on the couch, talking in hushed tones. We crept into the room and I closed the door. I handed Matt a light, baggy t-shirt and some loose sweat pants. I dug around our pile of clean clothes while he dressed, and pulled on a pair of Matt's soft, faded Tetris boxers. He laughed softly from across the room, causing me to look up. He was drying his hair, smiling innocently at me. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a black tank top, pulling it over my head. I pulled my hair into a loose ponytail and got in bed, watching Matt limp clumsily around the room in search for his beloved DS. "Babe." I interrupted his search.

"Mm?" I could imagine dog ears poking out of his hair when he popped up beside the bed after digging under it. I held up his beaten black DS.

"It's right here, silly." Matt facepalmed.

"I swear to god, Mels. Fuck my brain sometimes!" I shoved that weird mental-image out of my brain very quickly.

"No thanks." Matt sat down gingerly, hissing a bit in pain. He got somewhat comfy, then held out a hand for his gaming thing. I shook my head and showed him bandage and gauze that I had taken from the bathroom. He sighed and held out his arm. The cut was pretty deep, and it actually scared me more than they usually do. This one looked like it had a purpose. I didn't bother cleaning it, seeing as we just had a shower. I covered it up and wrapped it in gauze, keeping it tight. I gave him his DS when I was satisfied with his bandage and rested my head on his lap, watching him. He made his usual gaming faces, a mixture of furrowed eyebrows and expressions of joy. Eventually, his battery died and the screen sopped flashing that blue light on his face. I was secretly relieved. I liked the way the warm light from our lamp looked on his face. It made him look softer than he already did. I think I found Matt the most attractive at times like these, times when he was completely relaxed and unguarded. It brought me great pride and joy to know that I could make him feel so safe. I remember once, a few months ago (When we first got back together) I came home from shopping, walked into the living room area and found Matt sprawled out on the couch, playing his game.

_"Hey gorgeous." I whispered, leaning down to run a hand through his hair and kiss his forehead._

_"Stop talking to yourself, Mels. Someone's gonna think you're crazy." he called to me while I brought the groceries I had just bought into the kitchen. I smiled and blushed a bit. Matt was the king of compliments._

_"I was talking to you, you silly redhead!" Matt came into the kitchen, feigning shock. He put one hand over his chest and the other lifted weakly to his forehead. He leaned back like he was going to faint._

_"Who? Little old me?" I smacked his arm and he wrapped them around me, pulling me close for a long, lazy kiss. It was one of those kisses that made my knees weak. He braced his hands on the counter, leaning forward. I was effectively trapped. "You know, I really love you." he said that so casually, but with so much meaning. I snaked my arms around his neck and kissed him quickly._

_"I love you too. Now go play your game while I put this bullshit away." Matt stood up straight and saluted me._

_"Yes sir!" I slapped his ass while he walked away, laughing. After I put the bullshit away, I stood at the doorway of the kitchen, looking at Matt. His game was on the table, and he was holding a picture we kept in a frame on top of the TV. I knew that because it was the only framed photo in the apartment at the time. The picture was of us kissing, with Matt's hands on my face while I held the camera away from us with one hand. It was kind of blurry, mixing us together. I loved it. Matt looked at me, and for a moment, he didn't smile. He didn't frown. But he spoke to me with his eyes. _

_It was one of those moments. He had his goggles in his hair, so I could see his eyes. He looked peaceful and loving and so heartbreakingly true. I smiled at him from where I stood. God, I loved him so much. He grinned halfway, making this little lopsided smile he still does sometimes._

I was pulled into the present by Matt stroking my hair.

"What's wrong?" he whispered.

"Nothing. I was thinking about you." Matt smiled at me with his eyes.

"Good thoughts?"

"The best." He sunk down beside me, our bodies brushing and starting pleasure shivers down my spine.

"You know," Matt sighed. "I always feel the most like me when I'm with you." I smiled at him and he kissed me again.

"We should sleep." I mumbled when he pulled away.

"You're right." he continued to kiss along my jawline. He kissed along me until he could rest his head on my chest. He pressed his ear to my chest, making a face of concentration.

"What are you doing?"

"Listening for your heart." his expression turned to relief. "There we go." I laughed softly, tangling my hands in his hair affectionately.

"I feel like I'm falling in love with you all over again." I told him. He peeked up at me.

"Yeah?" I nodded. He smiled one of the biggest, cutest smiles I've ever seen on him. "You really meant it when you said you wouldn't leave me again?" I nodded again. Matt cuddled up to me, intertwining his legs with mine. We lay there quietly, when Matt started laughing suddenly.

"What?" I was confused. He giggled adorably.

"I just realised how fucked up I am." he whispered. I clicked my tongue in disapproval.

"We'll fix this." I insisted.

"We'll fix _me._" I stroked his hair and kissed him gently.

"Baby," I said gently. "You dont need to be fixed. You're perfect the way you are." he smiled happily at me and pulled his ams around me, holding me close.

We fell asleep together, with the warm light of our bedside lamp lighting up my angel's face in the most beautiful way possible. As I drifted off, I remember thinking...

_What comes next?_

* * *

><p><strong>I hope you liked this chapter! ^.^ I enjoyed writing it. I hope it clears up issues with Jamie for you guys, and don't worry, Matt's on a steady road to recovery! Also, this isn't the end of the story. I have more ideas for this one that need to be published! :O<strong>

**Love ya! XOXOXOXO**

**P.S, LONGEST CHAPTER EVAR! OVER 4,100 WORDS! Z-O-M-G! *insert tearful happy-face here* -^O^- (This guy is dancing)**

**K THNX BAI!**


	23. Not Your Fault

**Heey! So my last two chapters got TONS of reviews and I just wanna say THANK YOU to those people and to those of you who read my Author Notes! To answer some of your reviews-**

**brightnight003, you can absolutely use some of my writing, as long as you mention me :3 And yeah, I was thinking of writing a BB and Jamie chapter actually. STOP READING MY MIND! XD**

**MyBeautifulBlackHeart- ZOMG THANK YOU! I always try to improve my writing. I have more plans for this story, so don't expect it to be over just yet. ;)**

**Glimfire- Lol, I forgive your giggling. I tried to lighten it up a bit. And I will buy Jamie a straight jacket. *Pulls one out of nowhere.* Here ya go Jay! *Forces it onto him and maybe makes it too tight :P* Jamie:WTF?**

**LooksBreedLove- THANK YOU! HUGS! I'D MAKE A HEART BUT THOSE DON'T WORK! (Teehee it took me like five minutes to understand your name. It's cute :3)**

**Awesomenessknowsnobounds- Yay! Thanks ya! And I'm still not sure what I'm going to do with Jamie. But something's gonna happen.**

**Mid-Summer Romance- Sorry for making you cry . Lol your second review made me laugh. Yeah they're pretty much the best couple EVAR (Matt and Mello forever!) Everybody likes puppies :P (That was supposed to be a lame way of saying everyone loves Matt... Why do I even try sometimes -_-) And aww you're sweet. I think I love you. Sorry for annoying you with my awesomeness. ^-^**

**The song used is Not Your Fault by AWOLnation (Who I LOVE!) and I DO NOT OWN IT AT ALL!**

**Kayy so since I had two serious chapters in a row, here's some fluff, dirty jokes and yaoi along with a look into BB and Jamie's relationship! I'll be switching POV's in this one a lot. :D I LOVE YOU GUYS!**

**ALSO! This chapter has over 6000 words O.O**

BB's POV

"Ungh! Mells! To the left! Ohh _yeahh_ that's the spot! Do that again! Right there! Almost done! OHHHHH! C'mon, I know you can do better than that!"

"I'm trying, Matt! I just can't do it!"

"Bend like this. No, there. Yeah! See?"

"I _can't_!"

"It's okay; we haven't done this one in a while. Remember- Up, down, left. Up, down, right."

"Like this?" Mello asked. Matt let out a breathy _'Ohh yeah!'_

"Perfect!" There were a few pants and grunts, and a joyful cheer. "There you go!" Matt encouraged. "Just keep that rhythm."

"Is this good?" A contented sigh could be heard from the living room.

"Beautiful." More grunting and Matt called out, "Oh, here we go! Here it comes! OH MY GOD YES!"

Jamie and I had gone out for a date, and when we came home, we got trapped while Matt and Mello did... Well... that... in the living room.

"HIGH SCORE!" They screamed, making Jamie and I look at each other in confusion. I walked into the room and found Matt on the couch with Mello on his lap. Mello was holding an X-box controller. They both looked overjoyed.

"What the fuck is going on in here?" Jamie asked, leaning against the wall beside me.

"Mello was playing a game! And he did really well!" Matt hugged Mello from behind, making Mello blush. Matt was so cute sometimes.

"It sounded like you were having sex!" I chimed in, making Jamie blush and shift uncomfortably. M&M laughed with me though.

It was a few days since Jamie snapped. The voice in Jamie's head was gone, and he and Matt were slowly losing the wall that had been thrown back up. Matt was more relaxed with Mello near him, and vice versa. Mello seemed to like me, and I liked him too. He was so high-strung, and it was fun to pull his strings. He and I had a good time, though. Matt was such a sweetheart it was hard not to like him, and he always blushed at my dirty jokes. It was the funniest thing when he joined in with me.

Hey, you're probably wondering how Jamie and I met. Well shut the fuck up and calm down and I'll tell you.

I was having a shitty day, and I was feeling lonely, so I went to get a drink. I went to a bar out of town to get away from my problems. I took a seat at the bar and slumped over.

"Tough night?" a rough voice asked me. I looked up and liked what I saw. A tall, almost ginger man was drying a glass and smiling empathetically at me. He had cold brown eyes filled with secrets. That fascinated me. Usually, brown eyes were warm. And mystery excited me. He had just enough stubble to look unkept and sexy. The Sexy Bartender was wearing a tight grey shirt that showed off muscled arms. I sighed.

"You have no idea. What drink goes well with dead brother?" Sexy Bartender's eyes softened.

"My condolences. And a nice big shot of vodka, or tequila, or maybe a rum and coke?" Sexy Bartender offered. "On the house." I smiled.

"I'll have all of the above and I'll pay for two." he grinned and left to make my drinks. I checked out his ass. _I wonder if he's gay..._

"There you go." he placed my drinks in front of me and leaned against the counter, looking at me. "The name's Jamison by the way." he held out a hand.

"I'm Beyond." he blinked those cold-warm eyes at me in confusion.

"Pardon?" I smiled evilly, noting the shiver that went down Sexy Jamie's spine.

"Beyond. It's my name." He tilted his head to the side. It was very cute and sexy.

"Interesting. Tell me, Beyond, do you wear contacts?" I was slightly surprised. No one had asked me that so straight-forward before.

"Nope. My eyes are naturally like this." I was used to my eyes creeping people out. Sexy Jamie just looked curious.

"I don't believe you." he said, narrowing his eyes. He looked slightly scary like that, and I'd never admit it, but it kinda turned me on.

"Okay." I amended. "I'll prove it." I stuck my finger on my eyeball, then pulled it away to show that there was no lens on my finger. Sexy Jamie looked impressed, then disgusted.

"It's really gross that you can do that so easily." he said. I shrugged.

"It's one of the many things my talented fingers can do, Jamie." I winked at him, just a test to see if he would be interested. Sexy Jamie turned bright red and turned back to the bar, stuttering. And there started an amazing relationship.

I started coming back to that bar just to see my Sexy Jamie. We talked and flirted, got to know each other. Over time, his cold eyes grew warmer when I was around, but those secrets remained. He would blush like a schoolgirl when I hit on him. I still couldn't tell if he was gay. One night, about three months into knowing him, I decided to ask him.

"So," I started, taking a sip of my beer. He leaned over the counter, getting closer to me so he could hear better. "Which do you prefer? Men or women?" Sexy Jamie flushed and looked down at the counter.

"Men. And men only." he looked up at me from under his eyelashes and laughed. "Girls are too much work." I nodded in agreement. "What about you?"

"Oh, honey! Men!" I waved my hand around flamboyantly. Jamie laughed adorably. I calmed down and he stepped closer, looking shy.

"So... Have you been hitting on me all this time?" I smiled deviously.

"You could tell?" He grinned this crazy, sexy lopsided grin.

"I'm not allowed to flirt with my customers." His voice suggested that he didn't give a shit.

"Well, obviously you broke that rule." he smiled, but it disappeared and his eyes trailed to my lips.

"I want to kiss you." he said. Those five, simple words set my whole body on fire.

"You can't do that here though." What was supposed to be a sarcastic sentence came out breathy and needy. He looked into my eyes. All the coldness was gone now.

"Can you wait until my shift is done?" he asked. I nodded. He fixed a suggestive smile on me and walked away slowly, moving down the bar to take an order. He winked at me and then focused on his job. Through the rest of his shift, he sent smiles towards me, 'accidentally' brushing my hand with his, bending over and stretching a lot. It was so extremely frustrating that by the end of the night, I was ready to jump across the bar and fuck him senseless. Finally, he finished cleaning up and gestured for me to follow him to the back of the bar. We stepped into a separate room, full of coats and whatnot from the staff. He locked the door and looked at me.

"Well?" I insisted, impatient. He smiled and stepped forward slowly. His hands met my hips and traced their way up my waist, then down again. I shivered at the feel of his hands on my body. He leaned down and kissed me very softly, his tongue poking out to make its way into my mouth. I bit his tongue and pulled it into my mouth, sucking on it. Jamie let out a gasp and a long, soft moan, pulling me closer. And in that split second, we went from suppressed lust to wild passion.

I was pressed against the wall, Jamie thrusting his hips against me, with my legs around his waist, trading sighs and spit and experienced tongues. My hands roamed his shoulders and his hair, pulling and scratching in my own rough way of love. It turns out Jamie was a biter, nipping my lips and tongue and neck. Jamie bent his head down to work at taking off my shirt, his fingers pulling desperately at the white material. I caught my breath and tried to speak.

"N-no. We need... Bed... Where do you live?" Jamie moaned in frustration and bit at my collarbone. I gasped in pleasure. Fuck you, I like it rough.

"Down the street." He answered.

"Come on then." He dropped me gently and gathered what he needed. We walked to his car, with his hand in my back pocket. He explored my inner thighs while he drove one-handed. We made out and walked at the same time through the parking lot. We were jittery as we took the elevator to the floor his apartment was on. He opened his door impatiently and locked it behind him, pulling off his jacket and picking me up. He carried me to the bedroom, biting and sucking on me the whole time. He placed me on the bed, then pulled me on top of him. I straddled him, giving him a confused look.

"I like to bottom." he explained, panting softly. I smiled.

"Good, cause I planned on fucking you into tomorrow." Jamie groaned in agreement. I yanked off his shirt, letting myself get harder at the sight of his gorgeous body. (How much did he work out?) Then I started stripping myself. He pulled off his dark blue jeans and waited until I was naked. He then pulled me into a searing kiss, his tongue flicking out to meet mine. We ravaged each other's mouths for a moment, until I couldn't take it anymore. I pulled away, cackling like a mad man. Jamie's eyes went wide, like he was scared, but the way his dick lifted was enough to let me know that he secretly liked it.

"You're insane." he breathed, laughing slightly. I bent down and whispered into his ear, my teeth brushing his earlobe.

"You like it." I growled and bit his ear, loving the sharp cry that left Jamie's swollen lips.

"Oh, god, take me!" he begged. I smiled maliciously.

"As you wish." I murmured in a low voice, watching Jamie shiver. I stuck three fingers in my mouth briefly. I could tell he liked it rough too. I stuck two fingers inside him without a warning, receiving a cry of pain and pleasure as a reward. I scissored him, leaning down to lick at one of his nipples.

"Fuck... More!" Jamie moaned, bucking against my fingers. I added a third one and pushed them in as far as they would go, until I brushed a certain part inside him and he started moaning. "Oh my god..." he whispered.

"Do you want me?" I purred, sucking on his nipple. Jamie was panting, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

"Yes! Please, fuck me!" I smiled and pulled my fingers away, picking up Jamie's long legs and putting them over my shoulders.

"Have any lube?" I asked, rubbing myself at his entrance. Jamie sighed and reached to his bedside table, pulling out some lube and handing it to me. I dropped his legs and uncapped the bottle, squirting some onto my hand and rubbing it on my hard member. I hissed at the feeling of my hand on myself and stroked myself a few times. Jamie moaned in exasperation.

"Hurry up!" I looked up at Jamie and had to try my hardest not to laugh. He was spread out in front of me, his back arched and his brown eyes melting with want. I kissed up his chest and caught his mouth with mine, distracting him. Then, with a quick snap of my hips, I entered him all the way to the hilt, making him sigh and moan in pleasure. "Oh, my _god_..." he panted. "Move." It was fast and hard and passionate, and I'm not going into very much detail, because Jamie will kill me. (He moans like a whore and man oh man does he _beg_ for it!) Actually, screw it! Have some details!

As we approached our climax, Jamie clawed desperately at my chest and shoulders, whining softly. I had brought him to the edge and then stopped three times already, and I had to hold back my release a few times as well, so we were both panting and shaking from pleasure. His longs legs were trembling on either side of me, his thighs twitching as I rested my hands on them, rolling my hips in a circle. He moaned wantonly and whispered my name. I knew it would be worth all this torture. It always is. I aimed for his prostate again and thrusted slowly, just barely brushing his sweet spot.

"Do you want to come, my sweet little bitch?" Oh, and I had figured out that Jamie was into dirty talk. He whimpered under me.

"Please!" I laughed low in my throat, and surprised him by breaking the slow pace I had set and repeatedly pounding into him, striking his prostate with deadly intent. He practically screamed in pleasure, pulling at my hair and scratching at my skin, leaving marks. This only fueled my lust more, causing me to bend over him, grabbing his hips in order to thrust harder inside him. Jamie tossed his head back, his eyes squeezing shut. He grabbed tightly into my arms, his nails digging into my biceps. "Oh, oh fuck! Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck! Oh my god! AH! Beyond!" He arched his back until I thought it was going to snap and tightened like a vice around my sensitive cock. He let out the sexiest sound I have ever heard and came all over our stomachs and his chest. I managed to be proud of him for using my strange name in bed before I was struck by a wall of blinding pleasure.

"Great Scott!" I shouted, losing my rhythm as I spilled into him. Once I calmed down enough to move, I pulled out of him and lay beside him. Jamie pulled me into his arms and bit my earlobe softly.

"Great Scott?" he asked, laughing softly. His breath so close to my ear made me shiver.

"First thing that came to my head." I panted. He pulled me down so my head was on his chest and put his arms around my shoulders, leaving a soft kiss on my head.

"So…" he whispered. "I know after sex isn't the best time to discuss relationships, but are we official now?" I breathed a laugh.

"Yeah sure. But first…" I moved up and leaned my head on my hand, looking at him. His eyes were completely melted, but the secrets were still there. "Tell me what those secrets in your eyes are." He smiled sadly.

"My only secrets are in my past." He murmured. "I had a bad childhood." I touched his hair empathetically.

"Didn't we all?" he stared at me for a long moment, studying my face.

"Do you have any siblings?" he asked. "Other than your brother?" I shook my head.

"Nope. Just him. We were twins, identical, except for our eyes." I grinned at the thought of Lawliet. "He was a smart little bastard. He was the best detective out there, and he was murdered by his partner." I looked back at Jamie. "What about you?" his eyes darkened.

"I had a little brother… or have a little brother. I'm not sure which. I haven't seen him since I was fifteen. My father was… not a nice man. He blamed my brother for making our mother sick. Our dad used to do horrible things to him, and he made me do horrible things to him. That poor kid, he must be so messed up. And then one night, my dad fed our mom poison, and he left her with my brother. He took off with me and brought me with him, and I lived with him until I was eighteen, when I ran away. I've been on my own ever since." I started at him in horror, then held him in a tight hug.

"That's terrible. I'm so sorry!" I burrowed my head into his hair, comforting him. We spent the rest of the night together, just talking, until we fell asleep.

We started having 'sleepovers' more and more until I just moved into Jamie's apartment. Three months after that, we moved to New York, and Jamie got a job at a video game store. Three days after that, we met Matt and Mello and you know the rest.

So, after all that, I'm going back to what I was talking about, thank you very much.

I threw myself onto the couch beside M&M (I like calling them that) and said sweetly,

"So, can you two young, angelic, gorgeous children go into your room so Mommy and Daddy don't burn your innocent eyes while we have hot, dirty, kinky sex?" Jamie yelled in disapproval,

"Beyond!" Matt looked confused and asked,

"Mommy and Daddy?" and Mello burst into laughter and exclaimed,

"_Innocent?_" I threw my head back and cackled, then shooed M&M away.

"I was serious, go away." Matt dashed off, yelling,

"I need an adult! I need an adult!" and Mello rolled his eyes, following him. I leaned back on the couch, happy to find Jamie already crawling onto the couch.

"And now to take care of you…" I murmured.

Mello's POV

When I walked into our room, Matt was sitting on our bed with a pillow behind his back, playing his game. He looked up and smiled, the harsh light of his DS reflecting off of his goggles. I stood with a hand on my hip and studied him.

It turned out that his nose had NOT been broken, and his black eye was slowly but surely fading. His newest cuts and scrapes were healing, adding to his list of scars. He was still a bit tender when he moved, the bruises his brother left taking their toll on his body. For the most part, the limping had stopped, and Matt was only slightly careful when sitting down. Looking at him then made it apparent to me that I had no self-control.

"Put your game down." I said simply. Matt's smile faded into a look of confusion. He paused his game and then placed his DS on the bedside table. "Take your goggles off." He pulled off his goggles, hanging them around his neck and shook out his shaggy red hair. I tilted my head to the side. "Take your shirt off." His eye brows came together in confusion, but he did as I asked, showing off his bruised, skinny body. I licked my lips in appreciation. "Mmm…" I moaned, crawling across the bed to straddle him. I buried my face in his strawberry scented hair and laughed. "Strawberries?" I asked quizzically. Matt made a frustrated noise.

"It's moisturizing!" I pulled away so I could laugh out loud, which gained me a shouted 'Shut the fuck up! Having sex here!' from the living room. Matt giggled softly and I covered my mouth so I wouldn't laugh.

If Matt and I were walking down the street, I admit that I would definitely look _way_ gayer than he does. In fact, Matt looks completely straight. However, that is so _not_ true that it makes me laugh.

Matt is gay. (Well duh.) But Matt is _so_ gay that he puts _my_ gay antics to shame. He uses women's shampoo sometimes. He blow dries his hair almost every time he takes a shower. He drools over actors and video game characters (all men of course). He sometimes lisps (which is the most hilarious thing _ever_!). He walks like a gay man. Sometimes he does the whole limp wrist thing when he's getting into a topic. He watches wedding shows and cries at romantic comedies. He claps his hands when he laughs. Sometimes he jumps up and down when he's excited. I've heard him squeal before. I even caught him with some girly fashion magazine… And he had been reading it! And yes, sometimes when we're alone, he wears an apron when he's cooking.

I tangled my hands in his hair, holding his head softly.

"You're so gay." I laughed. Matt faked an offended face and pulled away to look at me.

"You say that like it's a bad thing. You should be glad I like dick!" I grabbed his face and pulled him in for a long, desperate kiss. I wound my arms around his neck and he rested his hands on my hips as he pulled me closer. I pulled away after a moment to breathe, tilting my head back so Matt had access to my neck. He kissed down my throat, breathing heavily.

"The only dick you're allowed to like is mine." I panted, letting out a soft whimper as his long hands made their way to the backs of my thighs. Matt pulled away to smile lazily at me, running his fingers up and down my thighs.

"That's fine with me." I leaned down and caught his lips with mine, nipping his bottom lip lightly.

"You're so sexy." I whispered, my voice sounding rough. Matt growled playfully, sending shivers down my spine. He pulled me closer, so my stomach was flush against his, then changed his mind and laid me down underneath him. He slowly crawled up my body, pulling off my loose white t-shirt and kissing my torso as he made his way up my body. He set to work on my neck, kissing and sucking softly on my skin. I was making some embarrassing noises. He only pulled away to remove his goggles completely, and then he pressed softly against me, our skin rubbing together and sending shocks of pleasure through my body. Matt panted lightly against my ear and whispered,

"Mel… I want… I want you to make love to me." Surprise took over me and I absently kissed Matt back when his lips met mine.

"I- Are you sure?" I asked, both excited and worried. Matt pulled away and looked at me. From my position, his hair hung around his face like a halo, and his eyes looked so impossibly green and beautiful. His lips were parted and little pants left them, his breath ghosting over my face. He traced the tendons in my forearms, meeting my hands with his, and holding them carefully, our fingers intertwined.

"Yes. I need you to take me back. I want you." I gazed at him for a moment, then grinned. I gently hooked my legs around his waist and pulled him down so his hips pressed against mine.

"I love you Mail." I whispered. His mouth met mine again with frenzied, unabashed passion. I flipped us over and straddled Matt, half running my hands through his hair and half holding myself up. I gently raked my nails down his stomach and he pulled his mouth away from mine to cry out in desperation. One of his hands found my hair and brought my face closer so his tongue could wrestle with mine, and his other hand ran slowly up my waist, nails digging in slightly. Being used to having sex multiple times a day and then going to absolutely no sexual contact for a few days really wears on a man. I changed the way our legs were positioned and spread Matt's legs softly with my own, rubbing my clothed erection against his. Matt moaned in appreciation.

"Ahn, Mihael!" He gasped. I moaned wantonly. Fuck, I didn't care if I was just humping him like some kind of horny teenager, it was _good_. "_Please!_" he whimpered.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! Just- Please! I love you, I need to remember what you loving me feels like." My breath caught in my throat. I ceased my dry-humping and reached for the button of his jeans. When I looked up at him, Matt was biting his lip, his hair tousled and sexy and adorable. I undid his pants and slipped them off, kissing along his skinny thighs until my nose brushed against the tent in his boxers. He sighed softly as I brought a hand up to touch him. "Mihael," he murmured, his voice velvety soft.

"It's me." I answered back, shuffling around to take off my own pants. I was, as always, going commando, so the only thing that lie in the way of sweet release was Matt's boxers. I kissed his hips as I pulled off the soft fabric. Matt let out an incredibly sexy breathy moan as I took his erection into my mouth, swirling my tongue around him.

"Oh, fuck…" he whispered covering his face with his hands. I pulled my mouth away from him and reached up to take his hands away.

"No," I said, dragging my tongue up his navel. "I want to see what you look like." He let me uncover his face, a slight blush brushing across his cheeks. I smiled. "Much better." I whispered, and set back to work on his throbbing member. I started gently, merely teasing him. Matt stroked his long fingers through my hair, panting and groaning softly. I surprised him by sucking on the head of his erection strongly. His back arched and a soft, sweet sounding '_Oh_' left his lips. I hummed as I took him deeper into my mouth, then sped up my movements, making him writhe in pleasure.

"Mm- hah, god Mels! I think- Oh my god! I think I'm-" Matt's head fell back and his mouth dropped open, giving me the signal I needed to stop. He moaned in frustration and pouted at me.

"Relax, baby. I'll take care of you." I kissed him, shuddering as his fingers made their way along my torso. I leaned over him and reached into our drawer, pulling out our bottle of lube. I rubbed his balls with my open palm, smiling at the gasp that left him. I snapped the bottle open and coated three fingers, setting one at his entrance. I sucked softly on his member, distracting him as I touched my finger to him. "Ready?" I asked, looking up and finding fear in his eyes.

Matt's POV

His finger was just barely brushing my entrance, and yeah, it felt good, but I couldn't stop the flow of memories that flashed before my eyes. I let out a little whimper.

"Just do it, Melly." Mello smiled sadly and kissed across my hips as he slowly put a finger inside me. I tensed, and tightened around his finger, making him moan.

"Oh, Mail. You need to relax, love. If you're that tight when I go in, I'll come right away." That thought banished some of the bad ones from my mind and made me remember the throbbing I was feeling below the belt. I took some deep breaths and gave Mello permission to add another finger. He thrusted them gently and scissored me until I was stretched enough for three fingers, at which point Mello curved his fingers and found my prostate. White spots covered my vision and I went limp.

"_Ohh_…" I sighed. "Right there, Mihael." I rocked against his fingers as he drummed them against my sweet spot. His fingers left me, making me complain. I settled against the pillows as he lubed up his member and positioned himself at my entrance. He looked at me, his blue eyes soft and hazy with lust.

"Is this okay?" I held his face and brought him closer for a kiss, moving my hips closer to his. He held my hips and thrusted carefully into me, causing me to gasp. "Did I hurt you?" Mello asked worriedly. I shook my head, rocking my hips again.

"No. Just move." He smiled a lazy, sexy smile and held me close, pressing into my hot spot with each careful thrust. As we got into it, I became more desperate, pulling him closer and panting harshly. Mello spread my legs and pulled them over his shoulders, getting deeper and hitting my prostate firmly. I lost myself in the heat of the moment, in the sound of uneven breaths and moans of 'Oh, yes!' and 'Harder!' filling my ears. Mello wrapped his hand around my dick, stroking expertly. I felt myself tighten, getting closer. "Mel, I'm gonna-" Mello leaned down and kissed me tenderly, softening his movements.

"Come for me baby." He moaned, breathing heavily against my ear and neck. I moaned loudly, clinging to his shoulders and crying out his name as I came, that familiar hot coil letting go in my stomach. Mello gasped and rocked against me, riding out his own release. Then we lay there, Mello pulled out of me and I complained. He laughed and lay beside me, pulling me into his arms. We didn't even need to say anything. The soft kisses he laid on my shoulders and the gentle way I stroked his hair told us what we needed to know.

…

Later, I padded into the kitchen in my boxers, on a mission for Mountain Dew and chocolate. I found BB sitting on the counter, eating out of a jar of jam. I smiled shyly and opened my bottle, taking a sip. BB grinned crazily and patted the counter beside him. I crossed the kitchen, looking nervously over my shoulder.

"Hey," B said once I sat beside him. "I was thinking we could go for a drive tomorrow, you, me and Jamie. Just to get out of the city." I tapped my knee nervously.

"I dunno…"

"I won't leave you two alone, I promise. I'll take care of you, Matt. I like you." I rubbed my knee, looking at the ground.

"Well, I guess it'd be okay." I mumbled. Beyond got off the counter and, much to my surprise, gave me a quick peck on the cheek.

"Jamie really does love you, and he feels really bad for what he's done. I won't ask you to forgive him; that would be too much. All I ask is that you try to look past what he's done and see him for what he is now. He's trying." BB squeezed my knee and left the kitchen. As I walked by Jamie and BB, sprawled on the couch, I looked took a second to look at them. B was settled comfortably on Jamie's chest, snuggled up to him while Jamie stroked his hair and smiled absently, his eyes closed. I smiled despite myself and brought Mello his chocolate.

When I walked into our room, Mello was lying on my side of the bed, hugging my pillow. He was still awake and blinking slowly, smiling every now and then.

"Mel." I said, getting his attention. Mello perked up, sitting up in bed and holding out his hand for his chocolate. We sat together, consuming our addictions (Well, at least one of mine) until we ran out. I settled into Mello's side of the bed and opened my arms, waiting. Mello grinned and slipped between my arms, his back resting against my chest. I pulled him close and spooned him, bringing my lips close to his ear so I could sing.

_He was built with a brain  
>and some swagger.<em>

Mello laughed, recognizing the song.

_A little scream, little cry,  
>little laughter.<br>He's a ten,_

I poked his side, making him laugh again.

_I'm a joke in my own mind.  
>But He still loves to dance<br>with my punch lines, yeah._

Mello turned around in my arms, pulling his arms around my neck and playing with my hair.

_This love found us  
>now I see it.<br>This love: up, down.  
>Please believe.<em>

I kissed him lightly before I continued.

_Baby, when I'm yellin' at you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

He smiled and whispered,

"You don't yell at me." I held his face and continued, sticking out my tongue.

_Baby cause I'm crazy for you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

I rested my forehead against his and furrowed my eyebrows.

_Maybe I'm a little confused,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

Mello tangled his legs with mine and pulled himself closer, snuggling against me comfortably.

_And Baby, it's a wonderful news.  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

I snuck in a little kiss and kept singing,

_Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you to know.<em>

Mello made a noise of disagreement and let me keep going.

_I'm a fight with myself  
>till I'm bleeding.<br>Just a taste of your skin  
>starts the healing.<em>

I pressed a little kiss to Mello's nose.

_Anyone from my past  
>get your ammo.<em>

I made a gun with my hand and pretended to shoot the door. Mello raised his eyebrows._  
><em> 

_Find my sun in the dark side  
>of my shadow, yeah.<em>

He pulled away to look in my eyes, smiling slightly.

_This love found us  
>now I see it.<br>This love: up, down.  
>Please believe.<em>

I full out smiled, feeling strangely content.

_Baby, when I'm yellin' at you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

_Baby cause I'm crazy for you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

_Maybe I'm a little confused,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

_And Baby, it's a wonderful news.  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah_

Mello suddenly pulled me on top of him, spreading my legs so I was straddling him. The next line I sang came out shaky and breathy.

_Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you to know.<em>

He pulled me down for a sweet kiss that set my insides on fire. I kissed down his throat and finished the song, skipping some parts.

_Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you<br>Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you to know.<em>

When I woke up that morning, I felt light and warm and oddly… Happy. I had my best friend and the love of my life in my arms. I had another man who cared about me in my living room with my long lost brother, who was a little psychotic, but who isn't nowadays? It was the first time since the rape that I was feeling truly good. I was thinking maybe things were brightening up.


	24. Hotel Fun And Freedom!

**I'm BAAAACK!**

**Sorry for taking so long, guys. I really have no excuse. :(**

**To make up for it, there a crap load of lemon in the chapter! :P**

**Prepare yourselves.**

* * *

><p>"NO WAY IN HELL!"<p>

I was torn from a peaceful sleep by Mello screaming in the kitchen. I heard a murmured reply, then more of Mello yelling.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? NEVER! NOT OVER MY DEAD BODY!" I groaned in annoyance and stumbled out of bed, still half asleep. I fell into the wall while walking, making Mello poke his head out into the hallway. I smiled sleepily and rubbed my eyes.

"Well hey there, sexy." Mello stood with his arms crossed, glaring icily at me. "What's the matter, Angel?" I asked him, pulling him into my arms. He melted a bit, his glare disappearing slightly, then coming back full force. Mello pushed himself out of my arms.

"You agreed to leave the city with those two?" he asked in a fierce, accusing voice. "Alone? Just the three of you!" his voice raised a bit near the end of his sentence, and I shrunk against the wall. He wasn't yelling; Mello never yelled at me. Not when he was being serious at least. He yelled at me for little things like doing dishes or leaving socks on the floor. He yelled about things that were meaningless, things that I could smile about. He knew better to yell at me about serious things, or when we got in a fight.

"Well…" I mumbled, looking down. Mello stepped forward and gently lifted my face, looking into my eyes. I knew he could see the apology in them, the fear I had hidden from BB. He left a small kiss on the tip of my nose.

"Don't worry." He whispered to me, then turned on BB and Jamie in the kitchen and started yelling again. "NO! I'm coming with you guys!"

"You don't have to yell, we're right here." BB sighed. I followed Mello into the kitchen in time to watch Mello throw a glass across the room. It shattered against the wall, silencing Beyond.

"I'm coming. That's final." Mello stated, then stormed out of the room. I sighed and crossed the kitchen to get the broom.

"What have you two done? Now Mel's gonna be bitchy all day." I swept up the glass and went to get the vacuum, making sure no one would get cut walking around. Jamie and BB were in the same positions Mello left them in, and I vacuumed up all the glass, then ushered them out of the kitchen. "I'll go check on Mello." I told them once they sat on the couch. I knocked softly on our bedroom door before walking in, wringing my hands nervously. Mello looked up at me from where he was sitting on the floor, curled in on himself. He had one hand holding up his head and he looked tired.

"Come in, Matt. I'm not mad at you." I sighed in relief and closed the door behind me, walking over to Mello and sitting beside him. I rested my hand on Mello's thigh.

"I don't want you to be concerned about me all the time, Mels. It's not fair to you." Mello looked up at me, grinning slightly.

"Don't be silly Matt. I love you; I'll always worry about you. Especially when you get yourself in trouble like this." I flushed and looked down. Mello tilted my face up with one finger, looking into my eyes. "Jamie is dangerous, Matt. He's hurt you a lot lately, and I can't risk him doing it again. I won't."

"Beyond was going to be there-" Mello cut me off.

"Beyond is a little guy, and Jamie is strong. Sure I trust BB, but I don't trust Jamie. I'm coming with you guys."

"I just don't want them to get mad at you." I whispered, looking down and running my fingers over the carpet. Mello sighed and moved in front of me, pulling me into his lap.

"Listen, I don't give a shit if they get mad at me. B will understand, and I don't care about Jamie so his opinion doesn't matter. All that matters to me is you, Mail. I just want you to be safe, okay?" I finally met Mello's gaze and dropped my forehead to his, nuzzling our noses together.

"Okay." Mello pulled me close for a tight hug. "Same goes for you though. Don't do anything reckless." I mumbled into his ear. Mello made a noise of agreement and held me for a few moments, then stood up, pulling me with him.

"Let's get ready to go!" he said cheerily. I smiled.

Well this should be interesting.

Mello's POV

I had to admit, once everyone relaxed and started chatting, we had some fun. Matt and I sat in the back of Jamie's roofless car and Jamie and BB were in the front. Matt's shaggy hair was blowing around in the sweet breeze as he talked with Jamie about games. B and I talked about detective stuff and Wammy's. We drove for a really long time, stopping for gas three times, until we reached a hotel in the middle of nowhere.

"Where are we?" Matt asked after letting out a huge yawn and putting his arm around my shoulder in the back seat. I let him muss my hair and pull me against his chest.

"I have no idea." Replied BB. "Why don't we just stay at this hotel and go back home tomorrow?" Everyone agreed, and we got two rooms. One for each couple of course. Matt and I bid B and Jamie goodnight, then went over to our room. I hugged Matt from behind and snaked my hands into his pockets to fondle him as he was unlocking our door while I kissed his neck.

"I've always wanted to have kinky sex in a hotel room…" I murmured, biting his earlobe. I felt him harden at my ministrations, and he fumbled with the key, his hands shaking.

"Is that so…?" his voice was shaky and low.

"Yup."Matt chuckled huskily and gasped softly as I groped him.

"Alright, alright! I'm opening the door!" I shoved Matt into the room and slammed the door behind us. "I'm getting on the bed..." he narrated as he flopped onto the bed, sitting up. "I'm stripping..."he whispered as he pulled off his shirt, his scars barely noticeable in the dark room. Then he shimmied out of his jeans and leaned back on his elbows. He flicked his hair to the side and purred, "I'm waiting." I barely hesitated before tackling my sexy ginger lover.

It was a blur of teeth and tongues and wandering hands as Matt flipped us over and dominated our kiss, his hands travelling down to the laces of my leather pants. I groaned when he rubbed my member through the constraining fabric, smirking at me in the dark. He leaned down to bite my neck while he slid my pants down my legs, sucking on the wound and running his tongue over my pulse as an apology. He pulled off my shirt and grinned at me, making my heart pound. I panted softly as he moved lower, his lips closing over one of my nipples and sucking as his hand pawed at my erection.

"Nngh, Matt…" I sighed as he licked softly at my nipple, moving to bring attention to the other one. He held my erect length in his hand and stroked me with a loose fist, sending shivers down my spine. "Maaat! I want you!" I whined. He laughed sexily and stopped what he was doing, crawling over me on all fours.

"Call me by my real name, Mihael." He asked, leaning down to brush his mouth against my ear. His tongue flicked out to tease my earlobe, and then ran along the edge of my ear, making me gasp. He laughed softly in my ear, and his lips made their way carefully down my neck, stopping to place a gentle suck or a light nip at my skin every now and then. "What would you like, babe?" he wondered as he kissed and sucked a trail of fiery pleasure down my torso.

"I want- ah!" I cried out as he placed a light kiss at my navel. "I want you to suck me."

"Ah-ah-ah!" he scolded, running a finger down the inside of my thigh. "Beg me. I think you've forgotten who's in charge here." Oh, _god_ I loved it when he got like this. His words brought a new rush of blood to my cock, and I squeezed my eyes shut as I got harder.

"Ohh…" I breathed, giving in. "Please!" I moaned. "Please, Mail, please! I need it so bad! I want you so bad- AH!" I let out a loud cry as Matt took me into his mouth, humming on the way down. He bobbed his head, swirling his tongue around the tip of my member. "Holy fuck Mail!" Matt pulled away to smirk at me, and slipped three fingers into his mouth.

"Are you sure you want this?" he asked in a mocking voice, pulling his lubricated fingers from his mouth. I scowled up at him, still panting lightly.

"I'm pretty fucking sure." He shrugged and pressed his first finger inside me, pushing against my inner walls. "Mmm, Mail…" I sighed, becoming limp against the pillows. I gasped as he added a second finger and stretched me, curling his fingers to brush my prostate. "Ungh, right there, Mail." He chuckled and took my member into his mouth again, sucking on the head and teasing the slit with the tip of his tongue. "Holy shit!" I cried, squirming around. Matt slipped his third finger into me and scratched at my prostate gently, scissoring his fingers. I jumped at the sharp pleasure that ran through me, feeling my cock twitch in Matt's mouth. I bucked my hips against his fingers as he worked them in and out. "Nngh, no. I need you. Please! AH!" Matt pushed against my prostate with all three fingers, stroking them in different directions. "Oh my god, _please_!" I whimpered. Finally, Matt removed his fingers from my entrance. I sighed in relief, then groaned in protest as Matt climbed off the bed.

"I'm just getting lube, babe." He explained, digging through his bag. I watched as he dropped his boxers to the floor, revealing his rock-hard erection. He clicked the bottle of lube open and squirted some into his hand, spreading it onto his cock. "Mmm…" he moaned as he stroked himself a few times, his eyes falling shut. I felt a light flush creep onto my cheeks and my dick throbbed at the sight.

"Mail… Please…" I begged, letting my legs slide open.

"Alright, alright. I'm coming." He crawled onto the bed and held my hips, positioning at my entrance. I closed my eyes as the head on his member entered me, stretching my entrance a bit. Matt sighed and his head dropped down to my shoulder. His teeth found my neck and bit down softly, making me gasp as he jerked his hips and entered me to the hilt. Matt stayed still for a moment, letting me adjust. I could feel him panting against my shoulder. "God, Mihael. You're so fucking tight." His voice had that rough, sexy feel to it like it did whenever we had sex.

"O-okay. You can move now." I said softly, bringing my arms around his neck. Matt brought his head up from my shoulder and looked into my eyes. His goggles had come off somehow and I could see clearly into his beautiful green eyes. He left a chaste kiss on my lips as he pulled out almost all the way before sinking back in slowly, hitting my prostate gently. A low moan left my lips and Matt rained small kisses down my neck and along my chest as he picked up a slow and steady rhythm. He made love to me, so gently it was like he thought I was going to break. It was such a difference from his previous dominating mood, but I found that I liked this gentle love-making just as much as the rough kind. His breathing picked up and he gripped my hips, pulling me closer for deeper penetration. I sighed and pulled softly at his hair as he aimed for my prostate and pressed against it firmly with each thrust, trying to bring me to my climax before him. I could feel myself getting closer, tightening around Matt's throbbing cock. Small moans left my parted lips as I felt pleasure building in my lower stomach.

"Yes!" Matt panted. "Come for me, baby." He gripped my painfully hard erection and stroked softly, circling his thumb around my head.

"Oh, _GOD_! MAIL!" I shouted as my release took over my body. Our slow pace made the orgasm seem way more intense than usual, as wave after wave of pleasure took over my body. I was vaguely aware of Matt's soft moan as his own climax came, and the panted_ 'I love you'_ in my ear. We lay there for a moment, catching our breath. Matt pulled out of me carefully, and held my face as he kissed me.

"Mihael…" he whispered.

"Mm-hmm?" I watched a mischievous grin spread across his face.

"You've been a good boy lately, you know that?" my breath caught, and Matt laughed quietly, sending shivers down my spine.

"Why do I get the feeling you have more in store for me tonight?"

"Because I do." My heart rate went up as Matt crawled off of the bed and went to get his bag, coming back with a bunch of toys. He smiled as he showed me the vibrator he had used on me once. "I think you remember this." I moaned softly. "I'll take that as a yes." He showed me a pair of handcuffs, a cock ring and a small whip. "You said you wanted kinky." He reminded me. I nodded.

"But- You know, I don't think I can go again just yet." Matt smiled and sidled up beside me.

"But I can. That's why it's your turn…" Matt came up close so his lips were against my ear as he whispered,

"Master." I shuddered and grabbed him suddenly, pinning him under me.

"Oh, Mail. Were you curious after you made me come over and over again with your vibrator?" I asked, straddling his skinny hips. Matt swallowed and nodded carefully, knowing just how much I got into the dominatrix role. I stroked his cheek softly, comforting him. I didn't plan on hurting him. I bent down to suck on his neck and leave a nice hickey. "Would you like me to cuff you to the bed?" I asked, trailing my hand down to stroke him to full hardness.

"Mmn! Yes, please Master!" he moaned. I laughed darkly and searched for the key, setting it on the bedside table so it wouldn't get lost. I carefully cuffed Matt's wrists to the bedposts, restraining his hands. I could feel Matt's hot breath on my chest as I hovered over him, loving the feel of his warm body between my thighs.

"Mail, you're so god damn sexy." I told him, moving down to hold his face and kiss him softly. He moaned into the kiss, his tongue creeping out to find mine. We made out for a while, until I had to pull away for air. Matt was panting a bit, pulling at the cuffs and raising his hips.

"Please, Master! I want you to..." he trailed off, looking away from me as a light blush brushed across his cheeks. I stroked his hair, twisting a piece around my fingers.

"You want me to what?" I asked, biting down on his earlobe. He gasped.

"I want... I want you to own me." He whispered, not looking at me. I laughed softly, staying in character, and forced him to look at me.

"I already own you." I murmured, before moving down and taking Matt into my mouth.

"Fuck!" he shouted in surprise, a string of loud moans and other swear words following as I worked at his erection with my tongue. He always said I gave the best blowjobs. "Oh, god, MASTER!" I felt his cock twitch in my mouth, signalling his release, so I stopped my sucking and kissed up his thigh, laughing at his soft complaints.

"We still haven't used your toy." I reached over to grab the vibrator, poking his stomach gently with it.

"Mmm, I'm excited." he panted, his hands curled into fists above his head. I ran my tongue along the vein on the underside of his dick.

"I can see that." I said after he let out a long moan. I put lube onto my fingers and started stretching him, scissoring him and kissing his hips to make up for any discomfort. I made sure he was stretched as much as I could with my fingers before lubing up the vibrator and sliding it in.

"Mnh, it's cold..." he whispered, pressing his hips forward. "Please, Master! Deeper!" he begged. I shook my head and turned it on to the first setting, loving the way his head fell back in pleasure. "Ohh..." he sighed. I smiled and slipped the cock ring on. _This is going to be fun_.

"How do you like that, Mail?" he sent a desperate look at me.

"Please! I need it deeper!" I grinned and kissed the corner of his mouth, darting my tongue out to taste his lips.

"Please who?"

"Please, Master!" I smirked and pressed it deeper, knowing it hit the right spot when Matt cried out, jerking his hips forward. I turned it up two more settings, pushing it harder against his prostate. "_Holy fucking shit!_" Okay, I admit, this was way hotter than I anticipated.

"Getting close, babe?" I asked while stroking the underside of his dick.

"Nngh! YES!" he started rocking his hips slightly, whimpering softly. I chuckled and blew air onto Matt's throbbing dick, making him let out another whimper. "Oh god! Yes, _yes_! Master,_ please,_ take off the ring! I'm gonna come!"

"You did this to me, Mail. It's your turn." I turned it up another level and watched him writhe on the bed, begging and moaning as he tensed up.

"Ugh, Master! N-no! PLEASE! OH MY FUCKING GOD!" he threw his head back, panting and groaning so loudly I wondered if we would get in trouble. He rocked his hips, his thigh muscles tensing up as he orgasmed without spilling any of his seed. When it was over, he went limp and breathed, "Oh, Mihael." I laughed and leaned forward to kiss his exposed throat.

"Did you like it, baby?" Matt whimpered quietly and rocked his hips again, tying to push the vibrator deeper.

"Th-thank you Master... But... I need to come..." I kissed down his chest and sucked on one of his nipples, biting softly. Matt moaned plaintively.

"Just once more?" I whispered, moving my hand between his legs.

"Nngh! No! Please! AHH!" he nearly screamed when I turned it up all the way, pressing it against his prostate,_ hard. _He let out some harsh gasping noises as he dry orgasmed for a second time, not a single drop of cum leaving his body. I turned the vibrator down a few levels and moved it away from his sweet spot so he could calm down. I laughed as I pulled him into my arms, kissing his flushed face. "M-master... _Please_..." he whimpered desperately.

"Again?" I asked with a light laugh, ignoring my own straining erection.

"N-no! UGH!" I pressed the vibrator against his already sensitive prostate and watched a small orgasm rock him. "Mihael..." he murmured. He must be pretty desperate if he broke character.

"Alright, I'll take the ring off." I pulled out the vibrator and rolled the cock ring off of his painful-looking hard-on. "Aw, that looks like it hurts, babe." I commented while stroking around the base of his erection. Matt groaned and raised his hips slightly.

"Mmnh, it does." I cocked an eyebrow at him when he raised his head to look at me with soft eyes.

"Want me to take care of it?" He let out a shuddered sigh and nodded eagerly. I smiled at hm and re-lubed two fingers, pressing them into his stretched entrance.

"What are you doing, Miha- I mean- Master? I'm ready for you." he insisted. I shrugged and pulled my fingers out of his eager orfice, spreading lube onto my member instead. I hissed in pleasure at the coolness on my heated dick. I stroked myself a few times, then positioned myself at his entrance.

"Ready?" I asked, my voice uneven. Matt squirmed around, rolling his shoulders.

"Ready." he answered in a quiet voice. I leaned down to kiss him as I pushed in, catching his moan on my tongue as I kissed him. His tight heat wrapped around my engorged member, causing a stifled moan to leave my lips.

"M-mail... You feel so good..." I started up desperate thrusts, looking for his sweet spot. Matt gasped and bucked his hips forward as I went deeper and the head of my dick touched his prostate.

"Ungh, I'm not going to last long, Miha- Master." he warned me. I bent down to kiss his hot cheek.

"Call me Mihael. And that's okay, me neither." I grabbed his hips and pulled him down onto my cock, watching as I disappeared into his body. "Holy fuck..." I was close, I could feel it. "Nngh, I'm so close, Mail." I pulled his legs up over my shoulders so I could go deeper, hitting his sweet spot directly.

"Haah, Oh god... Right there!" He looked so sexy... So uninhibited and completely at my mercy. I fucking loved it. He let out a soft, but long and low moan as he tightened like a vice around my throbbing organ.

"Ungh! Oh my god, Mail! You feel so _good_!" I managed one more thrust into his prostate before he lost it.

"Oh, Mihael... God, _YES!_ I'm coming!" he shouted, pulling desperately at his restraints as he came, _HARD. _I've never seen him come so hard before. His spasming entrance pulled my orgasm from me, forcing a loud cry of pleasure and a gasped _'Mail!' _from my mouth.

Afterwards, I lay with our stomachs touching, barely aware of Matt's seed between our skin. I held myself up on a shaking arm, with the intent to _not_ crush Matt. I stayed inside of him until the pleasure subsided, breathing in his scent and leaving small kisses on his chest and shoulders. Once I had completely calmed down, I shifted my hips and grudgingly pulled out of his body. I reached over to unlock Matt's handcuffs, watching him stretch his shoulders and rub his wrists. Once he made himself comfortable, he offered me his body to sleep on; an invitation I eagerly took. He stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head, whispering,

"I think that was the best orgasm I've had in my life so far. That was incredible, Mihael." I sighed happily and hugged Matt closer.

"I can agree with you. I love you so much. I don't know what I'd do without you." Matt chuckled and ruffled my hair affectionately.

"You'd probably be fucking chicks." I shuddered in disgust.

"Don't even say that, you'll scar me for life!" He lifted my face so he could place a soft apology kiss on my lips.

"Sorry. I love you, Angel." I kissed him back briefly before cuddling against him.

"Let's sleep." I suggested.

"I'm down with that." He hummed a little lullaby for me, and I fell asleep in his warm, protective arms.

The next day, Matt's POV

_BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!_

"Rise and shine, M&M!" BB practically broke the door down with the force of his knocking.

"SLEEPING, MOTHER FUCKER!" Mello screamed, shoving a pillow over his head and squeezing up close to me. I half sat up, feeling dizzy and groggy.

"C'mon! We have to get going guys!" BB whined, making Mello sigh impatiently. I rubbed one of my eyes and scratched my head.

"Mmnh, I don't think there's any use in arguing, Mels. Let's just get up." I slipped out of bed and braced myself against the dresser as a major case of jelly-legs nearly knocked me over. "God, Mello. That sex last night really took its toll on me." I _still_ felt over-sensitive. Mello laughed darkly, causing me to look over at him.

"I have a test for you, Matt." I raised my eyebrows.

"Uh-huh?" Mello made the '_come hither_" motion with his index finger, and I crawled across the mattress, placing a soft kiss on his mouth. Mello pulled me down and straddled me, pinning my arms under my head. Without warning, Mello pushed the vibrator we had been using into my stretched entrance, just barely hitting my prostate.

"M-Mello?" He smirked at me, leaning down to bite my earlobe.

"Does this thing have a remote?" he asked, gently pushing it in further so it brushed my prostate. I let out a soft moan.

"Nngh, y-yeah. In my bag." Mello kissed me gently, pulling away with a sadistic smile to dig around in my over-night bag. he let out a small 'aha!' when he found it, and he pressed a button, testing it. I jumped and moaned as gentle vibrations started against my sweet spot. They stopped when I got hard and I cast a desperate look at Mello. "Mel, what do you plan on doing?" Mello just smiled and got off of the bed, rummaging around the floor. I sat up and reached toward my entrance, wanting to take the toy out.

"Hey! Did I say you could take that out?" he complained.

"Um, no..." Mello smiled and pushed me down again, sliding my boxers on. I sighed. "But Mel... I'm hard..." Mello merely smiled and leaned down to bite at my hips, pulling my jeans on. "Please, Mello! This isn't fai- UNGH!" I was shocked by sudden pleasure as Mello turned the vibrator all the way up. "Ahhh, Mello!" My hips thrusted up on their own accord. Mello chuckled and did up my baggy jeans, hiding my erection. "I'm gonna... Mmmm, Mello!" Just as I was about to come, Mello turned off the vibrator and pulled me onto my feet.

"You'll have to relax if you're gonna be around Jamie and B with that in you." he said softly, tonguing my ear. I leaned heavily against him.

"I- I can't stand, Mels. My legs are too shaky." he sat me on the bed, making me groan as the vibrator pressed against my prostate. He smiled, holding my face as he kissed me, his lips teasing mine. Finally, he pulled away to let me breathe, pulling my striped shirt over my head.

"There we go." he said, a faint blush across his cheeks. He grinned and turned away, dressing himself. He slung my arm around his shoulders and dragged me to the car with our stuff, getting weird looks from B and Jamie. "He's a bit sleepy." Mello explained, helping me into the car. I bit my lip as I sat. Mello joined me with a cheshire cat smile. As we drove, I got used to the feeling of the vibrator inside me. Soon enough, I couldn't even tell it was in me. My hard-on finally left me alone, and I leaned against Mello in the back seat, smiling in content. "How are you holding up, babe?" Mello asked, running a hand through my hair.

"Fine." I answered honestly, nuzzling against his warm neck. I saw Mello reach into his pocket. "What are you-" I was cut off as a jolt ran through my body. Mello had turned on the vibrator again. I gasped, then put a hand over my mouth. Mello laughed, petting my hair. Beyond sighed and threw his arms behind his head.

"So, where do we go for lunch?" he asked no one in particular. "Hey Matt," he said suddenly, turning around to look at me. "What are you in the mood for?" _Oh god. Beyond has the worst timing ever. Let's see, what am I in the mood for? Mello's lips? Or his ass? Or his cock? Mmm..._

"H-how 'bout chinese?" I suggested, biting my tongue as Mello turned up the vibrator.

"Yeah, I'm down for that. I've been craving noodles." _Me too, B... Me too. _

"There's a restaurant just off this exit." Jamie said, flicking his turn signal on. Beyond turned his attention back to Jamie, molesting him and biting at his ear. Jamie swatted him away. I sighed in relief, then tensed again as Mello turned up the vibrations another level. I pulled Mello close so I could whisper in his ear.

"Hnngh, please Mel. I'm gonna come soon." Mello just chuckled and leaned down so he could whisper to me.

"Up another level then?" he offered. I groaned quietly and shook my head. He just grinned and reached into his pocket.

"No!" I whisper-yelled, then bit my lip as Mello skipped a few levels, turning it up all the way. I brought my hand to my mouth and bit the sleeve of my shirt to keep quiet. My hips bucked forward, and Mello solved that problem by lying across the backseat, pulling me between his legs. He wrapped his arms around my waist, keeping my hips in one place. I tilted my head back and rested it on his shoulder, breathing a gentle moan as a huge orgasm took over my body. "Ah..." I whispered, feeling my thighs twitch with the force of my release. Mello turned off the toy and whispered in my ear,

"Fuck, you're so hot, Matt. You can take it out when we get to the restaurant, okay?" I took long, deep breaths, calming down.

"Mmm... Okay, Melly." Mello smiled, looking satisfied, and hugged me to him, kissing my neck as I tried to catch my breath.

I ran to the bathroom as soon as we got into the restaurant, bringing my bag with me. I slipped the vibrator out of myself and sighed in relief, cleaning myself and then meeting the others in the restaurant. Mello was standing behind Jamie with his arms crossed, tapping one foot on the floor impatiently. When he saw me, he grinned evilly and licked his lips. I blushed bright red and dipped my head, hiding my goggled eyes with my hair.

"Hey baby." Mello greeted me, knowing exactly what effect it had on me when he called me baby. I pouted and bounced forward for a kiss, grabbing his pinkie with mine. Mello just smiled, swinging our hands. Jamie and BB brought a whole bunch of food over to us and we helped carry it into the car, where we sat and ate together, making gay jokes (We were eating noodles :P) and seeing who could fit the most food in his mouth.

Surprisingly enough, _I_ won that contest.

We drove into the night again, and Mello took a nap on my shoulder. I gently shook him awake when we got to our building, and I piggy-backed him to our apartment. B unlocked the door while I stood by with Mello slung on my back. I bid my brother and his lover goodnight and carried my angel to our room. I set him on the bed and he watched me with sleepy eyes as I unlaced his boots and slid them off his feet. I smiled at him as I undid his pants and tugged them off, shimmying up the bed to undo his vest and slide it off his torso. Mello kissed me, then rolled over and pulled the blankets over him as I pulled off my jeans and my shirt, sliding into bed behind him. He liked to sleep naked, whereas I had some modesty left and kept my boxers on. I wrapped my arms around his waist and nuzzled against the back of his neck.

"Mm... Matt?" he mumbled sleepily. I chuckled quietly.

"Yes, sweetheart?" I heard Mello laugh at the nick name.

"I love you." I kissed the back of his neck.

"Love you too. Now go to sleep." He sighed in content and followed my order, snuggling against me and promptly falling asleep.

He squirmed around a bit in his sleep until he was facing me, resting his head on my chest. I played with his hair and rested my lips on his head, thinking.

_It's been twelve years since I've known him, and about seven years since I've loved him... I think I should do it._

_Soon..._

One week later, Mello's POV

Jamie and BB were_ FINALLY_ out of our apartment! FREEDOM! Hey, as much as I had grown to like them, it got crowded. I missed being alone with Matt all the time. And so in celebration, I dragged Matt into our bedroom and pushed him onto the bed.

"Getting frisky, huh Mels?" Matt laughed, pulling off his shirt. I straddled him and bent down to kiss the scars on his stomach, dipping my tongue into his bellybutton. He gasped softly, pulling at my hair.

"Mm-hmm." I groaned, running my tongue down his navel. I paused with my mouth above his crotch. "I want to fuck you into tomorrow, Mail Jeevas." I growled, bringing my hands onto his hips. Matt shivered and whimpered, his hands finding mine.

"Oh, please do Mihael." He gripped my hands before I shook them off, leaving soft kisses on his hip. I pulled down his jeans and his boxers, licking his erection teasingly. "Nngh, Mihael! Don't tease!" He begged, raising his hips. I smirked and flipped him over, pulling at his hips so he was on all fours. After I pulled off the clothing in the way of my nether-regions, I bent over him, teasing his nipples by brushing my hands up his chest. He tensed with what I assumed to be arousal. I ground my hips against his ass, sighing at the much-needed friction. Matt whimpered under me.

"I want you so bad, Mail." I whispered into his ear, biting his earlobe softly. I could feel Matt's heart speed up.

"Please," his voice was shaky and frightened when he spoke. "Please stop." Taken aback, I raised myself off of him, rocking back on my knees.

"Wha- Mail? Are you okay?" I noticed him trembling beneath my hands, saw him bow his head and curl in on himself slightly. "Mail, baby, what's wrong?" I removed my hands from his hips and moved to sit beside him.

"_Please_, Jamie, don't do it again. It hurts too much..." My stomach lurched. I put my hands on his shoulders and moved him so he could look at me.

"Baby, it's me. It's okay." I whispered, touching his cheek. A few tears had left his eyes, wetting my fingertips. My arousal was forgotten, lust taken over by my protective side. "Mail, I'm sorry." Matt's green eyes lifted to meet mine, recognition flickering in them. New tears sprung to his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... It's just, when he..." Matt squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, breathing shakily. "That's the position he was in the first time he did it..." he mumbled, looking down. I took his hands in mine, bringing them up to my mouth so I could kiss his knuckles.

"I'm so sorry, Matty. I didn't mean to drag up memories." Matt opened his eyes and smiled unsteadily.

"It's not your fault, babe." he moved his hands into my hair, bringing my face closer. He rested his forehead against mine, breathing slowly. I moved closer so I was straddling his hips, making us the same height. Matt's arms came around my waist, holding me against his body. "I _hated_ it, Mel. The way he couldn't even look at me while he did it. It made me sick." He flexed his arms, holding me tighter. "He wasn't supposed to do that. Only you can touch me like that. It hurt when he did it... You make me feel good." He nuzzled against my neck, his breathing speeding up. "I love you, Mihael." He whispered, sending small shudders down my spine.

"I love you too, Mail." My hands twisted in his hair as he pulled back to look into my eyes.

"I want to kiss you." he said softly. I nudged closer and replied,

"So kiss me." Matt's mouth met mine softly as first, our lips just barely parted. He tugged my bottom lip between his own without using his teeth and sucked softly on it, then captured my lips again. He kissed the corner of my mouth, then went back to my lips, brushing his against mine softly. I shivered at the wave of sensation it brought. I think I had mentioned before that I loved kissing. His hands came up to hold my face, making me swoon as he pressed his lips to mine. His tongue prodded my lip while he wound his hands into my hair, asking for entrance. My hands dropped to his shoulders and I opened my mouth, letting his tongue slide in, brushing the roof of my mouth and causing me to moan softly. Matt pulled me closer and started a tongue-battle with me, which he ended up winning. After pinning my tongue down, he allowed his warm appendage to explore my mouth, touching all the sensitive spots. I was getting desperate. He pulled away for a moment, licking at the corner of my mouth. I caught my breath, feeling woozy. Matt was an extremely talented kisser. When his lips met mine again, it was rougher, our teeth clicking together and tongues wrapping around each other. Matt tasted wonderful, like cinnamon and cigarettes. Matt bit my tongue gently, then nipped my bottom lip, his hands wandering down my waist. I shivered as his hands ghosted over my hips, pulling me closer to his pelvis. I could feel his erection coming back against my thigh, and I gasped for breath, pulling my mouth away from his.

"I want you." he murmured, his voice husky and _so fucking sexy_!

"Mmm, god, Mail." I panted, pushing him back. I was suddenly on top of him, with my hands on either side of his head. Matt's eyes were bright, his cheeks flushed slightly, his bare chest rising and falling rapidly, his hair splayed around his head gorgeously. "You're so beautiful." I whispered. He pulled my head down for another kiss, pressing his mouth to mine desperately. Matt pushed against my chest, rolling us over so he was on top. He smiled adorably at me and turned around so we were in the 69 position. I felt him leave soft kisses on my lower stomach.

"I know we've never done this before, but I wanted to try it out; if that's okay." I answered by pulling his hips down and taking his throbbing member into my mouth. Matt made a noise of surprise and pleasure and bent down to finish what he started. After a while of pure ecstasy, I could feel myself getting close, so I started sucking harder on Matt, determined to get him to finish before me. Matt groaned around my length, sending lovely vibrations all around my penis. My hips bucked up accidentally, and I stroked his thigh as an apology. Matt paused his ministrations, causing me to whimper softly. Soon enough, though, he went back to working my heated erection. I jumped as I felt his finger circle my entrance, asking permission. I pulled away from Matt's member and said,

"Go ahead." As consent. Matt's slick finger slipped inside me, and I moaned, returning to Matt's problem between his legs. I felt him prod at my prostate, tearing a desperate moan from my occupied mouth. Matt groaned in approval around my dick and pushed harder against my prostate. The double stimulation was too much for me, and I gripped Matt's thighs as I came,_ hard_, into his mouth. Matt swallowed all I had to offer and pulled his hips away from me. I groaned in disapproval. "I'm not done with you yet." I complained as he returned to a face-to-face position. He kissed me, letting me taste my own seed on his tongue. I always found that very erotic.

"I want to come inside of you." he panted, kissing down my throat. I moaned softly as I grew hard again and nodded, spreading my legs. Matt brought his fingers into his mouth, coating them in saliva. He pushed two fingers in at the same time, brushing my prostate. I surprised both of us by coming immediately.

"S-sorry." I managed, breathing heavily. "I'm still sensitive." Matt laughed and started licking my semen off of my stomach.

"No worries, baby. That should make this even better." I let him stroke me back to full hardness, which didn't take very long. He brought his fingers back to my entrance and resumed preparing me, avoiding my prostate. Soon, I was bucking my hips and whimpering.

"I want you inside now." I pleaded. I felt Matt's breathing quicken and he grabbed my hips, positioning himself.

"Ready?"

"Yes!" Matt bit his lip as he entered me, tilting his head back and letting out a tiny moan.

"God, Mihael. You feel so good." I was in heaven. Matt's vibrant red hair, his loving green eyes, his long, lean body, his soft mouth running down my neck, his hard length buried in my body, his gentle hands tracing patterns on my skin, oh _god_, all of him was just so undeniably sexy that I felt close to climax and we had barely started.

"P-please,_ move_!" My voice came out higher than I intended, and Matt buried his head against my shoulder, softly thrusting forward. I tensed on purpose to make it more enjoyable for him, and he groaned against my neck, gripping my hips.

"Mnnh, fuck. You're so tight. I'm not hurting you, am I?" I shook my head, thrusting my hips so I was impaled further.

"No. Just- Uhn!" I groaned as Matt gave a particularly hard thrust, pushing deeper than ever before. "Oh my mother fucking god! You've never been that deep befo- OH!" Matt snapped his hips forward, pressing against my sweet spot effectively. "Nngh, oh my god, _Mail_!" I cried out his name as he started up fast, hard thrusts, hitting my prostate every time. I stopped thinking, hearing, I couldn't even register anything I was seeing as my body was taken over by white-hot pleasure. I vaguely remember hearing Matt gasp my name and feeling something hot inside me, but that was lost too as a tidal wave of pleasure washed over me. I was probably screaming, probably thrashing, maybe even writhing with pleasure but I didn't care. When I got a hold of my senses, Matt was beside me on his side, smiling a little smile at me. I was still panting, and I reached out for him, pleased when he pulled me into his arms.

"Did you enjoy that?" he asked, his lips at my ear.

"Mmm-hmm..." I mumbled, feeling exhausted.

"Hey... Mihael?" Matt whispered, his voice shaky. The tone he was using caught my attention, wiped all the sleepiness out of me.

"What's wrong?" I demanded, holding his face.

"N-nothing. I just-" He bit his lip shyly, then made a determined face and slipped out of bed.

"Mail?" I sat up, confused. Matt held up his hands, smiling reassuringly.

"Just a second." I watched him rummage around his dresser, pulling on a pair of boxers and swearing lightly while he looked for something, making me smile. I settled back into bed, watching my lover stumble over to me, shaking with nerves. "Okay." he said, sitting next to me. He was hiding something behind his back with one hand.

"Okay?" I prompted. Matt smiled and leaned forward to kiss me.

"Sorry if I stutter, I'm kind of nervous." I held his free hand and smiled.

"It's okay. Go on." Matt kissed my hand, and placed it in my lap, fiddling with the blanket.

"Mihael," he started, taking a deep, shaky breath. "I've known you for twelve years, and we've been in love since we were kids." he grinned sweetly at me, making my heart stop. "You protect me, and make me strong when I'm weak. You're my angel, my love, my Mihael." He smiled proudly and reached out to touch my face for a moment. "You've stuck by me for so long. You're so gorgeous, I love you so much. And so..." I watched with a fast-beating heart as Matt sunk onto the floor. I moved to the edge of the bed, tears pricking at my eyes as Matt got onto one knee. "Mihael Aaron Keehl..." I brought a hand to my mouth, stifling my sobs. He brought a little black box from behind his back and opened it, showing me a simple, elegant wedding band. "Will you do me the honor of becoming my husband?"

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><p><strong>Sorry for the cliffhanger, hopefully I'll be able to update faster for the next one!<strong>

**LOVE YOU GUYS!**


	25. I do

**Alright, so this starts off really creepy, but it gets fluffy, don't worry ^-^ His dream is based off of one I had once. O.o**

**I don't know who to credit for first song used, and I changed some of the lyrics, sorry. -_-'**

**The second song is Lullaby by Sia and it's beautiful! I couldn't resist using it! (I DON'T OWN IT! T-T)**

**For the song Play by Krooked K, watch this video (I don't own the song or the video!). watch?v=81D2PgD2ioY**

**ENJOY!**

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><p>Matt was leaning against a wall, casually brushing his hands on his jeans. A group of men and women approached him, greeting him like they were old friends. I watched with terror as they threw him down on the concrete floor and started tearing off his clothes.<p>

They had their way with him, one by one, and all he did was lay there and giggle. He was very quiet, just little bubbles of laughter leaving his lips every now and then. I screamed at him, at them, trying to get them to stop so he could get away.

One of them pulled out a knife and grabbed his hair, tearing out pieces. He merely started laughing more, giggling continuously. The man smiled and ran the knife down his stomach, tearing open skin and causing him to bleed.

He started laughing, the force of his muscles casing him to bleed more. My stomach churned as the group swooped down at him, ripping at his skin with their teeth and fingernails, opening him up and feasting upon his flesh. All the while, Matt just started laughing harder, until the group cracked his ribs open, tearing at his insides. They clawed at his back, his hips and his thighs, leaving deep scratches on his skin. He was laughing manically, hysterically, uncontrollably. I was screaming at the top of my lungs.

"MATT!_ MATT!_" He just kept laughing, even harder. One of the women looked up at me, smiling around Matt's flesh in her mouth, his blood dribbling down her chin. She slowly brought her finger to her lips and grinned while she said,

"Shh."

"GAH!" I sat bolt upright in bed, holding my chest and panting. I shook my head a few times, trying to get rid of the images burned in my brain. I felt Matt roll over beside me and heard him groan while pushing himself up to look at me.

"Mel? What's wrong?" He was half-asleep, his eyes fluttering shut and then being forced open again by his faltering will-power to stay awake. He was wearing a huge, baggy striped shirt and faded Link boxers. His hair was all spiky and messy from sleep.

"J-just a nightmare." I explained, catching my breath. Matt's eyes went all soft and lovey, and he rubbed my back softly, comforting me. I didn't usually have nightmares, that was more Matt's thing. "I... Can you do me a favour?" Matt laid his head on my lap.

"Mmkay..." he mumbled.

"Can you take off your shirt?" Matt sat up, looking confused.

"Okay?" he pulled his shirt off and sat there, letting me look him over. There was no torn-open stomach, no blood and guts. It was just Matt's soft chest, his long, lean stomach, his thin, boyish hips and the ever-present scars across his body. I ran my hand down the middle of his chest, stopping above his boxers, making him shiver. "Mmm. Mel, you said no sex before the wedding, remember?" We hadn't even touched each other sexually since the night of the proposal a week ago. My heart jumped at the word '_wedding'._ In three days, Matt and I were getting married. Matt and Mello. Mail and Mihael. Married! I couldn't get over it! After he proposed to me, I tackled him with a hug and whispered a breathless 'yes' between kisses. That of course led to many rounds of passionate love-making.

I smiled at my sleepy fiancé, curling my hand around his waist to pull him down beside me again. Matt nuzzled his head against the side of my chest that had my scar, listening to my heart. His thin arms came around my waist, his lips touching my ribs.

"What was your dream about?" he asked, moving so our legs were touching. I petted his hair like he was a dog, kissing the top of his head.

"I dreamt that people were eating you." Matt laughed gently.

"You eat me all the time." I blushed.

"Not like that. Actually eating you. Your organs and stuff. And you were... Laughing. Like a maniac." Matt shifted so he could pull me against his body, resting my head on his chest. He let his hands drift from the top of my head to between my shoulder blades slowly and softly, making me melt against him.

"Don't worry, sweetheart. No one's going to eat anybody." I laughed.

"I know. It was just scary." I felt Matt press his cheek to the top of my head.

"Would you like me to sing to you?" I smiled.

"If that's okay." Matt breathed a laugh and held me closer.

"I only know a few verses."

"That's okay." I heard and felt him take a deep breath, and then in his soft, low, gravelly voice, he started to sing,

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

You make me happy when skies are grey.

You'll never know, dear. How much I love you.

Please don't take my sunshine away.

The other night, dear, while I was sleeping.

I dreamt I held you in my arms.

When I awoke, dear, I was mistaken.

So I held my head and I cried.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

You make me happy when skies are grey.

You'll never know, dear. How much I love you.

Please don't take my sunshine away.

I'll always love you, and make you happy.

If you will only say the same.

If this is true, dear, then I will promise.

Happy days will come your way.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

You make me happy when skies are grey.

You'll never know, dear. How much I love you.

Please don't take my sunshine away.

You told me once, dear  
>You really loved me<br>And no one else could come between.

And now I find, dear, you dance forever.

So I'll see you in my dreams.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

You make me happy when skies are grey.

You'll never know, dear. How much I love you.

Please don't take my sunshine away."

His singing faded into humming, and he stroked my hair comfortingly. I felt tears of joy stinging my eyes.

"C-can you sing it again, baby?" I asked in a whisper, moving closer. Matt held my face and moved so he could look at me. He cupped my face in his long, careful hands and looked into my eyes as he sang it again.

I swear, I loved that man _so_ much.

Two days passed fairly quickly, and I soon found myself sitting on the couch with Matt spread out on the floor in front of me, surrounded by papers.

"So, everyone who's coming has RSVP'd already, so we have a grand total of... Eight guests." I laughed.

"Whoa, I dunno babe. That's a lot of people!" Matt reached behind him and smacked my leg gently.

"Shush. We only have so many 'cause you're Mr. Popular at work!"

"What are you talking about! I have_ two_ friends!" I went onto the floor and straddled Matt, rubbing his shoulders.

"I only have one." He reminded me.

"You work from home most of the time." I retorted. "And why the _hell_ does Near have to come?"

"He's from our childhood Mel, and besides, he seemed happy to come."

"What are you talking about!" I exclaimed for the second time that night. "He has no emotions!" Matt flipped over underneath me and smiled up at me.

"That's because you took them from him." I rolled my eyes at Matt, and then leaned forward so my hands were on either side of his head and I was closer to him.

"Only so I could love you like I do." I whispered, nuzzling my nose against his. He grinned crookedly, making butterflies start in my stomach. "You're so cute." He propped himself up on his elbows and caught my mouth in a kiss, resting his hands on my forearms. I shivered and leaned forward for more, only to have him pull back.

"Soon, babe. Don't worry." I groaned in frustration and leaned my head against his shoulder.

"It's been nine days! Please!" I felt him laugh and push my shoulders up.

"You'll live." He slid out from under me, walking towards the bathroom. "Just go over everything once more, mkay?" I rolled my eyes.

"Sure, sure." I was bored within five minutes, so I walked to our bedroom, meaning to take a nap. Walking to our bedroom involves passing the bathroom, and I wasn't expecting what I heard. Matt's soft voice filtered through the bathroom door.

"Mmm, ah! Oh, Mel... Right there... Uhhn, yes, faster!" I opened the door without warning and found Matt leaning against the bathtub with his cock in his hand. I leaned against the doorway, smiling.

"Are you masturbating?" I asked, loving the blush covering his face.

"No," he said sarcastically. "I just thought I'd pull my penis out and admire it." He rolled his eyes and went back to what he was doing, tilting his head back, closing his eyes and moaning, moving his hand up and down his dick. "Oh, hell." He panted. I crossed my legs and tried not to get turned on, failing miserably. Matt opened his eyes just enough to give me a peek of beautiful green eyes and grinned. "I know you get off on this, Mihael." I shivered and clasped my hands over my crotch, trying to hide my hard-on. He smiled wider. "Don't- Mmn- Pretend." His breathing hitched and he spread his legs wider, moving his hand faster. "Ohh, I'm gonna come. Are you ready?" I nodded before I could stop myself. Matt raised his hips and lurched forward, crying out as his orgasm took over him. His cum spilt onto his hand and a bit on the floor, and he gave himself a few strokes afterward just to cool down. He leaned against the tub, sighing contently.

"Y-you better clean that sh-shit up." I stuttered. Matt laughed and tucked himself back into his boxers and jeans, heaving himself off the floor with difficulty. His legs were always shaky after orgasm. He grabbed a tissue and cleaned everything up. He came to stand in front of me, leaning down so his lips were in front of mine.

"Do I get a show now?" he asked. I whimpered and pulled him into the bedroom. And yes, I gave him a show.

The next day, Matt's POV

"Wakey, wakey sexy baby!" I jumped on top of Mello, practically vibrating with excitement. He groaned and pulled a pillow over his head, rolling over.

"Ten more minutes..." he mumbled. I bounced off the bed.

"No! The chapel opens soon! We have to _hurry_!" I went to our closet and pulled out my red suit jacket, pulling it on over my black dress shirt. "I need you to tie my tie." I poked Mello through the blankets, looping my white tie around my neck. Mello tugged the pillow off his face and reached up to my neck. He paused, his eyes widening. He sat up slowly, blinking as he looked me up and down.

"Holy shit, Matt. You look sexy!" He whispered, biting his lip. I grinned.

"Tie my tie, and then get ready!" Mello tied my tie quickly, then got out of bed and went to take a quick shower. He pulled on a red dress shirt and tied a white tie around his neck, letting it hang loose. He pulled on a black suit jacket over it all and undid two buttons at the top of his dress shirt. Before we left, he pulled me down for a quick kiss and slapped my ass.

"Let's go." He said, grinning. I followed him to the parking lot downstairs and we got into my car. He kept his hand on my thigh the entire drive there. Mello let his hair dry in the wind, and when we arrived at the chapel, his hair looked all windswept and sexy. We weren't too big on formal attire, so he was, of course, wearing his leather pants. I had on a pair of dark skinny jeans that made my legs look ridiculously long. We walked into the chapel hand-in-hand, smiling like idiots.

We had invited Near, B and Jamie, our lesbian neighbours, two of Mello's friends from work and one of my friends from work. When we got there, we were just waiting on Mello's friends and Near. Everyone stood around and while we waited and talked to each other. Near came in, shuffling around awkwardly as I introduced him to everyone. He blushed more than I do when I greeted him with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Mello glared at him jealously, but shook his hand nonetheless. Mello's friends came last, apologising like crazy. And then the ceremony started. My friend Nikolai was doing all the priest stuff.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today before these friends and family, to join together this man" he gestured to me. "And this man" he gestured to Mello. "In Matrimony. This is an honorable and beautiful estate, and therefore is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but instead with love, respect, friendship, and honor." I smiled at Mello and he grinned back at me. "Could you two please hold hands?" We turned to face each other and held each other's hands, smiling and blushing. "Would you like to say your vows?"

"I'll go first." I offered, reaching into my pocket to get Mello's ring. I hovered it over his finger and began, "Mihael, as I stand here before you, I can see in your eyes all the things I love about you. As I stand here, with this ring in my hand, it makes me remember how you complete me. It makes me remember every laugh we've ever shared, every hard time we have been through together, and every beautiful moment there is to come. Mihael, I give you this ring, my heart, and my soul. I give you everything I am today as I stand before you. I promise to love you, protect you, be with you forever, and cherish every moment as if it were the last moment on earth. Mihael, I love you. With this ring, let it be known, that over every other person in the world I could be with, I chose you. Let it be known, that with this ring, I'm promising to be here for you for all eternity, 'til death do us part." Mello wiped tears away with one hand and laughed gently as I put the ring on his finger. We both looked over at Nikolai, who was smiling at us.

"And you?" he prompted. Mello laughed again, and reached into the pocket of his suit jacket for my ring, which he held in front of us. Every single, tiny bit of my attention was on him as he started speaking.

"Mail, since we have been together, you have made me feel more complete, more alive, and have shown me the true meaning of happiness. I am a better person with you by my side. That's why today, in front of you, our friends, and our family, I take you to be my partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. Mail, I promise to respect you as an equal and to recognize that your interest, desires and needs are as important as mine." I snorted quietly, which made Mello laugh. "I promise to laugh with you when times are good, and be there for you however you need me when they are bad. I can't wait to grow old together," he had to pause to control his tears. "-getting to know the man you will become, and falling in love a little more every day." Mello took a few deep breaths, biting his lip. "Today I give you my hand, my heart, and my love without condition, completely and forever, 'til death do us part." I laughed through my tears as he put the ring on my finger, holding my hands tightly.

"D-do you, Mail Jeevas, take Mihael Keehl to be your husband?." Nikolai was also crying, though he was trying not to let it show.

"I do." I whispered, my voice cracking. Mello beamed at me.

"And do you, Mihael Keehl, take Mail Jeevas to be your husband?"

"I fucking do!" he nearly shouted. Everyone laughed.

"Ladies and gentlemen, it is with great pride and pleasure that I pronounce these two Husband and Husband. You may now kiss the groom." We weren't sure which one of us he was talking to, but it didn't matter. Mello threw his arms around my neck and kissed me in earnest, laughing and crying at the same time. Everyone in the room cheered and clapped while we pulled away, laughing happily. We got rice, little pieces of chocolate and cigarettes thrown at us as we walked out of the chapel. Mello caught as much chocolate as he could in his mouth and I picked up a handful of cigarettes as we got in my car. I kissed him, long and slow before I started the car, which made everyone cheer again.

Now it was time for the party.

Mello's POV

We had rented out a hall for the after-party to take place in, and when we showed up everyone was already there. We might have been a bit late because Matt pulled over all of the sudden and started making out with me. I might have gotten a little too into the session and climbed onto his lap. We may or may not have suffered from heart attacks as my back pressed against the horn. Then we might have noticed the time and rushed to get here on time.

The hall looked great, with white Christmas lights all over the place and candles scattered around to set a romantic mood. The Dubstep playing in the background kind of shattered that, but it filled my body with excitement, and I wanted to dance!

Everyone except for Near was dancing already, laughing and having a good time. Jamie was dancing with one of the lesbians, B was dancing with Matt's friend from work, one of my friends was dancing with the other lesbian, and his wife (who was my other friend from work) was talking to Near, trying to get him to dance. Matt laughed adorably and went to help get Near on the dance floor, and I went off to B and Matt's friend, joining their dancing. After a while, there was the sound of someone tapping a microphone, and the music stopped. Everyone looked toward the stage where Jamie was standing, holding a microphone.

"Hey guys, and girls. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Matt's brother Jamie. Over there's my boyfriend- Hey! I see you hitting on him, Mello!" B and I laughed, and I slung my arm around his shoulders, wiggling my tongue. Matt catcalled from across the room, and B flipped him off. Everyone cracked up. "Anyways, I just wanted to say that, Matt-" He turned to Matt and smiled. "I'm really happy for you. In the short time B and I lived with you guys, I could see how happy he made you. And I know that's a big deal for you. You've come a long way, little bro, and I'm so proud of you." Jamie's voice cracked, and I looked over at Matt to find him smiling. Jamie bit his lip and held up a drink that I just noticed. "Grab a drink, you tards! I'm making a toast." Everyone laughed and I rolled my eyes. We all went to the bar and grabbed various drinks. Only a few people took alcoholic ones. When we all gathered around again, Jamie started talking. "I didn't actually mean that, by the way. I know that four of the people in this room are certifiable genii." There were a few laughs. "Anyways. A toast!" Everyone held up their drinks. "To the newlyweds!" Everyone cheered. "To being gay!" Matt, B, our neighbours and I whooped. "To true love..." Matt and I looked at each other and smiled. "And to happily ever afters. Cheers!" Everyone echoed,

"Cheers!" and we all drank. Jamie wiped his mouth and spoke again.

"Now, I'd like to start the music so this lovely couple can have their first dance." He winked at me, and I jumped as Matt appeared beside me suddenly. He bowed like a geek and took my hand.

"May I have this dance?" I blushed and grinned.

"Why yes, you may." I giggled as the dance floor cleared and Matt took me gently into his arms. We had both taken off our jackets, and it made me smile, thinking that we had switched colours. I almost started crying as the first few noted of the song played. "Mail," I whispered.

"Mm-hmm?" he murmured into my ear.

"I love this song." He chuckled and pulled me closer.

"I know."

Send a wish upon a star  
>Do the work and you'll go far<br>Send a wish upon a star  
>Make a map and there you are<p>

Send a hope upon a wave  
>A dying wish before the grave<br>Send a hope upon a wave  
>For all this souls you failed to save<p>

We stood still for a moment, just hugging each other, before Matt picked me up, resting my feet on his. He started dancing as the chorus started up.

And you stood tall  
>Now you will fall<br>Don't break the spell  
>Of a life spent trying to do well<p>

And you stood tall  
>Now you will fall<br>Don't break the spell  
>Of a life spent trying to do well<p>

"I love you so much." I breathed, clinging to him. Matt rubbed my back and kissed my neck.

"I love you too, Angel." I tucked my head against his shoulder and let him dance me around, his warmth soothing me.

Send a question in the wind  
>It's hard to know where to begin<br>So send the question in the wind  
>And give an answer to a friend<p>

Matt started singing along, his low voice harmonizing with the higher harmonies already in the song. I shivered against him, holding tighter onto him.

Place your past into a book  
>Put in everything you ever took<br>Place your past into a book  
>Burn the pages let them cook<p>

I laughed softly, then shuddered as Matt's lips trailed over my scarred cheek. He kissed my neck again softly and stopped singing for a moment, breathing against my neck.

And you stood tall  
>Now you will fall<br>Don't break the spell  
>Of a life spent trying to do well<p>

And you stood tall  
>Now you will fall<br>Don't break the spell  
>Of a life spent trying to do well<p>

I let some tears fall, giggling against Matt's shoulder. He breathed a laugh and harmonized with the song again for the last two lines.

Send a wish upon a star

He hugged me to him, stroking my hair with one hand and holding me with his other arm around my waist.

Send a wish upon a star

The room burst into applause when the song ended, and I pulled back to look up at Matt, seeing tears in his eyes too. I pulled him close for a long kiss, holding his face.

And then the real party started. ;)

We got Near completely hammered and he tried to make out with Beyond, who looked terrified and confused. My straight friend and his wife watched our lesbian neighbours dance together with interest. I think his wife is a bit bi-curious now. Matt and I dirty-danced, which mortified Jamie beyond belief. I have to describe it because it was the hottest thing ever.

One of Matt's favourite songs (I think it was Play by Krooked K or something like that) came on and he lost his shit in excitement, pulling me into the middle of the dance floor. Despite the fact that Matt is tall and gangly, he's actually a pretty good dancer. The lyrics of the song made me laugh my ass off, and Matt soon joined in, still grinding against me. He kept on hand on my hip and the other on my ass, letting me tangle one hand in his hair and grip his shoulder with the other. He stepped forward so one of his legs was between mine and he started moving his hips, biting at my neck. His hip movements rubbed his thigh between my legs and I gasped at the friction. He laughed sexily into my ear and bit my ear lobe, tonguing the edge of my ear. I pulled him closer and practically humped his leg, breathing heavily against his hair.

"Mmn, Mail. When we get home, I'm gonna fuck you so hard..." I felt his hands unconsciously squeeze my hip and ass, and he moaned under his breath.

"Shit, Mihael. I want you so fucking bad." He tugged at my hips, pulling me close so I could feel his erection against my thigh. I pulled back and grinned at him.

"When we get home, baby." I ran my hands through his hair and he shivered, pulling me in for a short make-out session.

He didn't let me go for the rest of the night.

And_ shit_,

It was the best night of my life!

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><p><strong>Cheesy ending is cheesy!<strong>

**Get ready for the honeymoon next! :P**

**Love you guys! :D**


	26. Honeymoon!

**Took me long enough, but here it is. The final chapter of Matty's Story. I got some feels writing this, and I'm warning you now that when I say there's a fuckload of Lemon coming up, I mean it. It's really dirty. Anyways, without further ado...**

* * *

><p>Later that night, we returned home, sweaty and exhausted. I had taken off my jacket and had it slung on one arm, holding Mello's hand with the other. As soon as we got inside, I locked the door to our apartment and found myself pulled into Mello's arms. I dropped what I was holding and wrapped my arms around his waist. We held each other for a moment, listening to each other breathe. I danced my fingers up and down his spine while his played with strands of my ruby hair, fiddling with it and burying his nose into it to take in my scent.<p>

"Mmm." He sighed. I tightened my arms around him, but pulled away to look at him. I had kept my goggles on for the whole night, and he reached up to gently pull them off over my head. He carefully dropped them on the floor, taking care not to break them. My hair fell over my eyes, hiding them from him. Mello brushed my hair away and stared into my eyes, stroking my face. I stared back at him, counting the colours in his eyes. My eyes flickered down to his lips and I bit my bottom lip, looking back into his eyes. Holy shit, I wanted him so bad. He wound his hands into my hair and pulled his mouth towards mine, kissing me softly. I responded the same way, parting my lips slightly and barely slithering my tongue out to taste his. Our tongues brushed at their tips, and he whimpered quietly before he could stop himself. A violent shudder ran down my back and I nearly lost control.

"Oh, god, Mihael. Meet me in the bedroom?" he laughed and pulled away.

"Of course." He kissed my cheek and started toward the bedroom, swaying his hips. I bit my lip and groaned quietly as my pants got tighter. I trotted after him, closing the door behind me. I leaned against the wood, staring at Mello.

He took his jacket, shirt and tie off and lay down on the bed, fiddling with his rosary. It had been a while since I paid attention to his rosary. I hardly even noticed it anymore. Mello ran his fingers over the smooth wood of the cross, then tangled them in the beads, gripping them carefully. I crossed the room and stood beside Mello.

"Mihael?" Mello looked up at me, his hand still tangled in the necklace. He smiled.

"Yes, Mr. Keehl?" I blushed and smiled, looking down at my feet. Mello stopped playing with his rosary and moved so he was sitting with me between his legs. He rested his hands on my thighs, running his fingers up and down my denim-clad legs. "What's up, buttercup?" I ran a hand through my hair nervously.

"Did you- Do you ever wish I was a girl?" His hands paused their movements, resting just under my ass.

"I-" He looked at me questioningly, his eyebrows furrowed together. "To be honest, I can't even imagine being with you as a girl, or wanting to be with any girl at all. It's just not appealing. So, no. I've never wished you were a girl." His fingers crawled down my legs, stopping at the back of my knees. "Why would you think that?" I reached out and touched the cross on his rosary, picking it up carefully with the tips of my fingers.

"Just because... Well, you're catholic. God doesn't like gays." I said sadly, stroking the cross. Mello brought one hand up to stop mine. He intertwined our fingers, holding my hand. I felt him pull me closer, his fingers digging into the back of my knee.

"Fuck God." He whispered. He didn't sound angry, or bitter. He said it in a rather matter-of-fact way, actually. I looked at him, my eyes wide with shock. He was grinning. "You think I still believe in him after all these years?" He laughed, but I saw his eyes cloud slightly with pain. "I stopped believing in him the day I found out you were cutting yourself." I bit my lip in distress.

"Mel..." His hands crept up to touch my shoulders, urging me onto the bed. I sat beside him.

"If there was a God, then you would never have to feel pain. Because God doesn't let angels cry." I bit my lip to hide its trembling. Mello smiled and touched my face. "I wear this rosary because it belonged to my mother. What power would God have in a stupid necklace anyways?" He took his hands away to pull off his rosary. I giggled as he dropped it over my head, covering my mouth with my hand shyly. He pulled my hand away from my mouth and kissed me softly. "I love you. And I know that loving you is right. Nothing can be wrong about the way I feel for you. No one can ever tell me that I'm not allowed to love you, Mail. Whether he's God or not." I tangled my hands in his hair and pulled him in for a long kiss. When I pulled away, I whispered,

"I love you so much, Mihael. I'm so glad I married you." Mello laughed and tugged on my shirt.

"Come into bed." He murmured. I walked around the bed to the other side and climbed in beside him, smiling at him the whole time. I felt light-hearted and giddy. He straddled me and started pulling off my shirt, sitting back on his haunches while he ran a hand up my chest. He moaned quietly, low in his throat and gripped the rosary that still hung from my neck. He bent down, pulling himself forward with the rosary and whispered in my ear, "Why is this such a turn-on for me?" I let my hands run from his knees to his hips and up to his waist.

"We haven't had sex in almost two weeks. There are a lot of things that could turn you on right now. Like this-" I lightly dragged my nails up his waist and past his ribs, making him lean his head back and sigh.

"Uhn... Mail..." He groaned softly. I smiled to myself, loving his helplessness. My knees came up behind him, letting him lean against my thighs, and I brushed his nipples with my wandering fingers, tweaking them gently. Mello's hips rocked forward, and I could feel his ass brush against my growing erection.

"Or that." I said between gritted teeth. I refused to make a sound before I had him screaming or begging. Maybe both.

"Mail!" He cried as I sat up and started pleasing his sensitive nipples with my mouth. My legs dropped down, my knees still bent, so he was sitting in the gap between my open legs. Mello braced himself by holding on to my shoulders. I kissed across his chest softly.

"Yes?" I whispered against his neck.

"I- Ah!" He was cut off as I bit his neck and squeezed his ass at the same time.

"You what? C'mon babe, have I rendered you speechless already?" He sighed in frustration.

"I want you to make love to me." He pulled my head up so he could kiss me after he said that. I loved kissing Mello. It seemed that every kiss was an adventure. You never knew what a kiss would lead you to. Right now, it was a gentle kiss, with slow, sensual tongue movements and only soft bites. I actually liked the biting. I liked the way his teeth sunk into my bottom lip so gently I could barely feel it. I liked the way it sent a jolt of arousal through my body straight to my groin. I pulled him onto my lap and raised my hips, grinding my trapped cock against his ass. Mello shuddered and pulled at my hair desperately. "Oh! Please!"

"Mmfh- Mihael..." I whimpered as he rocked his hips against me again. I held his hips still and kissed down his neck. I wanted to take this slow. "Shh..." I breathed into his ear, brushing my hands up his waist, caressing him. He shivered and let out a tiny moan.

"Mail..." I let my lips clumsily devour him, starting at his ear lobe, moving down his neck to his collarbone, teasing softly at perky nipples. I pushed him down onto his back, crawling between his legs so I could leave little licks, kisses and nibbles down his stomach. I breathed hot air on his hips and his navel, making him sigh in pleasure.

"I want to make this last." I whispered. "I want to remember our first time as a married couple." I peeked up at him, and let him wind his fingers into my hair. He nodded.

"Mm, I agree." I smiled and worked at un-doing his pants. He watched my fingers deftly tug at the laces of his leather pants. I pulled them off of his soft, flawless legs, and ran my hands along them, stopping at his upper thighs.

I kissed the insides of his thighs, then licked a trail to his hip. By the time my mouth reached his arousal, Mello had arched his back in anticipation, gripping the bed sheets tightly. I took him into my mouth slowly, swirling my tongue around his tip. A surprised cry left his lips, and he blushed a deep red. I pulled away with a hard suck on the head of his erection, and put three fingers in my mouth. Mello looked down and moaned when he saw what I was doing.

"Nngh, Mail. P-please." I pulled my wet fingers out of my mouth.

"Don't worry, love. I'll take care of you." I spread his legs and carefully pressed two fingers inside of him. He gasped and groaned in approval, bucking his hips so my fingers went further inside of him. I slid my third finger in and found his prostate, rubbing it with the tips of my fingers, just enough to drive him crazy. I then took him into my mouth again, rubbing my tongue against his heated flesh and sucking just hard enough to pull a moan from Mello. I pressed harder against his sweet spot, making his thighs twitch and his muscles clench around my fingers.

"Mmnh, Mail... Wait... Uh!" He groaned loudly as I deep-throated him briefly, then pulled back to suck the sensitive head, fondling his balls with my free hand. "N-no! I- AH!" I watched as one of Mello's hands flew down to his erection, squeezing the base. I pulled my mouth away from him, gently took my fingers out of him and my other hand away as Mello desperately held back his orgasm. He clenched the sheets with one hand and thrashed his head back and forth on the pillow, moaning incoherently. The sight was so unbelievably sexy that my hand crept between my legs and I started touching myself through my jeans automatically. When Mello got a hold of himself, he sat up slowly, panting harshly, and pulled my face closer to his. He kissed me slowly, passionately, and pulled away to whisper against my lips. "I want to come inside of you." My breathing hitched in my throat. I moaned and breathed,

"Oh my fucking God." before jumping on him, attacking his mouth with mine. Mello desperately started taking off my pants while making out with me, putting his hand down my boxers and squeezing my length. "Uhn, Mihael." I moaned, tonguing his ear. He groaned desperately and tugged my pants and boxers off, wrapping a leg around my waist and rolling us over, pushing me onto the bed.

"I can't take it anymore!" He growled, sending shivers down my spine. He nibbled softly down my neck, touching every inch of skin above my hips. "I want you so fucking bad, Mail." I gasped and pulled him closer.

"I need you inside me." I whispered. Mello moaned and put three fingers in his mouth, coating them in spit.

"Tell me if you need me to go slower." I nodded in consent and gasped as his first finger slipped in, digging deep to touch my prostate. I sighed and relaxed myself, allowing another finger to join the first. Mello scissored me, and I relaxed my muscles to allow myself to be stretched. He pressed his fingers against my prostate again, making my member throb with need.

"Mmnh- Mihael!" I whimpered. "Please!" He groaned and slid his last finger in, making sure I was well stretched. I gasped as his mouth closed over my hot cock, sucking softly. "Uhn! Holy fuck." He pulled his fingers out of me and his mouth away from me, doing something he's never done before.

I jumped and gripped the bed sheets when I felt his tongue probing my entrance.

"H-holy- Oh my god! Mihael! AH!" I felt his tongue slide in and the very tip brushed my prostate, nearly sending me over the edge. I stroked his hair, trying to get him to stop. "S-stop. Babe, please. I need you." He slipped his tongue out of me and licked my pre-come off of my member.

"Ready?" he panted, positioning himself at my entrance. I pulled his face down so I could kiss him.

"Mm-hmm." Mello leaned over me, reaching for our bottle of lube. I grabbed his wrist. "No, no lube. I only want you." Mello's eyes widened.

"I need lube, Mail. I don't want to hurt you." I smiled up at him, brushing my lips against his.

"I just had your tongue in me. I think I'll be okay." Mello bit his lip and spat on his hand, rubbing it over his erection.

"I had to do something." He murmured, kissing my nose. He leaned down so our stomachs and chests were pressed together, our skin brushing and making a small gasp leave my lips. His hands curved over my hips as he guided his erection inside of me. I squeezed my eyes shut and moaned, my mouth wide open and panting. For some reason, I was I was much more sensitive to every sensation I was feeling tonight. I could feel every inch of him as he went inside me, the slight burn and the immense pleasure I had at being filled by Mello.

"Mmm... Oh, Mihael. Oh..." I whispered, my hands softly running down his back, reveling in the feel of his soft skin under my fingertips. He shuddered, and pulled me closer, thrusting his hips against me. I gasped as he brushed my prostate. "Mm, more." my voice sounded too soft, too quiet, but the way Mello was doing me was making me melt.

"Uhn, you feel so good, Mail." He breathed. He pulled on my hips and pushed deeper than he's ever gone, making a soft cry and an even softer whimper leave my mouth.

"Ha-ah! You've never... Oh, yes. You haven't been that deep before- Oh!" I grabbed at his shoulders as he pulled back and then pressed back in powerfully, making jolts of pleasure run up my spine and down my thighs as he slammed against my prostate. "Please. Fuck me harder, Mihael." He shivered at my words and started up fast thrusts, keeping himself buried deep inside my body. His gentle caresses on my face, arms and waist were contradictions to the almost harsh thrusts that filled my entire being with pleasure. As I approached my climax, I went limp, my arms spreading out on either side of me, my head lying back against the pillows with my mouth open and panting as the lower half of me tensed in anticipation of my orgasm. Mello paused his movements, making me whine in need. I snaked my hands down to touch his hips, bringing him into me again. I felt his muscles twitching, telling me how hard it was for him to stop.

"I'm gonna." He took a moment to catch his breath as I pulled his hips closer, pressing him to my prostate again. "I'll come if we keep going." He finished, sounding desperate. I moved my hands slowly up his body and held his head, bringing his mouth down to mine.

"We have three days booked from work. And we have some catching up to do." I reminded him, sucking his bottom lip softly. "Make me come, Mihael. I need you." He groaned at that statement, and leaned over me, burying his head against my neck as he started pounding into me again. I moaned into his ear, being vocal about my pleasure, for I knew he loved it. I got louder the closer I got, until I was almost shouting. "M-Mihael, I'm- Ohhh! I'm coming!" My breathing went out of control as my stomach tightened, signaling my release. The pleasure had built up to the point where it was almost unbearable. If he stopped now, I was going to cry. Mello thrusted faster, gasping out,

"Go on; come for me, my love. Uhn, fuck! Mail!" He moaned and his thrusting went haywire and I felt him come inside of me, pushing me completely over the edge. My back arched and I closed my eyes, tilting my head back and moaning as my release took over me. My orgasm came in intense waves, causing me to shiver and cry out, my hips bucking with every wave of pleasure. When it was over, I was panting desperately and Mello was kissing my throat and neck, breathing heavily on my skin. I held him in place, my eyes closed, just wanting him to stay close to me, feeling his breath on my neck. It was very comforting to me.

"Mmm... I love you, Mihael." Mello moved his face to kiss me clumsily, touching the side of my head and my cheek.

"I love you." he whispered, bringing his other hand up to hold my face. He cradled my face and kissed me passionately, nipping at my bottom lip and tongue. I moaned as he pressed against me, getting hard again. Mello pulled away to laugh and kissed down my neck, nibbling my ear. "Hard already, babe? Your stamina is really impressive, Mail."

"I'm- Ahh, I'm not fully hard yet. Mmm, fuck..." he slipped out of me and crept down my body, kissing and licking at my skin. I shivered as his tongue ran over my nipple, his teeth following soon after. He bit down very softly, rolling my sensitive nub between his teeth gently. "Holy shit, Mihael!" He blew on my wet, hardened skin and closed his lips over my nipple, sucking softly and making me tremble a bit under him. "Oh, please..."

"Mmm, you top now." Mello whispered, rolling over and pulling me on top of him. I attacked his mouth with mine, kissing him desperately. I rolled my hips against him, pure need coursing through my body. I don't know what happened, but a sudden wave of lust and possessive adrenaline took control of my body.

"Ahh, I need you, Mail... I need you right now." Then, without my permission, I started whispering the dirtiest things into Mello's ear.

"I wanna bury my cock so deep inside your ass, and make you scream with pleasure." I leaned down and bit his neck, trailing my hand down his body to grip his new erection. "I wanna make you come so hard you forget your name. I wanna fuck you so good you can't take any more."

"Holy shit, Mail! Where is this coming from?" Mello whimpered under me, raising his hips slightly. I felt his member throb in my hand.

"You want me?" I growled into his ear. He moaned softly.

"Yes!" his voice came out breathy and begging. "Fuck, yes!" I started stroking his hard shaft, slowly and tortuously.

"Do you like feeling my hand on your dick?" I panted. "Do you like it when I jack you off like this?" I increased the pressure slightly and sped up a bit, loving the way Mello gasped and groaned helplessly.

"Yes, oh fucking hell yes, Mail!"

"How about my mouth? Do you like my hot little tongue running along every inch of your desperate member, sucking you into ecstasy?" Mello whimpered, and my hand grew slick on his manhood as some pre-come dribbled out.

"Yes." he whispered. "Yes, I love it when you suck me off." I used my fingertips and stroked myself with my free hand, exploring my hard length.

"Don't you love it when I touch myself in front of you because you're so unbelievably sexy that I can't control myself?" Mello moaned loudly as I sped up my hand on his dick.

"Oh, yes! God, yes I love it! Mm, harder, Mail." I squeezed him harder as he demanded, with one more question to ask.

"And tell me, baby... Do you like having my fingers shoved up your tight little ass? Do you like it when I torture your prostate until you're ready to come, without even penetrating you with my rock hard cock?" I nibbled his ear, and Mello cried out my name as he came into my hand.

"Oh, god... Where did you learn to talk dirty like that?" he panted. I had my fingers in my mouth, lubing them up, so I couldn't answer right away. I pressed a finger into him and kissed down his neck, whispering,

"I'm so fucking horny right now, Mihael. Never let me go this long without sex again. I want to fuck you into tomorrow..." I moaned as I slipped the second finger inside him, feeling how tight he was. "I'm going to give you the best sex of your life, Mihael Keehl."

"Oh, fuck... Right there..." I rubbed at his prostate, watching his thighs twitch with pleasure as he grew hard once again.

"I missed this. I love seeing you like this, completely at my mercy..." Mello whimpered beneath me, raising his hips for more stimulation. I laughed breathily against his neck and put my third finger inside him, spreading my fingers and stretching him out.

"S-seriously, where did you learn how to say things like that? You know it gets me off when you get like that..." I twisted my fingers around inside him, pressing against his prostate, and watched his body freeze up. "Ahh, holy hell!"

"You mean when I dominate you? Tell me, Mihael, should we bring some toys into this?" He gasped as I bit into his neck.

"W-which toys?" I laughed darkly and pulled my fingers out of him, ignoring his cry of disappointment as I reached into the bedside table. I straightened up and kissed him, hiding my new toy.

"When I told you not to get lube, it was partially because I didn't want you to see this." I murmured, showing him my brand new dildo. His eyes widened, and his cock stiffened just a bit more.

"W-when then f-fuck did you buy th-that?" He stammered, biting his lip softly. I grinned and bent down to kiss him.

"A while ago." I winked at him and placed it at my lips, slowly taking its length into my mouth. I allowed one of my hands grip my swollen, throbbing dick and stroke it, making me moan around the fake penis in my mouth. Mello moved my hand away from myself, using his hand to pleasure me instead. Eventually, I pulled away from him and slipped the dildo out of my mouth. "Ready to play?" I groaned, my voice sounding unintentionally low and rough. Mello pulled his hand away from me and spread his legs, exposing his entrance to me.

"Yes! Please!" I reached for lube, and spread it around the dildo, gazing down at Mello as I did so. I positioned it at his eager hole and slowly, ever so slowly, I pushed it inside his body. He gasped as the tip stretched his entrance, then sighed as the length slid into his body. "Ahh..." He moaned softly when I let it brush his prostate.

"Does that feel good, baby?" I asked, pulling the toy back slightly, then pushing it deeper. He spread his legs wider and groaned.

"Mmn, yes... More... Ah!" He cried out in surprise and pleasure as I shoved my toy into him, aiming for his pleasure spot. "Jesus, Mail, you have good aim." He panted. I smiled to myself.

"You want more?" He nodded eagerly.

"Yes! Please, more!" I showed Mello a small remote and pressed a button on it to start low vibrations from the dildo to please his prostate. "Ugh..." He sighed, relaxing a bit. I gently thrust it in and out, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, rubbing the vibrating toy against his most intimate areas. Mello became a panting, moaning mess in no time. I smiled and reached for the lube and spread it on three fingers, shoving them inside my eager entrance to prepare myself. I sighed and tilted my head back, working my fingers in and out.

"Mmn, see how eager I am for you, Mihael?" I addressed Mello, who moaned softly. "I took all three of them at once." I panted, working my fingers deeper, but avoiding my prostate. "And maybe..." I slipped a fourth finger in, and groaned loudly. "Uhn that feels good..."

"Oh, god... Please, Mail, I'm gonna come!" I rolled my head to look at him, grinning smugly.

"Already?" I asked. "Well that won't do." I pulled my fingers out of myself, frowning at the empty feeling, and reached for two cock rings. I slid one onto Mello's twitching cock, and the other onto my erection. Mello whimpered and clawed at the bed sheets.

"M-mail?" I smirked evilly.

"I want you." I purred. "All. Night. Long." I punctuated my words with pauses, positioning myself above his hot, stiff member. I sat down directly on it, taking all of him all at once. He gasped and I felt his hips buck upwards, the tip of his penis brushing my prostate.

"Fucking hell fire, Satan's Jesus, God's chafing testicles-" he whispered quickly, so fast I barely heard it. I moved so he was almost all the way out, clenched against his tip, then sunk back down on his newly swelling dick. "Ungh, MAIL!" He cried out, thrusting into my sweet spot again. I whimpered. "Oh, fuck, I would have come right then... You shouldn't do that." He wiggled his hips. "And that fucking dildo... Feels so fucking good. Holy shit, you're a sex god, I swear to fuck." I laughed softly, slightly out of breath.

I pressed down so his cock pushed against my prostate, sending a delicious ripple of pleasure through my body. I gasped and moaned, tilting my head back. I began riding him, making him gasp in sudden pleasure. Mihael brought his hands up to my hips and pulled me down onto him so he could go deeper, making both of us whimper in pleasure. I wanted an overload of pleasure. I wanted this to be a night we would never forget. I rode him harder, nearly screaming at the white-hot pleasure that ran through my body. I had never had stimulation on my prostate like that before; a constant harsh slam of our hips directly into the most pleasurable part of my body. I almost couldn't continue, but I pressed on, pulling at his hips. The deeper he was, the more intense my pleasure was. My screams turned into quiet whimpers and moans as I felt myself rapidly nearing a dry-climax. Mello's body was shaking, the hands on my hips were stroking, trembling and clawing gently to show the effects of his stimulation. My stomach was almost burning with the immense pleasure I was feeling. I could feel Mello's penis near my belly he was so deep. He cried out, grabbing at my hips and thrusting forwards, causing me to scream as he somehow pushed harder against my prostate.

"I'm gonna... Mmm, Mail why did you put a ring on me- Oh my god, yes, yes, yes!" Mello's thighs twitched and he threw his head back, panting and moaning as his body mimicked release. He stayed hard inside me, his dick twitching with the need to cum. My bottom lip trembled and my manhood darkened in colour from non-release as I also dry-orgasmed, rocking my hips slightly. We paused to recover, our erections painful and needy. "Take them off, baby. Please?"

"N-no. We can do one more." I insisted, riding him again. He gasped and a loud moan was pulled from his lips as I reached behind us and fiddled with the dildo inside him, twisting it around and pushing it in deeper. He yelped and rocked his hips to push it deeper, causing an interesting stroke against my prostate. "Mm, so good..." I panted, taking my hot member into my hand and stroking it lightly. I twitched from non-release into my hand, making me grip myself harder, but keep my slow stroking pace. The pleasure filling my entire being was almost too much, but I needed more, so much more. I pressed down onto his hard rod, my thighs twitching. I stroked faster on my dick, bringing myself into another dry-orgasm. I cried out his name, bending over as the feeling tightened my stomach muscles. I clenched around him and he thrust up as his second almost-orgasm took over him.

"P-please! Please take it off!" I climbed off of Mello, his erection sliding out of me, and pulled his ring off of his penis with my teeth, being careful of his sensitive flesh. "Thank you!" He sighed, petting my hair in gratitude. I smiled and kissed him, then pulled off my own ring and got on top of him again.

"I won't last long." I told him, positioning his dick at my entrance.

"That's okay, baby." Mello placed his hands on my hips, and after I pressed the tip of his erection into my hole, he pulled me the rest of the way down, sighing and shivering.

"Is it good, Mihael?" He groaned lightly.

"It's so good." He panted. I grinned.

"Excellent." I lifted my hips, and sunk down to penetrate myself as deep as I was before, crying out. "There we are." I managed, lifting and dropping again. Once I had him where I wanted him, I started fucking myself as hard and fast as I could, pushing his penis against my prostate as hard as possible, trembling and screaming in pleasure. Soon, I felt Mello twitch inside me, and my insides were coated in hot cum, Mello's cry of ecstasy lighting my body on fire. I pumped myself on his dick, milking his orgasm. My fingers were wrapped tightly around the base of my erection, holding my release. I got off of him as he softened, pulling the dildo out of him and turning it off. I sat beside him, feeling needy and twitchy. Mello looked over at me, panting.

"You didn't come." He said softly, looking disappointed in himself.

"I held it back." I reassured him, showing him the fingers around my cock. He rolled over, pushing me onto my back, and pulled my fingers away from myself, bending over my erection.

"I'll take care of this." He breathed, his tongue reaching out to taste me.

Mello's POV

I licked him once, then took a good look at him. His cock was flushed and curved towards his belly, stiffer than I remember seeing him before. I stroked his length once, rubbing my finger around the tip, stroking the slit. Matt cried out, his hands grabbing the sheets on either side of him. I took him into my mouth, swirling my tongue around him and sucking hard on him, loving the weight of his member on my tongue. Matt had a gorgeous cock. I actually enjoyed going down on him. Maybe I should do it more often... I looked up at him to catch his expression, taking him deeper to reward the wanton look on his face. He met my gaze and his hips bucked, a loud groan leaving his lips. I pulled away and grinned devilishly at him. Matt moaned and whimpered.

"Make me come, please!" He begged. I licked at the cum that left his hole, dipping my tongue inside slightly. He whined in need as I sucked lightly on each of his testicles. I then brought my mouth to his dick and sucked like no tomorrow, shoving three fingers in his ass and finding his prostate. I sucked him and fucked him with my fingers, loving the shivers and whimpers as his cock throbbed him my mouth. "Mihael! Yes, yes! Ungh!" He screamed as he released, his entrance spasming around my fingers and his dick twitching as he filled my mouth with cum. I swallowed and sucked on him until he was finished. When I pulled away, his body was still tense with orgasm, his breathing hard and fast. "Mm, Mihael..." He whispered. I crawled up his body, completely spent, and rested on his chest, kissing his throat.

"Holy shit." I panted. Matt smiled and pulled me close for a slow kiss, his tongue tracing mine and tasting his semen.

"That was amazing." He breathed when he pulled away. "God, I'm exhausted." I laughed and traced his stomach softly.

"We have tomorrow too." I cuddled up close to him. "You're gonna be sore."

"I'm already a bit sore." He groaned and adjusted his position. "My stummy hurts." I snorted.

"Stummy?"

"Stomach plus tummy." Matt explained.

"Oh, okay." I replied sarcastically, settling against him again. I sat up suddenly. "Wait, why does your stomach hurt? How fucking deep was I?" He laughed quietly and pulled me down again.

"I got greedy. Lucky for me, your dick is big enough to get that deep in me." I blushed, but my ego ate up his compliment. "I'm gonna pass out soon, so goodnight baby." I rolled my eyes and hugged him, pressing our bodies close.

"Night."

...

I woke up to the smell of pancakes and bacon, with someone underneath the blankets, holding my legs open and sucking me off. I let out a soft groan and reached down, my hands meeting soft hair.

"Mmn, Matt..." I moaned, feeling him shiver between my legs. I was close already, closing my eyes to better focus on the feeling of his tongue swirling around me and the soft pull of his sucking, bringing me closer to ecstasy. "Aah... So good..." I moaned. He shuddered and sucked harder, quickening his movements. "Hah- Ahh, yes Matt!" His hands parted my now-tense thighs more so he could take me deeper into his mouth. "Fuuuck! I'm gonna come soon!" I warned, a pleasant shudder running up my spine. He moaned around my length, his entire mouth and throat vibrating around me. "Shit! *Yes!*" My body shook as I released, Matt stroking my thighs soothingly while he continued to suck so I could enjoy my afterglow. He pulled away and slithered up my body, his head popping out of the blankets to rest on my chest.

"Good morning." He panted, licking his lips. I moaned and pulled him down for a kiss.

"That was an amazing wake-up call." He giggled cutely.

"Thought you might like it." He teased. He suddenly changed our position to a very lewd one. "Can you return the favor, gorgeous?" He straddled my head, his cock touching my lips.

"With pleasure." I replied, taking him into my mouth. He braced himself on the headboard, his body stretching out gorgeously, and his hips started rocking as I started sucking, until he was practically fucking my mouth. I couldn't get enough of his taste, of his little whines and moans as he got close, his body tightening up. I switched to my hands just before he came, catching his semen on my lips and tongue, and a bit on my cheek. He crawled back down to settle beside me, licking his cum off my cheek, making me blush. He laid his head on my shoulder and caught his breath.

"I made you breakfast." He said, gesturing to the bedside table. I laughed and stroked his hair, kissing him softly.

"Thank you. I'm surprised you're even up this early." He smiled against my lips.

"Only for you, my darling love." I rubbed his shoulder gently.

"How are you feeling today?" He let out a groan and pouted.

"Owie." He answered. "Eat your food before it gets cold." He rolled off of me so I could sit up, and slid under the blankets, his cool legs tangling with mine. He lay beside me, tracing patterns on my stomach as I ate. Damn, Matt could cook. He laughed fondly as I licked chocolate syrup off my plate, and stole a piece of bacon to munch on. "What do you want to do today?" He asked lightly, kissing my shoulder. I paused to think.

"I dunno... What's a honeymoon-ish thing to do that's not sex?"

"Snorkeling." Matt suggested, mischief coloring his tone. I lightly smacked his arm.

"Don't be a retard. We can't go snorkeling. And how sexy is that? Who wants to see their partner with a tube shoved down their throat?" Matt burst out laughing.

"Someone with a very sick fetish." I wrinkled my nose in distaste, making him grin. We snuggled for a while in comfortable silence, Matt playing with my fingers and touching my ring. He laughed happily against my neck, placing light kisses there. "Mine..." He claimed softly, his lips working up to behind my ear. I chuckled and pulled him closer to my side.

"You're mine too." I reminded him. He hummed in agreement and nuzzled against my neck.

"I've always been yours. Always will be." My heart swelled with pride.

"I love you so much." I breathed. He exhaled a laugh, making me shiver.

"I love you too." He kissed behind my ear again and pulled back to look at me. "Are you ready?" He asked suddenly. I gave him a weird look.

"Ready for what?" He smiled and pet my hair.

"Our new life. This is our life, together." I blushed, my heart racing. I tugged my husband (Hee!) down for a kiss.

"That was incredibly cheesy, and also adorable." I informed him. He giggled as I rolled over to kiss him properly. If you had came to me when I was nineteen and told me I'd be happily married to my soul mate at age 22, I would have told you that you were nuts. And I probably would have shot you. And yet, here I was; crazy in love with an oddball ginger and not regretting a single second of my life with him. I pulled away from our kiss, running my hands through his hair. In our warm bed, bare as the day we were born, our bodies pressed together and filled to the brim with happiness; now that was bliss. "You're so beautiful." I whispered. Matt smiled winningly at me, making me laugh purely out of joy and kiss him again. When we pulled away, I laid against his chest and closed my eyes, letting him stroke my hair.

"Mihael?" He murmured.

"Mm-hmm?" I hummed in response. What he said next caught me totally off guard.

"Can we get a kid?"

* * *

><p><strong>So there you are!<strong>

**I'd like to thank all my reviewers and all the patient people who even bothered to read this story. This was my first Fanfiction, so I know it's not very good, but thank you for sticking it out with me and helping me grow as a writer.**

**I will be writing more, as I have the entire plotline of a new story already planned out, so hopefully I'll be able to update somewhat regularly on that one.**

**Thank you all so much, I love you all! *Hugs and kisses***

**See you soon!**

**-Ray :)**


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